"This day, anything goes! Burning bodies hanging from poles! I remember Halloween! Halloween! HALLOWEEEEEN! HALLLLLLLLLLLLOWWWWWWWWWWWWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN!" The sound of The Misfits's song, "Halloween" slowly fades out, showing a pink-haired goddess standing at the doorway, handing out tricks to the kids; some of which are dressed as pirates, ghosts, a giant nacho and as Anna Nicole Smith's corpse. The person with the pink hair, twists and dangles at their hair, admiring the costumes, especially the Anna Nicole one. Pinky: I like you the best. I should I say breast. Mehehehe. Old pinky cackles to herself and then dumps a bowl of candy into each of the kid's basket, allowing them to happily run off, venturing to the next household. Shutting the door, the pink-haired assailant turns around... only to unveil the form of Chris Extreme. Yes, once again, Chris Extreme has dressed up like Morgana; just like his costume from last year. Wearing his usual tight boxers, he frolics around, pretending to be the current World Champion, skipping along and pretending to sexily rub his own breasts. Chrisgana: Look at me, I'm Morgana! I'm so hot! I'm so cool! Everybody loves me! Tehehehe! Just then, the doorbell rings again. Chrisgana: Time to see who is interrupting the World Champion in all her glory! Lalalalala. Like a fairy princess, Chris Extreme grabs his pink wand and tip-toes towards the door. He opens it. Bam! A fist callously smashes into Chris Extreme's face, knocking the bowl of goodies out of his hand, sending him stumbling backwards and toppling him over a chair. In favt, his pink wig even flies off. Chris Extreme: Mmmf-- what the hell? Standing above the bowl of treats is current World Champion, Morgana, with the World Title slung over her left shoulder, proudly displaying her Sailor Moon costume that she is wearing for tonight. Hunching over, she picks up the bowl of treats, dumps them into her purse and then looks down at a dazed Chris Extreme. Morgana: How dare you! She picks up the pink wig, tosses it away and then saunters off, exiting the area, leaving Chris knocked out on the floor. Chris Extreme: Ugh... that bitch! The image fades out, thus starting tonight's programming.

Singles Match The lights dim and the guitar/keyboard, for high-speed intro of "Time to Dance" by Panic! at the Disco blares through the speakers, as the name DAVIS appears in sparks and dims to lights. The crowd gets louder and louder, chanting "DAVIS! DAVIS!", while the hallway dims to dark. Soon, a shadowed-figure emerges into the light of the crowd. The chanting becomes incoherent screaming as the champ walks down the carpet and into the ring. This guy, Mark Davis, removes his dark green silk robe and throws it asunder, raising his arms in recognition of the crowd and foreshadowing of triumph. He then saunters towards the ringside area, where he slides inside, ready for his match to start. Steve Hebert: It's Halloween night and we have someone dressed as a set of nipples in the ring! Lex Robinson: No, that's just Mark Davis. Steve Hebert: Well, I'll be damned. Lex Robinson: Anyhow, good evening, ladies and gentleman. I'm glad you can turn away from the trick-or-treating, the spooking and the re-runs of Friday the 13th to watch our show tonight! Steve Hebert: But then again, that Friday the 13th marathon sounds like fun. Switch the channel, everyone. Lex Robinson: Uhm... no, don't do that. In any event, we've got an excellent show for you tonight! We'll have champions crowned... we'll have high-risk matches... we'll have the World Title defended ina monstrous structure... we'll have... Steve Hebert: We'll have Lex Robinson dressed as a cow; and me, Steve Hebert, dressed as a giant pumpkin! Lex Robinson: The resemblance is uncanny, Steve. You look like a giant pumpkin without the suit, even. Steve Hebert: Eat me. Lex Robinson: Hey, get your hands off my udders! "Simple Design" by Breaking Benjamin goes off and Dan Black comes out from the back and then runs into the ring. He climbs each turnbuckle, pointing to the audience and he goes to the center of the ring and stomps his right foot, which ignites pyro all around the ringside area. Steve Hebert: Holy Jesus, it's Dan Black! Lex Robinson: Aka: "The Bulldozer"; aka: "The no-good bully". Steve Hebert: Hey, Dan's the one with the bandaged hand. It was Mark Davis who inflicted that damage. Lex Robinson: Oh, so I guess that completely nulls everything that Dan Black has done to everyone else? Including stealing and hiding the Purity and Lust Titles, making it so that Chris Staggs and Sebastian York couldn't hold their own titles. Steve Hebert: Uhm... well... yes. Lex Robinson: Go figure. The bell rings... Lex Robinson: There's the bell... and Dan Black immediately charges across the ring and clubs Mark Davis in the back! Steve Hebert: With his own bandaged arm, too. The faggot, Mark Davis, had it coming, anyhow. What kind of man ties another man up and then performs sexual thrusts at him? Lex Robinson: Uhh... I don't know what you were watching, but I saw something completely different. Steve Hebert: It's the nipples. It's definitely the nipples. Lex Robinson: In any event, Dan Black has Mark Davis toppled over and is continuing to kick, stomp and punch him. Having Mark backed into the corner, Dan unloads with some knees-to-the-face, eventually picking Mark up, in the corner. Steve Hebert: There's some back-elbows, too! See, Dan Black isn't going to let things go unpunished. Lex Robinson: Let's not forget that the winner of this match also gets the very first shot at the firsy Impulse Champion! Steve Hebert: Hmm... maybe Dan can steal and hide that title, too. Boy, that'd really piss Corey Page off. Man, I have some great ideas. Lex Robinson: ...Anyhow, Dan Black continues to pummel Mark Davis, even striking him with some severely stiff punches to the jaw. Nevertheless, he lets up and then Irish-whips Mark across the ring, where he slams into the opposite set of turnbuckles. Charging in, Dan Black goes to connect with a running clothesline... only for Mark to roll out of the way! Steve Hebert: Son of a bitch. Dan Black smashes himself against those turnbuckle pads. Not only that, but he turns around, only to walk into a barrage of left-and-right kicks from Mark Davis; who finishes off with a leaping spin-kick to the jaw! Lex Robinson: Mark Davis is retaliating against Dan Black's decision to attack him from behind -- and, right now, it's working. Having delivered one more roundhouse kick, connecting to the jaw, Mark Davis makes several steps back and runs forward. He leaps onto Dan Black, trying to Monkey-Flip him... Steve Hebert: And it obviously fails! Instead, Dan Black holds himself still and pushes Mark Davis back, spilling him onto the canvas. Lex Robinson: Just as Mark begins to rise again, though, Dan storms out, extends his right arm and hits a vicious lariat! The force of this blow is enough to completely vault Mark around, knocking him onto his back! Dan makes the cover! Steve Hebert: Good! Hook that leg, Dan. The referee makes the count... ...1...2... Lex Robinson: MArk Davis kicks out at the count of two! Steve Hebert: Bah. Dan Black opts to lift Mark to his feet and then strike him with a knee to the gut. Striking with some forearms, Dan whips that handsome metrosexual into the ropes. Upon rebounding, Mark and his nipples run right into a spinebuster-powerbomb from Dan Black, who then tries for another cover. Lex Robinson: Yup. Here we go, again... ...1...2... Lex Robinson: And once more, Mark Davis kicks out. Steve Hebert: You just know that this is only pissing Dan Black off. By the end of the night, Mark Davis will be missing his head. Count on it. Lex Robinson: Despite the guarantees from Steve, Dan Black lifts Mark Davis up to his feet, only to then casually toss him into the corner. Slowly stepping in, Dan gives some more rising knees to Mark's gut, forcing Mark to topple over and hold onto his gut. Steve Hebert: Some more elbows to the back of Mark's neck, too! My guarantee will prove to be true, Lex. Just wait and see. Finished driving elbows into the back of Mark Davis's head and neck, Dan easily hoists Mark Davis up, having Mark feeling the brunt of the blows. After motioning to the audience, who respond back with a jeer, Dan Black lifts Mark up to his feet, headbutts him and then proceeds to standing fireman's carry him. Steve Hebert: We're getting closer and closer to the end, Lex. I can feel it. The end of Mark Davis, that is. He should have never messed with Dan Black. Lex Robinson: I wouldn't speak so soon, Steve. As Dan goes to turn around, Mark awakens and begins unleashing a flurry of elbows to the side of Dan's skull, eventually forcing Dan to allow Mark back to his feet. Steve Hebert: Well, Jesus. This isn't good! Jack Skellington won't like this! Lex Robinson: Slipping behind Dan, Mark jumps into the air and connects with a dropkick, sending Dan sailing towards the ropes, where he bounces off, only to rebound and walk right into a spin-wheel kick from Mark Davis! As a result, Dan rolls to the floor, trying to regain his thoughts. Steve Hebert: Oh, goddamnit. This isn't supposed to be happening! Lex Robinson: But it is! Furthermore, Mark steps near the ropes, watching as Dan stumbles around on the floor, and then decides to slingshot himself over the top rope... Soaring through the air, gravity works its magic and pulls Mark towards the ground, where Dan Black is waiting with his arms outstretched. Landing in Dan's clutches, Mark's attempt as a pescado is thwarted, as the former Purity Champion is able to maintain his balance, catching Mark in mid-air. Steve Hebert: Hah! See?! So much for that! Lex Robinson: Oh boy... having been caught by Dan Black, Mark Davis is swung-out and is then driven to the floor with a swinging sidewalk-slam! Steve Hebert: Dan Black literally grounded Mark into the floor. Hell, you could see the back of his skull hit the cement! Lex Robinson: That's the bad part. Steve Hebert: Bad? Are you nuts? That's freaking wonderful! Laid out on the floor, Mark Davis can barely move, as Dan Black hovers over him, giving him some stomps and kicks. Lifting Mark to his feet, Dan grabs Mark's hair and shows him the thumb that he injured. Bashing Mark's skull off the apron, Dan rolls his opponent inside and climbs up onto the ringside apron, where he then re-enters the ring. Lex Robinson: Dan Black comes back inside, but he isn't finished. Steve Hebert: Damn right he's not. He still has to give Mark Davis some more punishment for what he's done to his hand. Lex Robinson: I suppose so. Dan Black lifts Mark up to his feet, deciding to not go for a cover. Standing around, he watches as a dizzy Mark Davis remains dazed on his feet, unaware of his surroundings. Smirking and laughing at Mark's expense, Dan swipes his hand across Mark's face, slapping him. Steve Hebert: Good! Show those nipples who's the boss! Lex Robinson: Once again, Dan Black offers another slap to Mark's face. Pushing Mark around, Dan proceeds to back into the ropes and bounce off with a lariat... but Mark Davis ducks it! From behind, he tries for a backslide... Steve Hebert: But Dan Black's strength is too much; he's able to keep his balance. He swings Mark Davis around... Lex Robinson: Again, he tries for a clothesline; and once more, Mark Davis ducks it! This time, he leaps onto Dan Black's shoulders and rolls him up with a victory Roll... Steve Hebert: Uh ohs. Lex Robinson: The referee, surprised by the happenings, drops down and makes the count... ...1...2... Lex Robinson: One... two... and... Steve Hebert: No! Dan Black kicks out! Lex Robinson: Agh! Mark Davis quickly rises, delivers some rapid-fire kicks to Dan Black's head, bounces off the ropes and returns with a climbing-enziguiri, bringing Dan down to one knee! Steve Hebert: Ugh, time to put a bullet in my skull. If a metrosexual can beat Dan Black, I just don't want to live. Climbing to the top turnbuckle, without haste and without worry, Mark Davis waits for Dan Black to face him. When the time is right, he leaps through the air, aiming at "The Bulldozer"... Lex Robinson: Mark tries for a flying splash to the back of Dan Black... but Dan snaps up and clotheslines him, while coming off the top rope! Steve Hebert: Finally! There's that lariat! His head almost got lobbed off. Lex Robinson: Quickly, Dan lifts Mark Davis up, but brings him right back down with a chokeslam! Steve Hebert: Yes! Now that's what I like to see! Hell, he's picking Dan right back up, yet again! LeX Robinson: Indeed. After a kick to the gut, he positions Mark Davis between his legs with a standing headscissors. He pulls him up onto his shoulders and then drops him down with The Hospitalizer! Dan Black's legs are hooked over Mark's arms... Steve Hebert: Yes! My god yes! Referee, count that shit! True to Steve's words, the referee drops down and makes the count... ...1...2...3! Steve Hebert: He did it! Dan Black did it! Not only does he get to do whatever the hell he wants with the Purity and Lust Titles; but he also gets the very first crack at the Impulse Title! I knew it! I told you he'd do it! What a way to start off Illusions 2007. Hell, what a way to start Halloween night! If all goes according to plan, this is going to be an awesome night! My god yes, I can feel it. Lex Robinson: Eh, calm down, Steve. Yes, Dan Black wins; and yes, he gets the first shot at the Impulse Title. However, he seems to be up to something within the ring... Standing above Mark Davis's fallen body, Dan Black smiles from ear-to-ear and then picks his defeated opponent up. Mouthing some awful words to him, Dan kicks Mark in the gut and again places him in a standing headscissors position. Lex Robinson: No! He can't do that! This match is over! What is he thinking?! Mark Davis is lifted onto Dan Black's shoulders in a crucifix-powerbomb position. Charging forward, like an angry bull, Dan Black throws Mark Davis out of the ring, sending him body sailing through the air, eventually crashing through a table near the ringside area! Lex Robinson: My God! Dan Black just flung Mark Davis through the air and put him through that table! Steve Hebert: Haha, awesome. Lex Robinson: That no-good bully! That's all he is! Couldn't he be happy that he gets the first Impulse Title shot? Steve Hebert: Let's just say that Dan Black is leaving his mark; and making that "Mark" think twice about ever messing with him. I mean, he broke Dan Black's thumb, for Christ's sake! Lex Robinson: Meh... things had to be done. Steve Hebert: And Dan Black had to do things, too. Get with the program, Lex, and open your eyes. Victorious, Dan Black holds his right hand into the air, getting a loud jeer from the fans. He exits the ring and walks to the back, whereas Mark Davis remains in between the pieces of the table, in a dubious amount of pain. Winner: Dan Black

