The camera turns on, starting the broadcast for Sin Wrestling's latest pay per view, One Minute 'Til Midnight. The first image shown is that of Morgana arriving to the building, holding a pink gym bag over her left shoulder, walking alone, towards the arena. With her head down, her pink hair covers her face, as she trudges forward, nearing the entrance.

The erratic sound of a rumbling motor stops her in her tracks. Turning around, she sees a broken-down vehicle charging towards her, full-speed ahead. Behind the wheel, "The Creep" Chris Carson is snickering with evil intent, not slowing down at all.

Throwing her bag to the side, Morgana prepares herself, using her parkour skills to her advantage. As the car nears, the leaps into the air, kicks herself off the bonnet and somersaults up-and-over the rest of the car, floating gently to the parking lot ground, landing on her own two feet!

The clunky car screeches to a halt behind her and Chris Carson peaks out the window.

Chris Carson: Tonight, it all comes to an end. It's you and I, one last time. Winner takes all.

He revs the engine.

Chris Carson: You better be ready; or else, you're gonna have that pink head of yours run over.

Popping his head back inside, he presses the pedal to the metal and speeds off, leaving behind a bewildered Morgy.

Morgana: Well, what the Jesus? What a douchebag. Now, where did I throw my gym-bag?

She scuttles off and the camera goes inside of the arena, where tonight's first match is about to get underway.

Singles Match

Jean-Paul Lacklan's entrance music is Beethoven's "Moonlight Sonata," as performed by the indy rock group The Inverse. As the song begins to play, the house-lights shut off, with purple lights showing the entrance ramp. Several of his Minions, his fans, then come out, each dressed in a long black robe and hood. They line the entranceway as Lacklan appears at the top of the ramp, a purple spotlight illuminating him.

As Lacklan makes his way down the aisle, the Minions bow to him and exit. Upon approach of the ring, Lacklan ascends the steps and climbs into the ring. As his name is announced, he flings back the cowl and rips off the hood in one fluid motion, revealing his classic mask and scarred head.

Lex Robinson: Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to Ottawa, Ontario. Tonight, we have the latest Sin Wrestling pay per view, One Minute 'Til Midnight, airing live all across the world!

Steve Hebert: What's so important about midnight, anyhow?

Lex Robinson: As you can hear, as usual, I'm joined by Steve Hebert, who will be helping me call tonight's action. You will be treated to an amazing card, with the main event featuring the culmination of the Chris Carson-Morgana feud!

Steve Hebert: About goddamn time. Those two crazy kids have been down each other's throat since last September or so. Jesus, they don't stop. Just tonight, we've already had "The Creep" try to run Morgy over! Even though he failed, I'm sure he'll get the job done later tonight.

Lex Robinson: Indeed. We also have Chris Extreme defending his World Title-...

Steve Hebert: Against Declan Turner, too!

Lex Robinson: Uh, well... no. For those of you that haven't seen the press release, Declan Turner has been injured -- accidentally at the hands of Morgana.

Steve Hebert: It was her stupid feet that knocked him out of the ring, causing him to injure his neck.

Lex Robinson: Well, yeah; but in any event, Chris Extreme is now defending his title again... uh... Booger.

Steve Hebert: Yes! Booger! This match just got 10 times more epic.

Lex Robinson: Ugh, it was Chris Extreme who suggested Booger step in to take Declan's place. I think we should all know what will happen when that match occurs. It's very unfortunate that we can't have Extreme/Declan, but things happen.

Steve Hebert: Yeah, "things happen". And right now, we have Jean-Paul Lacklan come to the ring, along with his minions.

Lex Robinson: This won't be the last time we'll see him and his minions make their entrance, too. Later tonight, we will be battling Jay and Aaron Joseph, trying to become the number one contender to the Impulse Title. However, right now, he must face his longtime nemesis, Stevie Swing, who galliantly accepted Jean-Paul's open contract.

Steve Hebert: That dancing douchebag kicked Jean-Paul in the face, no less! Right when Jean-Paul was expecting Morgana to sign the contract, too! How ridiculous.