The scene shifts to the backstage area, inside of Corey Page's office, to be more exact. The scene remains darkened, creating a gloomy appearance and atmosphere, until the lens finally zooms in on Corey Page, who is dressed up as a gypsy. Corey Page: Hello, welcome to the 2007 edition of Illusions, the spookiest pay per view of the year! The lights flicker off and on. Corey Page: ...Yeah, that was pretty fucking lame. Corey flings off his gypsy hat, but keeps the crystal ball in front of him. Corey Page: Anyhow, to get to the point. Tonight, I come to announce something big... I come to announce the teams of the upcoming Tag Trophy Tournament! Not only that, but I come with information on the final event of 2007! Again, the lights flicker on and off, trying to create a spooky feeling. Corey Page: My God, someone stop that. The lights then flicker off. Corey Page: Much better. Again, he fixes himself up. Corey Page: First, the final event of 2007. You'll be finding out more information about this as the weeks go by; but right now, I'm here to announce the main event... sort of. He pauses for a moment. Corey Page: There will be 2 teams; 3 people to a team. There will be a team captain for each team. For the weeks leading up to the event, they will announce one partner week-by-week, until all 6 people are named. The point of the match is to eliminate the opposing team... and when that's done, the match then begins an elimination match, lasting until one person is left standing. So, you may start off teaming with your partner of choice; but in the end, you may have to fight them, as well. The faux-gypsy then reaches out, grabbing onto two pictures. Corey Page: And the team captain for the first team is... He holds up a picture... Corey Page: Congratulations, Chris Carson, you're the team captain of your team! As for the team captain of the other team, here goes... This time, Corey holds up a differing picture. Corey Page: Well, looky here; it's Morgana! Like I said, each week you will choose your partner, but remember to choose wisely. Grabbing both pictures, he then tosses them into a bag. Corey Page: Now, onto announcement numero dos. Grabbing the crystal ball in front of him, he begins predicting... Corey Page: I predict that the team members for the first match for the Tag Trophy will be announced right here, right now, by me! The crystall ball is thrown overheard, smashing it on the floor. Corey Page: Pay attention because your name may be called, assholes... He begins shaking the bag, finishing when he thinks things are shook up enough. Reaching inside, he pulls out a picture of a performer; followed by another. Corey Page: Well, eat my cock. Look who we've got here... Two pictures are held up... Corey Page: Your first team announced in the SW Tag Trophy Tournament consists of Sebastian York and Stevie Swing. These two have come to know each other very well these past few weeks. How interesting this will be. He puts the pictures aside, shakes the bag once more and then reaches inside. Corey Page: They will be taking on the team consisting of... Again, he removes two pictures. His eyes widen and he looks very pleased... Corey Page: Not bad. Not bad at all. Adora and Stevie are facing each other tonight, even! This is cocktastic. For the very first match in the Tag Trophy Tournament, we have Sebastian York and Stevie Swing taking on the team of Adora and Declan Turner! Corey Page sits silently at his desk. Corey Page: ...Are we done yet? I want to get this ridiculous costume off. I feel like Ryan Ford here. SUMMAH TIME. Yes, I know, it's stupid. ...What? We're still rolling? Well, it's so dark in here, how am I supposed to know these things? Jesus Christ. ...And the image flashes out.

Singles Match "Carry On" by Burn Season starts to play as Lance Ryder heads out to the stage. He looks at the ring, as if it has his total and complete attention. He walks straight to the ring, slapping some fan's hands, sometimes even lifting up a child and pointing at it. After a little interaction, he makes it to the ring and waits for his opponent. Lex Robinson: Up next, we have Lance Ryder taking on Jantz Spalding. These two are fairly new to the ranks of Sin Wrestling and they're both looking to make a name for themselves. Two Impulses ago, it was Jantz Spalding that got the victory over Lance Ryder; and at the last Impulse, it was Lance Ryder that lead to the defeat of Jantz, who was defeated by Vincent Kane. Steve Hebert: So wait, who are these two again? LeX Robinson: Nevermind. "Stupify" by Disturbed hits and "The Naturalist" Jantz Spalding walks out from the backstage area, where he then walks towards the ring and slides inside. Steve Hebert: Well, that was an interesting entrance from... uh... what's his name? Lex Robinson: Jantz Spalding; we've been over this. He's been on the past several cards. You should know this. Steve Hebert: Listen here, I have ADHD, you don't tell me what to --- hey, a penny. Lex Robinson: Sigh. Someone ring the bell. Lance Ryder doesn't turn away from Jantz Spalding, as the bell rings and the two men lock-up. Right away, Lance applies a wristlock, but that gets reversed by Jantz, who turns the hold into a hammerlock. Lex Robinson: A nice reversal by Jantz Spalding starts this match off. Looking for an opening, Lance tries to elbow Jantz, but misses. Steve Hebert: Hey, I just notice their names rhymed! What a coincidence! It's like we've entered bizarro world. Lex Robinson: What an amazing discovery, Steve. Steve Hebert: Why, thank you! Lex Robinson: Tucking beneath his legs, Lance grabs onto Jantz's leg and trips him up. He attempts a figure-four, but Jantz is way too keen to let that happen. Wisely, Jantz literally kicks Lance's behind, pushing him into the ropes. On his rebound, Lance runs right into a monkey-flip from Jantz, who hops back up, only to clothesline Lance right back down. Steve Hebert: My God, this Lance character sucks shit. Lex Robinson: He is a tad unorthodox, that's for certain. Some say that his sanity is not quite there, either. Steve Hebert: He seems like a goddamn retard to me. Lex Robinson: Eh, to each his own. Lance rises, trying to find an opening, but Jantz steps aside, only for Jantz to step in to him, apply a cobra-clutch and then suplexes him back with a corba-clutch suplex! Rolling through with the hold, keeping the cobra-clutch applied, Jantz hastily barrel-rolls Lance, so that he is up on his shoulders and quickly turns it into a Samoan Drop! Lex Robinson: Jantz Spalding is all over Lance Ryder, who has no other choice but to try and exit the ring. Steve Hebert: What an old pussy. LeX Robinson: Lance tries to roll out, but Jantz hurries up to him, grabs onto his tights and halts him from exiting. Jantz opts to lift Lance up, punch him in the skull and Irish-whips him into the ropes. As Lance rebounds, he is lifted into the air with a military press from Jantz! Steve Hebert: Which is then dropped into a powerslam! I admit it, I'm sort of impressed. Lex Robinson: At least now you'll remember his name. Steve Hebert: It's Steve, isn't it? Lex Robinson: No! Shut up! Dazed, Lance Ryder attempts to stand, while Jantz Spalding steps back, amused at Lance's efforts. With nothing else to do, Jantz steps in, knees Lance in the head, double-underarms him and hits a DDT that he calls "Instant Reality"! Lex Robinson: Wow! That's his move! He hit that pretty quickly! Steve Hebert: Well, what else is he supposed to do? Lance is sucking up the place! Lex Robinson: Jantz rolls over onto Lance Ryder, demanding that the referee count. The referee obviously obliges. The count is made... ...1...2...3! Steve Hebert: Well Jesus, that was pretty easy... for Jantz, that is. Lex Robinson: Seriously. He stands to his feet, dusts his hands off, gives Lance Ryder a thumbs-down and exits the ring. Steve Hebert: It's all in a day's work for your friendly neighbourhood Jantz Spalding. After the match, Jantz exits the ring and walks to the back, leaving a dazed and confused Lance Ryder defeated in the ring. Winner: Jantz Spalding

Nikita walks into the arena, decked out in Halloween spirit. She's wearing a tight, army green blouse with the sleeves neatly rolled up to her biceps and buttoned in place, tucked into a wide belt around her waist. Below that, plain, tight, army green booty shorts and black combat boots. Her jet black hair is pulled back into a bun. Then she bumps into Ace Rodgers. Ace Rodgers: Nikita! Last year you resorted to egging people and their locker rooms for not giving you candy. Do you have any eggs this year? Nikita: I've moved way past eggs, Ace. Now, I'm just kicking people's asses for not giving me candy. Ace's eyes dart nervously before Nikita stomps towards him, making him fly back a few feet in terror. He then digs deep into his pockets and throws handfuls of candy at Nikita before running away. Proud of herself, Nikita scoops up the candy and continues on her merry way.

The scene opens up backstage, depicting Morgana dressed as Sailor Moon yet again, and Adora as her namesake, She-Ra, Princess of Power. Each wifey is holding two large pumpkins in her hands -- with several more stacked in a filthy wheelbarrow next to them. They are standing in front of a locker room that is clearly labeled as "The Creep" Chris Carson's. Morgana: Okay, here's the plan. We go into The Creep's locker room, smash these pumpkins, and ruin all his shit. Adora: Can we leave him some razor blade-filled candy, too? Morgana: Why yes! Barging into The Creep's locker room, Morgana surveys the surroundings, satisfied that it's completely empty. In moments, Adora steers the wheelbarrow into the room and shuts the door. Morgana: Woohoo! Let's get started. Picking up the pumpkins one at a time, Morgy and Adora smash them on every surface: the floors, the couches, a coffee table and all over The Creep's things. Morgy picks of a handful of slimy pumpkin innards and smears it all over the walls, then shoves a fistful into The Creep's duffel bag, where he presumably kept his ring attire. Morgana: Eat shit, you stupid pig of a man! Leaving a disaster area of smashed pumpkins and orange ooze behind them, the wifeys exit the locker room and cackle as the scene fades to black.

The camera switches to Declan Turner, who is arriving in the backstage area. He looks ready for his match against his ex-wife, when he bumps into Sin Wrestling owner, Corey Page, who seems to have been looking for Declan. Corey Page: Ah-ha! There you are. I've been looking for you. Corey, who is still dressed like a gypsy, taps Declan on the shoulder, getting his full attention. Declan Turner: Hey, I've got a match... Corey Page: Uh, actually... no, you don't. Your bitch of an ex-wife... well, she hasn't shown up. I have no idea why... and I have no idea where she is. As a result, you can't go out there. Declan Turner: So, I'm being kept off the show? You've got to be kidding me. Corey Page: Hey, don't blame me. Blame your bitch of an ex. My god, she truly is a giant cunt. If I were you, I would have drowned the bitch long ago. Grabbing an apple with a razorblade in it, Corey walks off, still grumbling about the fact that Declan cannot go on tonight. Declan, meanwhile, looks even more upset; thanks to his wife, he is being left off the card for tonight.

Before the upcoming match, the camera switches to the backstage area, where Stevie Swing prances into a locker-room, wearing a "Stevie Swing is my Idol" t-shirt. He... uh... wait, that's not Stevie Swing. "Stevie Swing": FO SHO! That's Chris Staggs! Chris Staggs, who is dressed up as his idol, Stevie Swing, for Halloween walks into his idol's own locker-room. Standing before him is the real Stevie Swing, who acts shocked... as if he were looking in some sort of weird, twisted mirror. After placing his jaw into proper position, he inspects Chris Staggs, who stands before Stevie, having a wide, cheesy grin on his face, while giving him a thumbs up. Chris Staggs: Hiya, Stevie! Stevie says nothing, as Staggs cheerfully waves to him. Chris Staggs: Boy, you seem crappy today. You need to cheer up; it's Halloween! Staggs pulls some candy out from his pockets and throws it at Stevie... who doesn't catch it. Chris Staggs: Well damn, you don't like candies, eh? Staggs then picks the candies up and eats them. Chris Staggs: Tastes good -- FO SHO! Shaking his head, Stevie continues to say nothing. In the meantime, Chris Staggs stands back up, pats Stevie across the back, wishing him good luck. Chris Staggs: Well, Stevie, I got a match tonight, too. In fact, it's right now. Good luck, Stevie, old buddy, old pal. I know that kick you gave me last week was purely accidental. I saw your foot slip. Stevie winces, not believing what Chris Staggs is sputtering out. Chris Staggs: Good luck against Adora, Stevie. And you can wish me good luck in my match, too. Staggs waits for an answer. Stevie Swing: Uh... go get 'em, Hank. Chris Staggs: Haha, you're the man, Stevie. Chris "Stevie Swing" Staggs joyfully walks away, ready to try and win the Impulse Title. Stevie Swing, alternatively, simply stands, scratching his head, possibly not even knowing what just talked to him.

Impulse Title Match The lights dim the arena as blue strobes begin to flash, and the following image flashes across the screen: The strobes continue as the heavy riffs of "Sold Me" kick in, and eventually the riffs soften and vocals filter in... Here I stand before myself... Blue spotlight shines down, revealing Shane Donovan standing on the stage, a smug look on his face as he walks to the ring. The light follows him as he makes his way around the ring itself, sneering and taunting fans before taking off his jacket and tossing it into the crowd. He then slides into the ring as the lights return to normal. Lex Robinson: Making his return to Sin Wrestling is Shane Donovan! This is his first match back. After seeing the inclusion of Vincent Kane, he immediately bounded to the SW offices and demanded to be put into this match. Steve Hebert: You know, those guys just need to get together and give each other a hug. We can't have them warring with each other. We just can't. It's awful. It's like having your family beat each other up, which I'm sure you know much about, Lex. Lex Robinson: Eh? FO SHO! "ABC" By The Jackson 5 begins to blare over the PA system and out comes Chris Staggs, wearing a "Stevie Swing Is My Role Model" tee-shirt. Chris Staggs starts to do the toosie-roll; while Aron Swinger and Mr. Feeney stand behind him. Finally, Mr. Feeney and Aron Swinger point him towards the ring, which Chris Staggs obliges and starts doing the running man down the ramp, toward the ring. As they reach the ring, Chris Staggs slides inside and gets to his feet, whereas Mr. Feeney and Aron Swinger climb in. Chris Staggs starts doing the twist, encouraging both Aron Swinger and Mr. Feeney to do it, just as the song ends. With the song over, Mr. Feeney and Aron Swinger exit the ring, allowing the match to start. Steve Hebert: Oh God, not this idiot. This moron probably doesn't even know how to spell his own name. Lex Robinson: That guy you're insulting is the current -- and final -- Lust Champion. Steve Hebert: Ugh. It starts so great with Vincent Kane; but ends so horribly with Chris Staggs. Makes me want to puke. Lex Robinson: I think we may have some fake-vomit here beneath the table. Sebastian York walks out as "Can't tell me Nothing" by Kanye West begins to blast throughout the arena. Stopping to take a look at the crowd, he smiles and then saunters to the ring, slapping hands with the fans as he makes his way to the squared circle. Finally, he reaches the ring, and slides in, waiting for the bell to ring. Lex Robinson: Speaking of current champions, here's the current Purity Champion, Sebastian York! Steve Hebert: He's a nice looking woman. Lex Robinson: Uh... Steve Hebert: Hmmm... yes? Lex Robinson: He's not... actually, you know, nevermind. Steve Hebert: Good. The lights dim and a red hue drapes over the arena. The sirens in the beginning of "Straight Hate" by Bloodsimple can be heard faintly for a moment, until the song begins and the hate and anger pours from the PA system. The crowd is silenced, or so it seems from the deafening roar of the lyrical massacre. "There's something up with the FATAL ATTRACTION." The red spotlight moves from panning the crowd to shining towards the entrance, where Vincent Kane steps out from the back, his arms raised high in the air, fists clenched, and walking to the ring in a fluid motion. The fan's reaction is still silenced by the music and it's impossible to tell if they love or hate the man. However, he acknowledges them, trying to get them into the moment. "For every action there's an opposite reaction. It's like a trip to the brain that drives me FUCKIN INSANE!" Vincent Kane uses the steps to enter the ring, but he paces around, outside of the ropes, doing almost a full lap around the ring. Throwing his fist into the air and obviously trying to pump up the crowd, he goes to enter... "You never had a chance anyway.." Vincent Kane finally steps through the ropes, as the music dies down, and you can finally hear the reaction from the crowd. Vincent just faintly smiles, as he steps to his corner, and props himself against the turnbuckles. Steve Hebert: There he is. Stab wound and all, it's Vincent Kane. Before the bell can ring, Shane Donovan propels from his corner and instantly attacks Vincent Kane, ravaging him with a series of rights and lefts, even clotheslining both himself and Vincent over the top rope and out to the floor. Lex Robinson: Here we go. There's the bell. The match is on! Steve Hebert: Jesus, out here, Shane and Vincent exchange punches and chops. In due time, though, it's Vincent Kane that obtains the upper-hand, allowing him to swat at Shane Donovan with some punches of his own. He even grabs Shane's head and bashes it off the ring railing. Lex Robinson: And this happens while Chris "Stevie Swing" Staggs and Sebastian York lock-up. Staggs, who is dressed exactly like his idol, Jewish nose and all, is backed against the ropes, after headlocking Sebastian York. Sebastian soon pushes Chris Staggs outward, throwing him into the ropes. Sebastian York bounces back, but has Chris Staggs leapfrog up-and-over him. Spinning around, Sebastian York connects with a kick to Staggs, just as he turns around. Deciding to bounce off the nearest set of ropes, Sebastian York storms out, hitting a clothesline to Chris Staggs, who immediately pops right back up. Steve Hebert: How can you talk about those two in the ring, when Shane Donovan and Vincent Kane are beating the hell out of each other on the floor?! Shane and Vincent are right in front of us now, too. Vincent has his faced bashed off our table -- oh why! Lex Robinson: As of now, we have two matches going -- one inside the ring; the other one outside. Steve Hebert: And the one outside is much more interesting. Lex Robinson: I beg to differ. In the ring, Chris Staggs blocks an incoming Sebastian York attack by taking him over with two-straight armdrags, finishing off with a hip-toss. Seeing Sebastian laid out on the canvas, Chris Staggs goes to drop an elbow, but misses, as the Purity Champ rolls to the side. Steve Hebert: See? Chris Staggs can't even hit the simplest of moves! Lex Robinson: Sebastian York instantly pops back up, allowing him to kick, stomp and knee Vincent Kane. He lifts Chris Staggs up, whips him into the ropes and catches him upon the rebound with a running reverse-bulldog! After this, he immediately picks Chris Staggs up at hits him with a fisherman's buster! Steve Hebert: These douchebags are beating the hell out of each other, when Shane and Vincent should be teaming up to take those douchebags down. Instead, they won't stop brawling on the floor. Lex Robinson: Go figure. They're two egomaniacs, anyhow. Delivering a kneedrop to Chris Staggs's skull, Sebastian York is fast to pick him back up and to throw him into the corner. In here, Sebastian strikes Chris with a few punches to the jaw, and then sits on the top turnbuckle, looking to hit a Tornado DDT. Lex Robinson: Sebastian York has a facelock applied. He swings out, looking for a DDT... only to have Chris Staggs push him off. Landing on his feet, Sebastian York storms into the corner, looking to avenge this missed opportunity, but Chris Staggs sees him coming. Steve Hebert: That idiot, Chris Staggs, even ducks down and hoists Sebastian up... Lex Robinson: Actually, he hits a bridging Northern Lights suplex! Chris Staggs has a pinfall attempt on Sebastian York! Seeing this, the referee makes the count. ...1...2... Lex Robinson: Noticing the action inside of the ring, Shane Donovan turns around, reaches in and pulls Chris Staggs off Sebastian York! The match goes on. Steve Hebert: What a brilliant move by Shane Donovan. I told you he's smart, Lex. Unlike that moron, Chris Staggs, who has an extra 21st chromosome. Lex Robinson: Getting onto the ring apron, Shane grab hold of a disturbed Chris Staggs, yanks on his head and then guillotine-chokes him across the top rope! Steve Hebert: Hah! Another brilliant move! Lex Robinson: Moments after dropping to his feet on the floor, Shane Donovan slithers back inside, cradles Chris Staggs and begins punching at his head. However, he doesn't notice Sebastian York rising to his feet. Steve Hebert: Aw, crap. Lex Robinson: Delivering a boot to the head, Sebastian frees Chris Staggs... only to start stomping on Staggs himself! Steve Hebert: Hah. It's every man, woman and retard for themselves, Lex. Lex Robinson: You'd think Sebastian would go after Shane, though! Steve Hebert: Pfffft. Lex Robinson: This allows Shane Donovan to get to his feet behind Sebastian York, wrap his arms around his waist and then fling him overhead with a release German suplex! Holy shit, Sebastian York landed on the top of his head! Steve Hebert: "Holy shit" is right. However, in comes Vincent Kane, now. Lex Robinson: You're right. Instinctively, Vincent Kane goes right at Shane Donovan, who notices him coming, thereby giving him the chance to duck beneath a glistening running forearm. Going behind Vincent, Shane again locks his arms around his opponent's waist -- this time, it's Vincent Kane. Steve Hebert: Are you trying to imply something, Lex? Are you trying to imply that Shane Donovan likes giving hugs? Lex Robinson: Uhm, no. But he sure could use one. Especially right now, as Vincent Kane battles his way out of the hold, thanks to some unsung elbows to the face. Maneuvering around, so that Vincent is now behind Shane, Vincent grabs onto Shane Donovan's right arm, elbows it a few times and then gives him an armbar-bulldog onto the canvas! Applying as much pressure to the arm, shoulder and elbow as possible, Vincent Kane pulls back, wanting Shane to tap. Steve Hebert: That fucking 'tard, Chris Staggs breaks it up, though! Walking over, he calmly and collective kicks Vincent Kane in the face, stopping the submission attempt. Lex Robinson: That was actually pretty smart. Remember, it's first-fall wins. Steve Hebert: Like fuck it was smart. Smart and Chris Staggs don't go together. It's like saying Chris Extreme and gentle hugs go together. It's just not right! Lex Robinson: Having kicked Vincent Kane in the face, Chris Staggs hoists him up, only to then suplex him out of the ring, resulting in Vincent Kane spilling out to the floor! This leaves Staggs sauntering around Shane Donovan, where he then lifts him up, scoops him into the air and body slams him down. Bouncing off the adjacent set of ropes, Chris Staggs hopes to respond by hitting another move on Shane D... but is cut-off with a seated-dropkick from Sebastian York! Steve Hebert: That dropkick connects against Staggs's leg, toppling him over, bringing him down onto his stomach. Right away, Sebastian York tries to rollup that idiot, with some sort of move. Lex Robinson: It's a Majistral Cradle, to be more exact! And he has it wrapped up on Chris Staggs... The referee counts... ...1...2... Steve Hebert: Thank Zod! Shane Donovan crawls over and clobbers Sebastian York with a stiff forearm-drop! Lex Robinson: Thank Emperor Zod? Steve Hebert: You get the idea. Shane Donovan hurriedly gets to his feet, picking Sebastian York up with him. Striking with some kicks, Shane Donovan positions Sebastian into a standing-headscissors and then attempts to lift him up into a powerbomb/piledriver position, but Sebastian York wanes and shifts his balance. Lex Robinson: Frustrated by his inability to hoist Sebastian York up, Shane Donovan unloads with a barrage of kneelifts and double-axehandle blows to the back. All of these shots force Sebastian, the Purity Champion, into the corner, where Sebastian is then faced with plenty of kicks and punches. Steve Hebert: In the meantime, Vincent Kane is sliding back inside. He comes up behind Shane Donovan, halting him from punching Sebastian York. He turns Shane around and then strikes with a punch of his own! Lex Robinson: Stunned, Shane turns around... only to receive a punch from Sebastian York, who looks to make his way out from the corner! Steve Hebert: Agh... Shane turns around and walks into another forearm shot from Vincent Kane! Lex Robinson: European Uppercut from Sebastian York to Shane Donovan, who then walks right into a kick to the gut from Chris Staggs! Steve Hebert: It just goes from bad-to-worse. Lex Robinson: Next, Chris Staggs double-underarms Shane Donovan, about to bring him over... Steve Hebert: Just as that happens, though, Sebastian York finally removes himself from the corner, hitting a superkick to the butt of Chris Staggs's chin, allowing Shane to jack-knife roll him up into a pinfall! C'mon... The referee counts, while Shane tries to hold down Chris Staggs's legs... ...1...2... Lex Robinson: Vincent Kane pulls Shane Donovan off Chris Staggs, stopping the count at two! Steve Hebert: Son of a... Will these two shitheads please get along?! Lex Robinson: In a rush, Shane gets back to his feet and begins exchanging more smacks with Vincent Kane! But not before Sebastian York can move in, grab onto both men's head and headbutt them together! Left in a daze, Shane and Vincent stand, trying to retain their footing, unable to stop Sebastian York from bouncing off the ropes. Speeding ahead, Sebastian focuses on the two men that stand before him... Steve Hebert: Oh Christ, he hits a leaping clothesline, knocking both Shane and Vincent down! He stands right back up, lifting Vincent Kane up with him, and then suplexes him onto Shane Donovan! Ugh, he even covers Shane... ...1...2... Lex Robinson: Shane Donovan kicks out, though! He decides to cover Vincent Kane, instead... Steve Hebert: Oh Jesus... ...1...2... Lex Robinson: Vincent Kane kicks out! ...So, Sebastian covers Shane, again! Steve Hebert: What the Christ? ....1...2... Lex Robinson: Yet again, Shane Donovan kicks out. Frustrated at the consecutive lack of pinfalls, Sebastian York rises to his feet, focusing solely on Vincent Kane, who had been sitting up. Delivering a kick to the back of Vincent's head, Sebastian lifts him to his feet and then holds him up into a vertical suplex position. Lex Robinson: Thinking quickly, Vincent Kane knees Sebastian York in the head, prompting him to be dropped onto his feet. He charges at York, who drops down, resulting in a recharged Shane Donovan to capture Vincent with a leaping forearm to the face! Steve Hebert: Aw, crap. Lex Robinson: Latching onto that same arm, which had been driven into the mat earlier, Sebastian brings Shane Donovan down with a flying-armbar, watching as Vincent Kane stumbles out of the ring. Pulling hard on Shane's arm, Sebastian looks for a submission, but gets nothing, as Chris Staggs stumbles into the scene and stomps on Sebastian's chest, breaking the hold. Steve Hebert: Okay, so maybe the retard isn't so retarded, after all. Lex Robinson: Plucking Sebastian York to his feet, Chris Staggs holds the Purity Champ up onto his shoulders, looking for what seems to be a Samoan Drop. However, before completing this move, Sebastian York slips out, spins Staggs around and knees him in the gut! He then positions him into a suplex, while hooking the leg. He hits "The Hunger", one of his finishing moves! Steve Hebert: Uh ohs. Lex Robinson: Still with the leg hooked, Sebastian makes the pinfall... ...1...2... Lex Robinson: No! Shane Donovan grabs onto Sebastian's foot, pulls him, thus halting the count! Steve Hebert: Phew! Angered at this pinfall interruption, Sebastian York rises to his feet, staring hard at Shane Donovan, who retorts by striking with a stiff punch to the jaw. In return, Sebastian strikes with some fists of his own and both men begin to actively exchange shots. Steve Hebert: Oh dear, here we go. They're punching each other in the head. Let's you and I do this. Lex Robinson: Let's not. Steve Hebert: Shane Donovan gains the upper-hand, un-prettying that handsome face of Sebastian York. He even ducks beneath a return shot from Sebastian, who is then hoisted up into a back-suplex position. Lex Robinson: But Sebastian York doesn't like this, as he unloads with a flurry of punches to Shane Donovan's skull! Wisely, he falls to the ground and flips Shane over with a headlock-takedown! They both rise, again, with Shane charging right into a kick-to-the-gut from Sebastian, who then holds Shane up with a vertical suplex! Steve Hebert: God, but that metrosexual faggot throws Shane Donovan forward, hitting a front-face suplex! Poor Shane, he's been dropped on his face. How I wish it were Sebastian York and his pretty face, instead. Lex Robinson: Moving to the side, Sebastian leg-scissors Shane's arm and applies a crossface, with the fans firmly on his side! With the chants faovring Sebastian York, he tries his hardest to make Shane Donovan tap, but Shane is keen enough to find an escape. Leaning towards the side, he finds an opening, where he is able to shift the balance and sprawl atop Sebastian York, using a pinfall of his own. Lex Robinson: Shane Donovan sneaks his way to safety. Hell, he has rolled Sebastian into a pinning predicament! ...1... Lex Robinson: One... ...2... Lex Robinson: ...two... Steve Hebert: Bah! Damnit! He kicks out! Lex Robinson: Just in the nick of time! Steve Hebert: They both stand at approximately the same time, though... Lex Robinson: And they charge at each other, too. Steve Hebert: Shane throws a vicious lariat at Sebastian York's head; but the metrosexual ducks, prompting Shane Donovan to quickly turn around and kick his ass. Fuck yeah! Lex Robinson: Damn right. Shane kicks Sebastian in the kidneys, followed by a knee. He then sets him up for a Vertebreaker... Steve Hebert: That's one of Shane's favorite moves, too! Dangled upside-down, Sebastian kicks and squirms, allowing him to backflip out of Shane's clutches. Standing behind Shane, he gives him a great shove... Lex Robinson: Getting to safety, Sebastian lands on his feet and then pushes Shane forward. Steve Hebert: As a result, he bumps into that bumbling idiot, Chris Staggs! My God, he is good for nothing. Lex Robinson: Thanks to Chris Staggs getting in the way, Shane Donovan stumbles back, only to walk right into Sebastian York grabbing onto him and then heaving him over the top rope, where he knocks Vincent Kane down like a bowling pin! Lex Robinson: Ironically, the only two people left in the ring right now is Sebastian York and Chris Staggs, who stumbles around, holding his head, fresh off smacking it against Shane Donovan's noggin'. Steve Hebert: He walks right into a kick from Sebastian York, too. Ugh. That dummy. Lex Robinson: For the second time, Sebastian York hits "The Hunger"! He rolls right over, keeping Chris Staggs's leg hooked...! The referee follows suit and starts the count... ...1...2... Lex Robinson: One... two... Steve Hebert: Shane Donovan rolls into the ring... ...3! Lex Robinson: But it's too late! The three is made! Sebastian York is your very first Impulse Champion! Steve Hebert: Fuck! Hearing the bell ring and his music playing, Sebastian York releases his grip on Chris Staggs and sits up, soaking up his victory. Seconds later, the referee rewards him with the Impulse Title, which he graciously accepts, much to the joy of the fans, who get to their feet and cheer for Sebastian. Steve Hebert: That makes me sick. If Shane and Vincent had been on the same page, one of them could be walking away with that title, but no. We're left with that old metrosexual. Lex Robinson: Well, I think it's great. It's about time that Sebastian York gets to actually hold the title. Unlike with the old Purity Title, which had been stolen. And look at it, it's all new and shiny. It's nice. Steve Hebert: It has the image of a gladiator on it. It's gay. Gay, gay, gay. Gay like Sebastian York. Gay! Lex Robinson: I digress. Steve Hebert: But of course. The image shows Sebastian York standing alone in the ring, holding his newfound title high, while Shane Donovan walks around the outside, yelling and roaring at Vincent Kane, who remains down on the floor. Chris Staggs, meanwhile, continues to stumble around on the outside, getting a few pats on the back. Winner: Sebastian York

The sound of muttering, groaning and grunting can be heard, as Chris Extreme is shown walking aimlessly around the backstage area, sans a costume. Trailing behind him is Booger, who is dressed up like a giant snot, and his dog, Roscue, who is dressed up as a hamburger. Chris slaps his hands off his head, trying to think of something, but the light bulb just does not come on. Chris Extreme: Goddamnit, that goddamn whore! I just wanted to be a Wifey, again! Is that so wrong? I just wanted to be a filthy fucking whore and fuck myself silly! What's wrong with that, huh? Fuck! Booger shrugs his shoulders, while Roscoe wags his tails and hangs his tongue out of his mouth. Chris looks down at the dog, nodding his head, smiling brightly. Chris Extreme: Hmmm... you're right, Roscoe! That is a good idea! Booger: What? Chris Extreme: Shut your fat niggerlips. This is all your fault I'm in this predicament... that I have no costume. Booger: You can have my costume! Chris Extreme: I'd rather hang myself than look like you. Besides, Roscoe gave me a good idea. I'll dress up as the most vile, disgusting, horrifying thing, ever... Chris pulls a can of black facepaint out of his white boxers. Chris Extreme: I will dress up as Dontam Dyce! Winds whistle and ghosts howl at the name that hasn't been mentioned in years. Turning around, Chris tells one random ghost to shut the fuck up; and he does. Chris Extreme: Christ, it's like some sort of haunted plantation here. Let's get the fuck out of here. Facepaint and all, Chris Extreme dodges out of the scene, followed by Booger, who grabs Roscoe and places him in his mouth. Letting out a squeal, Roscoe claws at Booger and runs away, not wanting to be eaten.

Television Title Match -- Falls Count Anywhere "Plastic" by Basia Lyjak hits and Adora promptly emerges from backstage, carrying her Television Title over her right shoulder. Stuff and shit happens, and poop flies. The end. Steve Hebert: An entrance like no other, Lex! Lex Robinson: Tell me about it, not only does stuff and shit happen but poop flies! Steve Hebert: Lex, you really don't need to be that detailed about your sex life. Lex Robinson: What? Action Action's "Don't Cut Your Fabric" hits, and Stevie Swing slowly walks out to face the crowd. In his hand is a cigarette, which he takes one last puff from, before flicking it into the crowd. Around his neck is a collar with a leash going back to Stevie's manager/master, Gail/Breeze. Head trip on the scene again pumping in the veins of the rabid mouths to feed. Head back, obsolete... trapped with the secrets that I can not keep today. Stevie breaks into a loose shuffle as the fans taunt him, chanting "emo-fag!", as Stevie’s bondage pants stop him from fully busting out. Swing makes it to the ring and is unclipped from his leash. He rolls into the ring... You got it Intrusive Erotic Elusive Your heart aches Infliction Sporadic in an aging contradiction Stevie Swing adjusts his arm bracelets and goes to the corner, where he dances around a little bit, but nothing too much while Gail/Breeze screams in the background. The crowd try to drown her out with their booing, but Swing ignores it all, just waiting for the match to start. Steve Hebert: Well, it's nice to know that Stevie Swing has dressed up for Halloween. Lex Robinson: Actually... Steve Hebert: I mean, it's great he's in the spirit. Lex Robinson: Uhm... Steve Hebert: It's for the kids, you know. The bell rings and Adora bounces off the ropes and charges at Stevie Swing. Lex Robinson: Anyhow...! Adora with a running clothesline! Stevie Swing ducks! Steve Hebert: Disco ducks! Lex Robinson: Adora bounces off the far ropes and charges at Stevie again! Swing leaps! Steve Hebert: Disco ducks! Stevie leaps over Adora, but Adora stops in her tracks, turns around and catches Stevie Swing as he lands with a rear waistlock! With Adora in tow, Stevie runs at the ropes and slips his arms underneath the top rope to hold on. The momentum sends Adora tumbling backwards but she lands on her feet! Lex Robinson: What incredible agility shown this early in the... Steve Hebert: Wait a goddamn second... Lex Robinson: Before the crowd can applaud the fitness of the two competitors, Adora runs towards the corner, climbs the turnbuckles as if they were steps and leaps off the top rope, where she then grabs Stevie's hair, bouncing Stevie's throat off the top rope! Steve Hebert: That's so awful. Stevie clutches his throat and stumbles towards the middle of the ring to regain his composure. Following this, Adora leaps onto the ring apron with a single jump. She uses the top rope to catapult herself into the ring as Stevie Swing turns around to face her! Stevie Swing ducks but Adora goes over him for a rolling sunset flip! Lex Robinson: Adora going for the early pinfall. Steve Hebert: Oh, fuck that! LeX Robinson: Stevie Swing stands on his own two feet; and instead, takes his fist to Adora's face below him! Stevie picks Adora off the mat and Irish-whips her to the corner with authority, as she bounces off the turnbuckles holding her back in pain. Steve Hebert: Good. Break the bitch's back. Lex Robinson: Stevie kicks the back of Adora's left knee to drop her to one knee. He runs to the opposite turnbuckle and charges full speed ahead as he connects with a shining wizard kick to the side of Adora's head! Steve Hebert: Pow! He really should cover her, or something. With Adora dazed, Stevie grabs her by the legs to bring her closer to the corner. He slides out of the ring and grabs both her feet, as he yanks her to the outside, giving her a crushing blow to her vagina thanks to the steel post! Steve Hebert: Great. Now I'm turned on. Lex Robinson: Ouch! That's gotta hurt! Steve Hebert: I'm curious, Lex. How do you know that hurts? Is there something you're not telling me? Are you equipped with ovaries? Stevie Swing grabs Adora's left knee and swings it at the steel post once! Twice! Thrice! Whatever the term is for four times! Still not done with the punishment, Stevie Swing crosses her left leg around the post and over her right. He interlaces his own as he locks in a figure four leglock around the steel post! Steve Hebert: Die Wifeys, die! Lex Robinson: Oh my god! The wifey can't escape! Come on ref, this is an illegal move! Steve Hebert: Falls count anywhere, Lex. No DQ! Come on ref, she's tapping out! Call the match! Falls count anywhere includes inside the ring, numbnuts! Lex Robinson: It's a Falls count anywhere match not a submissions count anywhere match, Steve! Adora eventually stops tapping out and just passes out from the pain instead. Realizing Adora's knocked out cold, Stevie releases the leg lock and slides into the ring. He stands next to the referee and raises his arms in victory. The referee doesn't acknowledge it, however. Lex Robinson: I think Stevie thinks he won. Steve Hebert: I think you think Stevie thinks he's won because he's raising his hands. But I think the referee thinks I think that you think Stevie thinks he's won because Adora's passed out. Lex Robinson: You're not cute. At all. Steve Hebert: Stop hitting on me, faggot. Lex Robinson: In the ring, the referee explains the match is to be won on a pinfall... Stevie is not hearing it, though, and orders the referee to call the match. The referee refuses and Stevie Swing stomps Adora in the clitoris, out of sheer frustration. The referee refuses to acknowledge Stevie has won the match and so Stevie Swing decides to punish Adora more. He rolls her outside of the ring, as she falls to the arena floor, busting her mouth open, but yet she still won't wake. He tosses her over the security rail and into the crowd. The fans disperse to give the two their space. Stevie Swing grabs a fans beer and throws it in Adora's face waking her up. Lex Robinson: The battle rages on -- into the fans, no less. Steve Hebert: C'mon, Steve, punch of them 'em in the face. Lex Robinson: Are you talking about the fans?! Steve Hebert: Hell yeah, I'm talking about those fans. As Adora awakens, Stevie nails her with a steel chair, knocking her out once again! He grabs her by the hair and leads her out of the arena and into the corridor. Once out in the hall he drags her to the condiments stand and smashes a jar of relish over her head! Lex Robinson: I thought Stevie and Adora were starting to resolve their issues... but he just dumped her face-first into relish! Steve Hebert: Hey, you gotta win, when you gotta win. LeX Robinson: Hmmph. Stevie reaches for a bottle of ketchup, but Adora wakes up again! As Stevie turns around with the bottle of ketchup hoisted above his head, Adora drops him face first with a drop toe hold! Steve Hebert: Oh nos! Stevie just landed face first in that bottle of ketchup! Lex Robinson: And now Stevie dons the crimson mask. That ketchup bottle did enough damage it should allow Adora to catch up. Steve Hebert: That was incredibly lame, even for you Lex. Where did you get your broadcasting license? Tony Star's School of Ring Announcing? With a sickly grin, Adora punches Stevie's face in; and it soon becomes impossible to distinguish between the ketchup and the blood flowing from Stevie's face. Adora opens wide and bite's Stevie Swing's forehead to make sure the wound cuts deeper. Steve Hebert: Get your mouth out of there, you filthy whore! You'll infect that cut! Lex Robinson: Steve, I'm impressed. Did you know a human bite is more infectuous than a dog bite? Steve Hebert: What the fuck are you talking about? I'm talking about that bitch Adora. Who knows where her mouth has been. We don't want Stevie turning into a zombie here. Lex Robinson: Eh... What blasphemy! Accusing Adora of being carnivorous... Steve Hebert: What can I say? The wifeys love the meat! The meat-loving wifey drags Stevie Swing into the men's restroom and nearly throws up from the stench as she walks in. Adora: All their lives, grabbing their dicks and men still don't know how to aim inside the urinal? Even I could pee straight in there! She Irish-whips Stevie Swing into the nearest urinal, forcing Stevie to stumble to his knees and lands head-first into the porcelain, shattering it to the floor. Steve Hebert: Someone's gonna have to pay for that! Lex Robinson: Meanwhile, Adora starts kicking the doors of the stalls open until she finds an occupant. Hi Booger. Booger: Oh, sorry. I had some bad mexican earlier. Lex Robinson: Yuck! God why?! Steve Hebert: I could eat a big bowl of Booger shit right now. Lex Robinson: This is awful. Holy Christ why. With his shorts around his ankles, Adora pulls Booger out of the stall, without so much giving him a chance to flush or wipe. Lex Robinson: It just gets worse! Steve Hebert: Tell me about it. Lex Robinson: Adora retrieves Stevie and leads him into the stall that Booger previously occupied and dumps him head first into the toilet. Steve Hebert: What a pile of shit! Lex Robinson: The most devastating move, ever! Way to go, Adora. The muffled screams of Stevie inside the white tank bring an evil smile to Adora's face that stretches from ear to ear. Blindly searching for the handle to flush, Stevie waves his arms frantically. Eventually Adora lets go and Stevie runs out of the bathroom and searches for a tub of ice to dip his head in. Lex Robinson: Right now, all indications are that Stevie Swing smells like shit! Steve Hebert: How dare you! Lex Robinson: I'm just going by what I just witnessed! Adora thinks quick and grabs an axe on the wall and swings it to break the glass and retrieve the emergency fire hose. She unrolls it and carries the heavy hose to where Stevie is. Steve Hebert: Now what?! Lex Robinson: A fan does Adora the favor of turning the hose on as she aims it at Stevie's face, knocking him off his feet. Not satisfied with having wash Stevie's face she follows him with the hose in hand and continues to spray his fallen body forcing him down the corridor, until they come across a Halloween display! Steve Hebert: Spooky! Lex Robinson: Picking up a cardboard headstone, Adora flings it at Stevie Swing, who ducks the shot; and instead picks up a fake skeleton and then heaves it towards the current Television Champ! Steve Hebert: Stevie even grabs a ghost and throws it at Adora! The ghost, of course, being a white sheet. Thanks to this, the sheet wraps around Adora's head, blinding her. This gives Stevie the chance to run up to her and push her over some pumpkins! Lex Robinson: Talk about finding an opening. Steve Hebert: Stevie picks up a pumpkin... and he throws it at Adora, who struggles to pull the sheet off her head. She's stumbling around, as if he she were some sort of manic ghost, Lex. Lex Robinson: While Adora struggles to take that white sheet off, Stevie Swing comes up behind her and rolls her up! With a schoolboy! Steve Hebert: Stevie Swing is rolling around with a schoolboy! LeX Robinson: No, I mean, it's a pinfall attempt! Steve Hebert: ...Oh. The referee sees this and starts the count. ...1...2... LeX Robinson: Adora kicks out, continuing the match! Steve Hebert: But that doesn't stop Stevie from standing to his feet. He walks over to a nearby table, grabs a bowl or eyes and stomps towards Adora. Lex Robinson: ...Eyes? Steve Hebert: That's what it looks like! Lex Robinson: Nevertheless, he dumps it over Adora, who has finally yanked the sheet off her head. To further the damage, he even smashes the bowl off Adora's head, splintering it into pieces! Steve Hebert: Good! Kill her! Standing over Adora, Stevie gives her a few kicks, stands back and waits for Adora to stand. Noticing that she is hanging over a tombstone, he calmly preys around her, waiting for her to turn around. Lex Robinson: Stevie Swing charges at Adora, sending his foot at her face, with the Last Dance Superkick! Steve Hebert: Argh! But she latches onto his foot! Lex Robinson: She spins him around, hoping to catch him upon turning around with a move of her own. However, this is quickly halted when Stevie immediately spins around and catches her with The Last Dance superkick! Steve Hebert: A little spinning never hurt anyone! That kick connects to her jaw, knocking her over the tombstone! He could have this match won right now! We're going to have a new champion! Lex Robinson: But he's not covering her! Instead, he's decidingto grab a pumpkin... what the hell? Steve Hebert: I have no idea. He sits Adora, who has a groggy look on her face, up. Lex Robinson: He smashes the pumpkin onto Adora's head! Holy crap! Steve Hebert: And it's left covering her entire head, too! Stevie grabs a chair... Lex Robinson: He takes that chair and he... and he... smashes it against the pumpkin! Pieces of pumpkin fly everywhere, as Adora falls back to the floor! Stevie makes the cover...! Steve Hebert: Yes, yes! The referee counts... ...1...2...3! Steve Hebert: Stevie Swing does it! We have a new Television Champion! Covered in pumpkin, ketchup, blood and lord knows what else, Stevie Swing stands to his feet, awarded with the Television Title by the referee. Lex Robinson: Stevie Swing is our new champ. He's just taken the title away from the Wifey. Wrapping the title around his waist, a very dizzy Stevie Swing prances around the backstage area, glad to be the new champion. Adora, alternatively, happens to be covered in pieces of pumpkin and appears very distressed, while lying next to the tombstone she tripped over. Winner: Stevie Swing

We go backstage, showing Morgana, along with her World Title, pumping herself up for the main event. The title hangs loosely over her right shoulder, as she jogs in place, even doing some jumping-jacks. Morgana: All right, Morgy. You can do it. Stopping in place, Morgana then walks forward, headed towards the entrance. -- FLASH -- The camera is now focused on Nikita, who is dressed in army fatigues, with her hair pulled back into a ponytail. She stands in place, thinking hard about things. After a moment of thought, she proceeds forward, ready to fight. -- FLASH -- The painted black face of Chris Extreme is shown walking through the hallway, getting awkward looks from several onlookers. He is alone, without Roscoe or Booger, and is making his way to the entrance, readying himself for his second Auschwitz Prison Match, which has been upgraded from last year's event. This time, there's no Corey Page and no owner of Sin Wrestling on the line. This time, it's about glory, the World Title and above all else, pride. -- FLASH -- Finally, the camera shows Chris Carson, appearing ready for war, dressed in army fatigues, just like Nikita, leading a march of angry men towards the entrance. His gaze is straight forward and he is perked up. His hands are blood-red and clinched into fists. Things are about to get bloody.

World Title Match -- Auschwitz Prison 2.0 The cameras return to the ringside area, where the wooden, steel and barbed-wire structure of the Auschwitz Prison has been set up. The domed structure has platforms near the top, enabling performers to jump off, with some barbed-wire nets hanging to the side. Near the bottom of the cage, there's a wooden floor that sits outside of the ring, allowing combatants to step to the outside and do battle out there. Lex Robinson: It's main event time! Steve Hebert: And it's also death time! Anyone who walks inside of that will not be coming out alive. I can feel it. Someone will be leaving tonight as a zombie. Lex Robinson: Everyone's safety will be at risk. Inside, there's barbed-wire, glass tables, wooden tables, light tubes, a bag of thumbtacks, shards of glass. Hell, there's even lighter fluid in there! Steve Hebert: We could have some roasted Nikita! Lex Robinson: One of the ring ropes has also been taken down, and it's been replaced with barbed-wire ropes! Can you believe that?! Imagine if someone gets caught up in that! Steve Hebert: I gleefully predict that there will be much death and destruction by the end of the night. Lex Robinson: My God... A driving drumbeat powered by tom-toms slides out of the speaker system, accompanied by the rev of a diesel engine. The twang of a guitar riff gets into step with it, the opening riff of Queens of the Stone Age's "You Think I Ain't Worth A Dollar...", and a logo that appears to be ripped from a funny car, a flaming decal that reads "Chris Carson", burns onto the opening screen. The moment the first scream of the lyrics punches in, the stage explodes with pyro, the burn fading out as Chris Carson comes out onto the stage in his wrestling gear, bare-chested and wearing black wrestling tights, with "The Classic" printed in blue down one side and "The Creep" in red down the other. Dead bull with the life from the low! I'll be massive conquistador! Give me soul and show me the door! Metal heavy, soft at the core Gimme toro, gimme some more Gimme toro, gimme some more Pressurize and neutralize Deep fried, gimme some mooooooore! The song continues to hurtle into action as Carson hikes down the ramp, followed by an army of angry, hairy, women-hating men. He makes them circle around the wooden and steel structure, until he climbs inside, walking in through the door. Space flunky, four on the floor! Fortified with the liquor store! This one's down, gimme some more Gimme toro, gimme some more Gimme toro, gimme some more Gimme toro, gimme some moooooore! Once inside, he beckons the men to stand at the entrance, only giving a tiny bit of room for his other opponents to come out. Lex Robinson: Look at all these men... Steve Hebert: I bet you're in heaven, Lex. Lex Robinson: What? No. No way. Steve Hebert: All of these angsty, grunting men are here to help Chris Carson put an end to his war with that pink slut, Morgana. Lex Robinson: I could care less about men. I was just pointing them out. Steve Hebert: Surrrre. But that doesn't take away the fact that Morgy isn't going to bleed pink; but she's going to bleed red. Blood red. The arena goes dark and whitish blue strobe lights flash to the beat of "Save Yourself" by Stabbing Westward, which erupts over the speakers in the arena. Nikita steps out onto the stage and then makes her way down to the ring. I know that you've been damaged Your soul has suffered such abuse But I am not your savior I am just as fucked as you Nikita enters the cage, examining the barbed-wire rope, while keeping an eye "The Creep" Chris Carson. I can not save you I can't even save myself! Much like "The Creep", she is decked in army fatigues, ready for a battle, getting a loud ovation from the fans. Grabbing a light tube, she swings it back-and-forth like a baseball bat and then caresses it lovingly. Lex Robinson: Nikita is caressing that light tube. You bet she's ready for a war. Steve Hebert: She's preparing for her post-match ritual of caressing her husband, Stryker Graff's, cock. Lex Robinson: God, stop that. Steve Hebert: Hey, they're married! It's not my problem. Lex Robinson: You truly are the worst. Steve Hebert: Besides, if she has her fingers cut off again, she won't be able to do it. So, it's all good. Lex Robinson: Ugh... A giant, blood dripping globe with a swastika carved into it appears. Chris Extreme's voice is heard shouting viciously in the background. DIE WHORES! DIE FAGGOTS! DIE NIGGERS! DIE SPICS! DIE CHINKS! DIE MUSLIMS! DIE JEWS! DIE JESUS! DIE GOD! DIE MOTHER EARTH! DIE HUMANITY DIE! The heavy metal tune of "Sonne" by Rammstein blasts over the speakers. Chris Extreme marches out, swastika scarred on his naked chest, and masked in blackface paint. He heads to the ring alone, getting a myriad of jeers from the audience, especially from the white fans in attendance. Lex Robinson: Uhm... what the... Steve Hebert: Haha, look at those white folks booing the black man! Lex Robinson: But Chris Extreme isn't black; he's white! Steve Hebert: No way, they're booing the black man. They hate blacks here, you know. Come to think of it, they should be cheering for Chris Extreme; but what can you do? Lex Robinson: I don't think... Steve Hebert: Oh, come on, we've all seen this place on the news. Chris Extreme pulls open the door to the cage, strolls inside and then slams the door behind him. Instead of getting into the ring, he remains outside, standing on the wooden floor, while Nikita shifts her gaze towards him. Lex Robinson: Nikita points that light tube at Chris Extreme, no doubt wanting to smash it against his head. Steve Hebert: His poor black head. See what I did there? "Poor black"? Haha. Lex Robinson: You're a pitiful human being. Steve Hebert: Lighten up, shitstain. oh make me over i'm all i want to be a walking study in demonology The arena darkens as the first chords of "Celebrity Skin" by Hole tear through the sound system, sparking the words "Morgana" to etch across the blank screen in bold pink script, accompanied by images of Morgana. The crowd cheers loudly as pink and gold fireworks explode down the ramp, and Morgana saunters out from back stage, wearing a miniscule pink and black skort, black fishnets, knee-high boots and a tight black tank top, her pink hair pulled into two loose braids. Basking in the cheers of the crowd, Morgy slowly makes her way to the ring, pausing every so often to blow kisses to fans in the front row before stopping outside of the cage. you want a part of me? well, i'm not selling cheap no, i'm not selling cheap "Celebrity Skin" dies over the speakers as Morgy parades confidently around the ring, standing in her own corner, the furthest away from the barbed-wire rope. Lex Robinson: And here's our World Champion, Morgana! Steve Hebert: What a bitch. Lex Robinson: We're just seconds away from the start of this match. We have Chris Extreme marching around the outer portion of the ring, eyeing the bag of thumbtacks; we have Nikita still with the light tube in her hand; and we have "The Creep" and Morgana standing in opposite corners of the ring, wanting to tear each other apart. Steve Hebert: How sexy. Lex Robinson: And there's the bell! Ding, ding, ding...! Lex Robinson: It's on! Right off the bat, Nikita reaches inside her pants and... she pulls out some eggs! She then whips them at Chris Extreme's head, catching him off-guard! Steve Hebert: What the Jesus? She said she had no eggs this year! She lied! Lex Robinson: Maybe Chris Extreme won't give her some candy. Steve Hebert: He'll give her candy, alright. He'll give her candy on that bed of nails that he slammed her onto. Trying to cover himself up from the onslaught of eggs, Chris stumbles back, accidentally entangling his arm in a strand of barbed-wire hanging from the side of the cage. This allows for Nikita to steamroll forward and smash that light tube open across his painted-black skull! Lex Robinson: Blammo! Pieces of that light tube explode everywhere! Steve Hebert: Oh Jesus, how frustratingly awful. Lex Robinson: Just as that happens, Morgana and Chris Carson charge at each other from opposite sides of the ring. "The Creep" double-leg takedowns Morgana, straddles her and then unloads with a flurry of punches to her pink skull! When finished striking her, he picks her up, knees her in the gut and goes to whip her into the barbed-wire ropes. However, she puts the brakes on seconds before running into it. Steve Hebert: Boo! Lex Robinson: As she turns around, she notices that Chris Carson is running at her at full-speed. She ducks to the side and goes to drop-toe-hold him, but he stands his ground. Steve Hebert: Phew. Thank God, that was too close. Still on his feet; and thankfully not face-first into that barbed-wire, Chris Carson turns around and stomps on Morgana's chest and head, keeping her down and out. Lex Robinson: Speaking of down and out, Nikita climbs to the top rope and then dives out onto Chris Extreme, smashing him against the wood and steel of the cage! As they drop to the ground, she lands on Chris, picks up a shard of glass and then scrapes it across Chris Extreme's forehead. Steve Hebert: Oh Jesus, he's bleeding already. LeX Robinson: Despite the black facepaint, Chris Extreme is the first to bleed. That facepaint and his blood make a tasty combination, too! Steve Hebert: Ugh. With a fistful of glass, Nikita begins smashing away at Chris Extreme's skull, bloodening her own fists in her attempts. Lex Robinson: Blood soaks between Nikita's fingers, as she pummels Chris Extreme's skull over and over again. Steve Hebert: If we get lucky, maybe she'll cut her own fingers off. Lex Robinson: Pulling "Lord Nazi" up to his feet, Nikita grabs onto him and then smashes hisface off the side of the domed-cage, grinding his flesh off the barbed-wire and wood. Steve Hebert: Stop it! He may get a splinter! A splinter to the eyeball! Lex Robinson: With Nikita bashing Chris Extreme's skull into the cage, we can't forget about Chris Carson and Morgana. Steve Hebert: You're goddamn right. "The Creep" has that pink-haired bitch knocked against the turnbuckle pads, where he is swatting and striking her over and over, again. This is him getting revenge for his loss in the desert a few weeks ago, Lex. Lex Robinson: He lost on his own accord. Steve Hebert: Just like how he won on his own accord at the last Eternity? Lex Robinson: You've really got to be kidding me. Morgana did all the work; he just creeped -- no pun intended -- in at the last second, punched out Morgana and then got the pinfall. Steve Hebert: Not the way I saw it! Lex Robinson: In that case, I guess you're not seeing Morgy battle back with some thrusts to Carson's throat. Steve Hebert: Uh, well... Lex Robinson: And I guess you're really not seeing her use the ropes to propel herself into the air, allowing her to mule-kick Chris Carson in the chest, knocking him back. Steve Hebert: Uh, fuck you. Lex Robinson: And I really guess you're not seeing her springboard to the top rope, where she flies off the top, hitting a picture-perfect flying hurricanrana! Steve Hebert: Oh, shut up, this is awful! Rolling up to his feet, Chris Carson stumbles around, trying to regain his footing, but fails; partially thanks to Morgana, who instantly walks up to him and delivers a flipping dropkick, knocking him back into the barbed-wire ropes! Steve Hebert: Oh no! Lex Robinson: Chris Carson falls into the barbed-wire ropes! Steve Hebert: This is awful! Look at the pain of "The Creep"'s face! This is disgusting! In fact, look at the smile on Morgy's face! Ugh. Lex Robinson: Furthermore, she bounces off the furthest set of ropes, springs back and returns with a dropkick to "The Creep"'s face! As a result, he flips over the barbed-wire ropes, remaining entangled in them, though, in the process! Steve Hebert: No, no, no... Lex Robinson: Morgana, meanwhile, climbs to the adjacent top turnbuckle. She dives off, hitting a flying Shooting Star Press onto Chris Carson, finally slicing him away from the barbed-wire ropes! Unfortunately for "The Creep", this results in the shedding of the skin on his arms! Steve Hebert: Disgusting! Lex Robinson: Morgana stands back up... only to walk right into a light tube shot from Nikita, who had picked up another tubing! Glass sprinkles everywhere as Nikita, the former World Champ, splinters the tube across Morgana's head! Steve Hebert: My God, I hope these two whores kill each other. Lex Robinson: Holding a piece of the tubing in her hand, Nikita is about to smash it down across Morgy's head, hoping to slice her open, but before she can get anywhere, a bloodied Chris Extreme pounces on her from behind! Grabbing Nikita's arm, he strikes her with a piece of wood he yanked off the side of the cage! Having dropped Nikita to the platform, he instantly picks her up and holds her high into the air, in a back-suplex position. Steve Hebert: Wait... is he? He is! He is going to drop her crotch-first across the barbed-wire ropes! Lex Robinson: He does! He drops Nikita vagina first across the barbed-wire ropes! Steve Hebert: Poor Stryker Graff. He can never catch a break. Lex Robinson: As Nikita stands there, almost in tears, Morgana bumbles to her feet. Using the top ring rope as a springboard, she dives through the air, connecting with a flying dropkick to Nikita, knocking her off the barbed-wire ropes! Steve Hebert: Uh, "thanks, I guess," is what Nikita should say to her. I mean, she did get her away from the barbed-wire; but it was kind of harsh. Lex Robinson: Seriously. Sitting on the floor of the cage, Chris Carson collects glass shards, holding them in his hand, watching as Chris Extreme turns around. When the time is right, he rises to his feet and throws the shards into Chris Extreme's face, blinding him! Steve Hebert: What the fuck?! No, "Creep"! That's certainly not good! Lex Robinson: Chris Extreme has been blinded -- by his own enemy! What were you expecting, Steve? Were you really expecting these two to go the entire match without touching or beating on each other? Steve Hebert: ...Is it okay if I said yes? Lex Robinson: If that's the case, you really have dumbfounded me. You know the bloodlines between these two and how much hatred and history they share. Steve Hebert: But there's more pressing matters! Like beating the hell out of Pinky and Fingers. Outside of the ring, Chris Extreme stumbles about, trying to clear his vision. Suddenly, he hears "The Creep" call out to him, prompting him to swing a vicious punch towards Chris Carson's head... Lex Robinson: Hah! Chris Extreme strikes the barbed-wire and wood, thinking it's Chris Carson! Steve Hebert: Ugh, his hand may have been busted open. Lex Robinson: As Chris Extreme remains hunched over, Chris Carson pulls out a barbed-wire wrapped chair. Steve Hebert: Oh dear. Lex Robinson: Chris Carson slams that chair across the back of Chris Extreme, the barbed-wire slicing open Chris Extreme's back! Dumping the barbed-wire chair into the ring, Chris Carson grabs onto one of the steel chains hanging from the cage, wraps it around his fist and then smashes his fist off Chris Extreme's skull! Steve Hebert: Jesus, some more blood overlays the facepaint, now. Lex Robinson: Smiling at the damage he has done, Chris Carson turns around, only to view Morgana charge at him. Thinking quickly, he throws Morgana into the air, sending her flying towards Chris Extreme, who remains hunched over. With gravity pushing down, Morgana extends her left leg and delivers a legdrop behind the back of Chris Extreme's head, smashing his head into the wooden floor! Steve Hebert: Jesus Christ, poor Chris Extreme. Lex Robinson: Chris Carson steps forward, grabs a handful of Morgana's head and lifts her to her feet. Seconds after headbutting her, he then smashes her skull off the side of the cage, making sure to grind her face against the wood. Applying a reverse-facelock, "The Creep" hoists Morgy into the air and proceeds to dump her back into the ring, showing little emotion for her landing. Like a blinded animal, Chris Extreme gets to his hands and knees, crawling towards the corner of the ring, where the thumbtacks are located. Seeing Chris Extreme motion towards the bag, Chris Carson headstowards him, grabs onto his boxers and pulls them down. Lex Robinson: Chris Carson kicks "Lord Nazi" in the ass -- literally! He just pulled down his boxers and kicked him between the crack of his arsehole! Steve Hebert: Did you just say "arsehole"? Lex Robinson: Yes. Unfortunately, this gives Chris Extreme a little bump forward. This allows him to reach forward, grab onto the bag of thumbtacks and swing them around at Chris Carson's head! The impact of the blow is as damaging as swatting "The Creep" with a sack of doorknobs, resulting in Chris Carson being left hanging over the top rope. Steve Hebert: Ironically, as Chris Carson lays stunned over the top rope, Nikita rolls back into the ring, grabs the barbed-wire chair and then bashes it across the top of Chris Carson's skull, sending him flying back into the side of the cage. Lex Robinson: He's even left dangling there for a few seconds! When he frees himself, he falls -- and falls hard! He lands squarely on the wooden floor, his bleeding forehead leaving a pool of blood behind! Steve Hebert: It's like a scene from SAW. Lex Robinson: Nikita goes to follow up on her previous attack, but she is assaulted from behind by Morgana, who kicks her in the lower back. Turning Nikita around, she punches her in the face, backs her into the ropes and whips her out. When Nikita rebounds, Morgana leapfrogs up-and-over her and returns to the original ropes, only to have Chris Extreme reach inside, grab onto her hair and drag her down! Steve Hebert: Yes! One for the good guys! Lex Robinson: Climbing inside, Chris Extreme stomps on Nikita and then wards off an attack from Morgana, pushing her away with a punch to the skull. He then grabs her pink hair and throws her over the top rope, where she lands atop a pile of glass shards, her back being cut open, in the process. Steve Hebert: I wish it were her ugly face, instead! Lex Robinson: Alone in the ring, Chris throws down the bag of thumbtacks and looks to the corner, where a glass table has been setup. Grabbing onto Nikita's ears, he drags her in, sits her against the table, gnaws on her face with a bite and then backs into the opposite corner. Steve Hebert: Remember that time Chris Extreme went into a psychosis and thought he was a vampire from 30 Days of Night? Well, it just happened, so how could you forget? Lex Robinson: Pulling his boxers up, he points at Nikita and then charges at her; only to turn his body around in mid-air and send his asshole flying towards her face, hoping to smash her head through the table! Steve Hebert: She moves! Lex Robinson: Oh my! Chris Extreme and his asshole bursts through that glass table, sending glass of shards everywhere! Steve Hebert: Including into his asshole! Oh dear. LeX Robinson: Bloodstains are now found on the back of Chris Extreme's boxers. My god! Steve Hebert: You're telling me. Stumbling out, Chris Extreme holds his bloody asshole, trying to stay on his feet. Turned away, he doesn't notice Morgana slowly begin to ascend the side of the cage, where she positions herself atop a wooden platform. Lex Robinson: Morgana has climbed high in the air... but can she reach Chris Extreme?! Do you know how far she'd have to fly?! Steve Hebert: She has to wait for Chris Extreme to turn around, though! Lex Robinson: WAit, Chris Carson is climbing up with her! Steve Hebert: Good! Kill the bitch! Lex Robinson: Due to her position, she is unable to see "The Creep" ascend. As she sets herself up, Chris Carson grabs onto her foot like a hungry zombie. Steve Hebert: He isn't letting her dive off, either. Lex Robinson: Soon, Chris Carson is on the platform with her! Steve Hebert: Kill her, "Creep", kill her! Lex Robinson: Finally, she tries to kick him off, but his resilience keeps him afloat. Instead, he stands to his feet, and they begin exchanging chops, slaps and punches. Chris Carson delivers a stunning blow, forcing Morgana to stumble back, almost knocking her into one of those barbed-wire nets! Steve Hebert: Good! Lex Robinson: However, she fires back with a knee to his gut, seconding that with an uppercut, almost knocking "The Creep" off the platform, sending him to the floor. Steve Hebert: Bad! Lex Robinson: It was so close to happening, too. Steve Hebert: My God, shut the fuck up. Stop saying such awful things. Lex Robinson: Fine. Because Chris Carson fires back with a choke-hold thrust, knocking the oxygen out of Morgy! Steve Hebert: That almost knocked her off! She grabs onto him! Lex Robinson: And they both fall off! They both fall from the platform, where they freefall all the way to the floor of the cage! They smash through a wooden table that had been setup! Holy Christ! Steve Hebert: But Nikita and Chris Extreme are too busy fighting with each other to capitalize on this! Lex Robinson: Morgana and Chris Carson lay on the floor, badly beaten and bruised, having fallen from the top of the platform. It's like a plane crash out there! Steve Hebert: Morgana has just crashed into the World Trade Center! Lex Robinson: Still unaware of what just occured, Chris Extreme continues to stumble around, removing glass shards out of his... well... his behind. Steve Hebert: His poor asshole. He'll be shitting glass for a week, now. Lex Robinson: As this happens, Nikita squirms to a kneeling position. Grabbing onto the bag of thumbtacks, she dumps them out, while Chris remains oblivious to this fact. Spreading the tacks out, she charges at Chris Extreme, hitting him with a high knee to the back, sending him sprawling into the barbed-wire ropes, his chest being sliced open! Steve Hebert: This is horrifying. This is worse than House of the Dead. Lex Robinson: With the tacks placed where she wants them, she grabs Chris by the head, goes into the corner with him and climbs to the second rope. She swings out, hoping to drive Chris Extreme's head into the thumbtacks with a Tornado-DDT... Steve Hebert: But with a gust of energy, Chris is able to throw her forward, resulting in her landing tits-first onto the thumbtacks! Haha! Lex Robinson: Oh my... Steve Hebert: Struggling for oxygen, Chris picks up the barbed-wire wrapped chair, waddles up to Nikita, who is writhing in pain, and slams the chair into her back! Both her front and her back have definitely been cut open! Grabbing another regular chair, Chris brings it into the ring, opens it up and takes a seat on it. Now what's he doing? LeX Robinson: He's taking a breather; or so it seems! All while Nikita rolls around in pain. He's... he's smiling! He's smiling at the fact that Nikita is rolling around in those tacks! Steve Hebert: He grabs a handful of thumbtacks, places them on Nikita's forehead and breast... and begins stomping them! Hahaha, yes! Oh my, this is hilariously awesome. She'll be removing thumbtacks from her body for weeks on end. As Morgana slowly rises from her previous crash-landing, she can merely watch as Chris Extreme exits to the outside of the ring and gets a bed-of-nails. Sliding it inside, he re-introduces Nikita to the wooden board with nails hammered through it. Lex Robinson: Not this again... Steve Hebert: Hell yes. It's time for Nikita to get re-acquainted with the bed-of-nails. I don't think she got enough of it at the last Eternity. Lex Robinson: This is dangerous. This is very, very dangerous. Steve Hebert: I know! Isn't it great! Kicking Nikita until she is on her stomach, while laying on the thumbtacks, Chris Extreme holds the board with nails high above his head, only to then slam it down harshly onto the back of Nikita! Lex Robinson: Ow! Owwww! That has to hurt! Steve Hebert: He bounces off the ropes... and returns with a double-stomp onto that board, driving those nails into Nikita's back! Hahaha, Stryker Graff will be married to a vegetable by the time this is all over. Lex Robinson: Grabbing onto Nikita's legs, he pulls her out from underneath the nails and begins to drag her along the thumbtacks and glass shards, until he finally turns her over and applies a Boston Crab. Worst of it all, that Boston Crab is in the middle of all that junk and sharp objects. Steve Hebert: This will make Nikita tap out, I'm sure of it. Chris Extreme will become the new World Champion without even having to defeat the current champ! Lex Robinson: Speaking of the current champ, she's on the side of the ring right now, viewing Chris Extreme's atrocities. Holding her back, she squirms, trying to block out the pain, and then springboards off the top rope! Flying through the air, she latches onto Chris Extreme's head, ending the Boston Crab attempt on Nikita, with a flying bulldog into the bed of nails! Steve Hebert: Oh Jesus! That whore! Lex Robinson: Not only did that hurt Chris Extreme, but the landing hurt Morgana, as well! Both of them are down and out; along with Nikita, who has become a bloodied mess. With everyone else down and out, Chris Carson stands from the outside rubble, having his army shirt ripped, thanks to the barbed-wire. Before re-entering the ring, he sets up a glass table on the floor. Steve Hebert: He's getting another glass table! He's double-stacking them! Lex Robinson: Right you are. Taking another steel chair within the ring, Chris Carson slides inside, stumbles around and witnesses all three of his opponents laid out. Holding the chair above his head, he instantly targets Morgana, who had been rising to her feet, bashing the steel across the back of her beautiful, pink head! Steve Hebert: Throwing the chair down, he grabs yet another glass table... errr, no. It's just a regular glass pane. He gets the two chairs inside of the ring and sits them face-to-face, about a meter apart. From there, he places the glass pane across the two chairs, turns around and roughly lifts Morgana up to her feet. Lex Robinson: Punching her in the head, he knocks her back in a kneeling position. He picks up a shard of glass, using it as a blade. Steve Hebert: It's a scene similar to that from a few weeks ago! Lex Robinson: Holding the shard of glass next to Morgy's forehead, Chris Carson goes to slide her open. Steve Hebert: Wait, no, he stops and laughs. Lex Robinson: That cocky bastard. He has other plans for Morgana. Pulling the World Champ to her feet, Chris Carson hammers her with a bionic-elbow and then throws her into the ropes. As she bounces back, he gets ready to catch her and throws her high into the air with a fallaway slam! Lex Robinson: Morgana is thrown high into the air... and... she smashes front-first through that glass panel! Shard of glass explode everywhere beneath Morgy! Her chest may be cut up! Goddamn! Steve Hebert: Those poor gigantic tits. I'll kiss them better, that dirty whore. Lex Robinson: The glass literally just dissipated beneath her! Steve Hebert: "The Creep" stands over Morgy, badmouthing her -- rightfully so. He follows that up by... wait... Lex Robinson: Chris Extreme rises to his feet, grabs one of the chairs and smashes it against Chris Carson's right arm, which has already been slashed open! This shot forces Chris Carson to huddle over, hold his arm, and try to clot the bleeding. Chris Extreme shows little worry for this, though, as he grabs "The Creep"'s hair and throws him towards the barbed-wire ropes! Steve Hebert: Oh lord, Chris Carson's head gets caught in the barbed-wire, so he's left to hang there. Chris Extreme just laughs at this and then looks at Morgana, who is laying at his feet. Lex Robinson: The barbed-wire grinds into "The Creep"'s forehead, as he struggles to free himself. But yes, you're correct. Chris Extreme is now looking awkwardly as Morgana, who is below him, licking his lips. The black facepaint slowly being covered by red blood, which drips into his mouth, he hovers around our World Champion, watching as the front of the Sailor Scout suit she's wearing is shown to be torn and slightly bloodied. Steve Hebert: Above all else, however; Chris Extreme has taken out his cock and is jerking it off. Lex Robinson: ...Wow, well, that's fucking horrifying. Steve Hebert: We're going to have some cock-on-face slapping! It's about goddamn time. Lex Robinson: Chris grabs Morgana's pink head. Here it goes... ugh... However, before his cock can slap her face, she reaches down, grabs a shard of glass and slices it into Chris Extreme's genitals, sending a squirt of blood flying into the air, landing on her nose. Steve Hebert: FUCK WHY! Lex Robinson: Oh my God, I think I felt that in my crotch. Steve Hebert: This is the goriest, most disgusting movie since Salo. This is worse than kids being forced to fuck each other and eat their shit! Chris Extreme stumbles back, holding his wounded penis in his hand, slowly pulling his white boxers over his wound. Soon enough, the front of his boxers turn white-to-blood red. Lex Robinson: Absolutely horrifying. In the meantime, while all of this occurs, Nikita has risen to her feet and is in the corner, where she tries to regain her strength and cover her wounds. Slowly, but surely, she climbs to the top turnbuckle, only to have Morgana witness her rise, as well. Lex Robinson: Morgana notices Nikita on the top rope. As a result, she scurries in, vaults up the top rope and leaps into the air, catching Nikita with an enziguiri! Knocked senseless, Nikita loses her footing and crotches herself on the top turnbuckle. Steve Hebert: Good lord, everyone's crotch is getting such a beating in this match. Lex Robinson: Don't remind me! Getting a table, Morgana sets it up parallel to the turnbuckle that Nikita is leaning on. Turning back to Nikita, she climbs to the top rope, where she holds her crotch. Steve Hebert: Poor Nikita; and her poor cooter. Actually, no, fuck that. Poor Chris Extreme; and his poor cock. Up here, Morgana attempts a super-hurricanrana; but Nikita woefully hangs on. Both women opt to slug it out, with Nikita overcoming Morgana, using her wisdom and leverage to her own advantage. Lex Robinson: Nikita striks Morgy with a palm thrust... Steve Hebert: And a headbutt, too! Lex Robinson: After delivering some punches, Nikita goes to reverse things by throwing Morgana through the table...! Steve Hebert: But that old cunt, Morgana, hangs on. She fires back with some punches... Lex Robinson: Instead, Nikita grabs onto Morgana, putting her into a suplex position and... she superplexes Morgana to the outside, through the double-stacked set of glass tables! Glass goes everywhere! Holy Jesus merciful! Steve Hebert: I think both Morgana and Nikita are dead. They literally just free-falled from that top rope, all the way to the wooden floor. Finally removing himself from the strands of barbed-wire, Chris Carson lands on his feet on the floor, wearing what almost looks like a blood-red crown. Showing no mind of this, he saunters around the ringside area, where he looks at both Nikita, who is holding her ribcage, struggling to breathe; and Morgana, who is also holding her ribs, having her body torn-up from the glass. Steve Hebert: "The Creep" is on the hunt, Lex. He hunches over, grabs Morgana by her stupid pink head and then bashes her skull off the steel fence! From here, she is then hoisted up into a back-suplex position, allowing for Chris Carson to bash her against the side of the cage! Lex Robinson: He just flung her like a dart! She hangs upside-down, her foot caught in the barbed-wire! Steve Hebert: Haha, that dumb skank! Lex Robinson: Reaching inside of the ring, Chris Carson pulls out one of the steel chairs. Oh my Jesus... Steve Hebert: He begins wailing away on Morgana, smashing the chair across her chest over and over again! Hell, it's not only her chest, it's her entire body! Lex Robinson: He sees Nikita slowly rise... Steve Hebert: Blammo! She blasts her head with the chair and bashes her skull against the cage! Face, meet wood and steel, cunt. Lex Robinson: Dropping the chair, he covers Nikita... Steve Hebert: Morgana is strung upside-down! She's unable to break the count. He'sgoing to do it! ...1...2... Lex Robinson: But you forgot about Chris Extreme! From inside of the ring, Chris Extreme has risen, bloody boxers and all. He has taken the barbed-wire wrapped chair, uses it to crawl towards the ropes and then frantically heaves it down onto the back of Chris Carson's head, stopping the count! Steve Hebert: Goddamnit! We could have had "The Creep" as the new World Champion! Lex Robinson: Sliding out of the ring, with blood dripping from beneath his boxers, Chris Extreme picks up a broken-half of the wooden table. He uses it to jam across Chris Carson's neck, wanting to keep him down and incapacitated. Along with this, he grabs a chain off the side of the cage and wraps it around Chris Carson's neck, preparing to give him some payback for earlier. Steve Hebert: God, they need to stop this immediately. They need to batdown those other two whores. In fact, Morgana still hasn't gotten down from the side of the cage. LeX Robinson: That's partially because she is climbing to the top of another platform. Steve Hebert: Well then, I hope the results are the same as the last time! Lex Robinson: It's a really dangerous position and situation to be in. Having the chain wrapped around Chris Carson's throat, Chris Extreme forces "The Creep" up, continuing to choke him and then blasts his face off the wooden boards that allow for climbing. Steve Hebert: God, the two Chris' need to turn around. LeX Robinson: You better believe it because Morgana is set up on that plank... With her back turned to everyone on the ground, Morgana leaps off, doing a total of 2 roatations, hitting a 720 degree moonsault from the top of the maniacal structure! Lex Robinson: Holy Jesus! A 720 moonsault plancha has just taken everyone down! Steve Hebert: All four members of this match lay next to each other, as if were one giant mass-murder scene! There's definitely broken limbs, cuts, bruises, flesh wounds, etc.! This is insane! Lex Robinson: I've told you before and I'll tell you again: gravity fears Morgana! Steve Hebert: I just wish gravity would knock that bitch on her face. Just once. Lex Robinson: The first person up to his/her feet is Nikita, the only person Morgana didn't strike with that moonsault. Steve Hebert: But she looks worn-down as hell. Lex Robinson: Not only that, but she seems to be spitting up some blood, which is never good. Nikita stands up, bloody drools hanging from her mouth, while pinking Morgy up by her pink hair. Smashing Morgana's welted face off the side of the steel mesh, Nikita hopes to grind an opening into Morgy's head, only to give up and roll Morgana back inside. Steve Hebert: Whoregana is rolled inside, where she is forced to roll around in the thumbtacks and broken glass. Lex Robinson: Kind of like Nikita before her. Speaking of Nikita, she's stepping inside, as well. Despite the blood spooling from her mouth, she stands above Morgana, who tries to get to her feet, but can only get to a kneeling position before Nikita can attack her. Grabbing a handful of thumbtacks, Nikita begins to rub them into Morgana's face, hoping to un-pretty her. Steve Hebert: Nikita's just jealous. In fact, it was Morgana that took the World Title from Nikita, so it's no wonder. Lex Robinson: Despite having the tacks rubbed into her face, Morgana pops Nikita in the gut with her broomlike fists, bending Nikita over. Soon after, Morgana hits a kneelift, holds Nikita into a suplex position and then throws her forward, dropping her across the barbed-wire ripes! Steve Hebert: It may not be the uterus, but Christ, those strands are digging into Nikita's stomach! LeX Robinson: As she's left hanging there, Morgana bursts into action by leaping onto the adjacent middle rope. She springboards back, hitting a corkscrew legdrop to the back of Nikita's head, dropping her off the barbed-wire! That's good for Nikita... I guess. On one knee, Morgana struggles to stand, only to be accosted by Chris Carson, who has rolled back inside. Lex Robinson: An attack to the back of Morgy from "The Creep"! Steve Hebert: Now that's more like it! "The Creep" turns Morgy around, standing headscissors her, holds her up and then hits a leaping piledriver onto the thumbtacks! Lex Robinson: Man, oh man, those thumbtacks have got to be in her head. Steve Hebert: Her hair will change from pink-to-red soon enough. Lex Robinson: Chris Carson is making the cover... The referee drops down, wary to make the count because of all the sharp objects on the canvas. ...1...2... Lex Robinson: One... two... ... Steve Hebert: Argh! No! Chris Extreme slides inside, bloody cock and all, and drives the edge of that broken table half into the back of Chris Carson's skull! My God, can he stop that?! Lex Robinson: Once again, a Chris Carson cover has been broken up by Chris Extreme! Steve Hebert: It's happening way too often. With blood rapidly exiting his body, Chris Extreme lifts Chris Carson up, turns him around, knees him and then holds him between his legs, looking for the powerbomb. Steve Hebert: Chris Extreme with a headscissors... but "The Creep" backdrops him through an unbroken glass table! Lex Robinson: So much for that! Steve Hebert: Turning around, Chris Carson is... struck with that bed of nails, which Chris Extreme brought in! Except, this time, it is in Morgana's hands! She drops the board with the nails on the canvas, leaps onto "The Creep"'s shoulder and... Lex Robinson: Reverse hurricanrana! She hits a reverse hurricanrana onto the bed of nails! "The Creep" has just gone headfirst onto the nails! She goes for the pin...! ...1...2... Steve Hebert: Once again, Chris Extreme stops the count! Only this time, he yanks Morgy off. Applying a wheelbarrow hold, Chris Extreme hoists her up and drops her throat-first across the barbed-wire ropes! Holy Jesus yes! Lex Robinson: But just as he does this, he is also struck with that board-of-nails! Except it's Nikita that holds it, this time! What a reversal of fortune... what revenge! Dropping the board, Nikita facelocks Chris Extreme and then begins striking him with rapid-fire kneelifts, trying to choke every bith of oxygen out of him. When she's finished with that, she grabs one of the chairs that had been brought in by "The Creep" and measures Chris Extreme's bloody skull up, the black facepaint long gone. Steve Hebert: No! She's going to slam that chair off Chris's head! Lex Robinson: Not if Chris Carson has a say! Stomping up behind her, Chris Carson whips the chair out of her hands and then flings it at her head... Steve Hebert: But she ducks! Lex Robinson: And the chair smashes into Chris Extreme's head! And Chris Extreme's stumbles back into the barbed-wire ropes, having it dig into his skin! Steve Hebert: How depressing. Time for some sweet, sweet Xanax. Lex Robinson: Turning her attack towards Chris Carson, Nikita kicks "The Creep" in the gut, gives him a jawbreaker and then flings him overhead with a judo-throw! Steve Hebert: What's worse is that he landed in that pool of glass, thumbtacks and wood. Lex Robinson: Exactly. Sometimes the simplest things can be successful. Now, she's rolling him onto the bed of nails, which have to be digging steadily into Chris Carson's back. Looking towards the ropes, she charges ahead, looking to use the middle rope as a springboard... Steve Hebert: He moves! Lex Robinson: Nikita smashes onto the nails! Steve Hebert: She's like some sort of pincushion! Rolling into the corner, Nikita can do nothing but screech out in pain, while blood plumes out of her mouth. Lex Robinson: She's in a rack of pain! Standing to his feet, Chris Carson is taken aback when Morgana shoots out of the corner, delivering a "John-Woo Kick" to his chest! Lex Robinson: Morgana out of the corner, like a missile! She drives both feet into Chris Carson's chest, knocking him into the corner, his head smashing off the turnbuckles! Suddenly, Chris Extreme rips himself away from the barbed-wire, grabs onto Morgana's hair and goes to lift her up onto his shoulders. Steve Hebert: That bitch squirms out, though! Lex Robinson: She does... Chris Extreme turns around. He shoots a fireball at Morgana! What the hell?! Steve Hebert: But she bends back, as if she is in The Matrix movie! As a result, that flame goes right into Nikita's face, as she was walking up behind Morgana! Lex Robinson: Holy Christ! Nikita falls to the canvas, holding her face, having her hair and face singed! Steve Hebert: He got to the lighter fluid! As everyone else was mixing it up, he was laying against the barbed-wire ropes, sneaking some of that lighter fluid up. Lex Robinson: Stunned, Chris tries to figure out what just happened, but he is hung up when Morgana kicks him in the gut and delivers the "Reinventing Timothy Ashton"! Steve Hebert: Oh God...! Remember the last time this happened?! Lex Robinson: I do! It lead to Morgana winning the World Title from Nikita! Speaking of which, Morgy makes the cover on Nikita! Steve Hebert: It just gets worse. The referee makes the count... ...1... Lex Robinson: One... ...2... Lex Robinson: Two... ... Lex Robinson: Thr-... Steve Hebert: No! "The Creep" latches onto Whoregana's pink hair and slips her off! He saves the match; just in the nick of time, too! Lex Robinson: So godforsaken close! He strikes Morgana not once, not twice, but three times. He even goes as far as to suplex her onto the bed-of-nails! Steve Hebert: That's probably a regular occurence for Morgana. She is a filthy slut, you know. Lex Robinson: He holds her up, about to drop her onto the nails... but while she's in the air, she uses her knees to strike Chris Carson in the head! Morgana lands in front of "The Creep" 3/4 facelocks him and hits the Fata Morgana onto the nails! Good lord! Declining to cover "The Creep", Morgana opts to stand up and set up a wooden table. However, before she can turn around, she is attacked -- possibiy accidentally by a dizzy and burnt Nikita, who is spewing blood from her mouth. Turning around, Morgana has no other choice but to club Nikita across the face and then lay her across the table. Steve Hebert: Jesus, Nikita is looking more and more like a zombie as the minutes go by. This truly is a Halloween show. Lex Robinson: Ripping the barbed-wire off the ropes, Morgana now uses it to tie Nikita to the table! There's no getting out! Everyone else is down and out, including Chris Extreme, who's probably bleeding to death from his phallus! Steve Hebert: His cock; not a phallus! LeX Robinson: It's the same damn thing! Finished tying Nikita to the table, Morgana exits to the outside and quickly climbs to another platform at the top of the cage. This is going to be big; Nikita is out, unable to move, even if she tried! When Morgana reaches the platform, she stands tall, showing off her bloody Sailor Moon costume. With the fans firmly behind her, she soars through the air, higher than ever before! Lex Robinson: She flies! Steve Hebert: No! Twisting and contorting her body through the air, Morgana crashes down onto Nikita, putting her through the barbed-wire table with an ever more dangerous Morgasm! Lex Robinson: Morgasm! She lays atop Nikita, barely able to move! The referee sees this as a count...! ...1... Lex Robinson: One! ...2... Steve Hebert: This can't happen! She can't retain! ... Lex Robinson: ...Thr... ...3! Lex Robinson: ...eeee! There's the three! The match is over! Morgana retains the World Title, much to the chagrin of Chris Carson, who lays motionless on the bed-of-nails and Chris Extreme, who is in the corner, nursing to his injuries! This has been a fucking massacre! Steve Hebert: Bloodiest, most disgusting event I've ever been apart of. And I was there when your wife had her first period. Just as the World Title is draped over Morgana's bloody waist, medics enter the area. First, they focus on Nikita, who tries to sit up amongst the broken table. Lex Robinson: All four competitors are in major pain and trouble. Look t Nikita, for example... Nikita coughs as she tries to gasp for air, spraying blood onto the paramedic's white shirts. Finally they load her up onto a stretcher and push her backstage. Steve Hebert: Holy Jesus, I think I've seen that in a zombie movie. Lex Robinson: 28 SWs Later? Steve Hebert: I think so! Next, paramedics rush to Chris Extreme and place a gauze over his crotch, trying to stop the bleeding. Steve Hebert: Save his cock! Finally, Chris Carson is helped to his feet by medics and referees. Bloodied, scraped and beaten, he pushes everyone away and walks to the back, denying help from anyone. Before he can reach the back, though, he crumples to his knees, feeling the pain surge through his body. Lex Robinson: I hope you've all had a great Halloween, folks. I know we've had one. Steve Hebert: I'm covered in blood; and it's not even a part of my costume! Pumpkins don't bleed, Lex. Lex Robinson: Eh, anyhow, be sure to tune in to the next show to catch the fallout from Illusions. We've had a lot announced and a lot go down. We're sure to have more carnage inside that ring... if everyone can make it. After tonight, I think our injury list will skyrocket. Sheesh. The image fades out, showing medics bring Nikita behind the backstage curtain. Winner: Morgana

Ace Rodgers scrambles backstage like a chicken without a head trying to get the attention of a medic before finally cornering one. Ace Rodgers: How is Nikita? What happened? Is she going to be alright? Paramedic: Uh...well, Nikita has a few broken ribs, one of which punctured her lung when she tried to sit up, apparently. She's been sent to the hospital where she'll undergo surgery to repair her lung. She should be all right but she definitely won't be wrestling for a while. Ace Rodgers: Oh thank go-- Paramedic: Unless the surgeon fucks up, but that's what they have insurance for! Hah-hah... The paramedic is met by Ace's blank stare. Paramedic: Heh-heh...hi Mom. Ace Rodgers: Uh, how about everyone else? Morgana? Chris Extreme? Chris Carson? Paramedic: Listen, if everyone is still alive after tonight, it'll be a miracle. Ace Rodgers: But... Paramedic: No buts; not move along. The final image from Illusions is that of Nikita being wheeled into the ambulance and the ambulance driving off, hurriedly rushing past a pile of trick-or-treaters.