Action Action’s “Don’t Cut Your Fabric” hits, and Stevie Swing slowly walks out to face the crowd. In his hand is a cigarette, which he takes one last puff from, before flicking it into the crowd. Around his neck is a collar with a leash going back to Stevie’s manager/master, Gail/Breeze.

Stevie breaks into a loose shuffle as the fans taunt him, chanting “emo-fag!”, as Stevie’s bondage pants stop him from fully busting out. Swing makes it to the ring and is unclipped from his leash. He rolls into the ring...

Stevie Swing adjusts his arm bracelets and goes to the corner, where he dances around a little bit, but nothing too much while Gail/Breeze screams in the background. The crowd try to drown her out with their booing, but Swing ignores it all, just waiting for the match to start.

Lex Robinson: Here he is, Steve, it's Stevie Swing!

Steve Hebert: The same Stevie Swing that has failed three-times in obtaining the World Title.

Lex Robinson: Let's not rub it in.

Steve Hebert: God, he's such a woman.

Lex Robinson: This is his first match back in Sin Wrestling since Santa Claus is Dead!

Steve Hebert: The same card that he managed to lose twice in one night... something that Jean-Paul Lacklan will not be doing tonight.

Lex Robinson: We'll have to see about that.

Once inside, both men stand, waiting for the bell to ring. Knowing each other quite well, neither contestant removes their eyesight from the other. When the bell finally rings, they step toward each other, about to get things started.

Lex Robinson: Here we go, there's the bell!

Steve Hebert: They stumble roar toward each other...

Lex Robinson: Bam! Stevie Swing begins by punching Lacklan in the face! Of course, Lacklan replies with a punch of his own, striking Stevie in the jaw! Right after that, Stevie connects with a punch and then a chop to the chest.

Steve Hebert: Ah, yes, a nice womanly slap.

Lex Robinson: Thanks to these chops, Stevie backs Jean-Paul against the ropes and attempts to whip him out. However, before throwing him forward, Lacklan reverses the whip; and instead hits a short-arm clothesline! Stevie falls onto his back!

Steve Hebert: And Lacklan goes crazy with some stomps on Stevie, trapping him against the corner turnbuckle pads, and unloads with a bunch of goddamn stomps to the head and chest! That's how you start a match -- by stomping the life out of your shithead opponent.

Lex Robinson: Jean-Paul Lacklan has really bulked up over these past few months, too. Compared to last year, anyhow, so those stomps are being aided by that much strength and muscle.

Grabbing Stevie by the head/hair, Lacklan easily yanks Stevie Swing up to his feet and delivers a headbutt. Keeping Stevie against the turnbuckle pads, Lacklan delivers some back-fists, timing them with some of his own chops and forearms.

Lex Robinson: Delivering one more headbutt, Lacklan Irish-whips Stevie across the ring, throwing him hard into the buckles. Seeing Stevie hold himself against the corner, Lacklan goes to charge in...

Steve Hebert: But that no-good, son of a bitch steps to the side and then slingshots himself to the outer portion of the apron, allowing Lacklan to smash into the buckles!

Lex Robinson: Stevie Swing with a forearm to Lacklan's jaw, from the outer part of the apron! He uses the top rope as a springboard and flies through the air, connecting with a springboard flying-dropkick!

Steve Hebert: Luckily, Lacklan remains afloat, albeit stumbling around.

Lex Robinson: Upon realizing this, Stevie gets to his feet, bounces off the ropes and returns with a spin-wheel kick... which also fails in knocking Lacklan down.

Steve Hebert: Jean-Paul Lacklan is a godforsaken monster, with God, of all people backing him. Of course he isn't going down with ease!

Popping right back up, Stevie kicks Lacklan in the knee, effectively bringing him down to a kneeling position. Bouncing off the ropes once more, Stevie returns with a seated-dropkick, smashing both feet into Lacklan's face, dizzying him.

Lex Robinson: That dropkick has Jean-Paul dazed. Stevie bounces off the ropes once more...

Steve Hebert: But Lacklan rises up, pushes Stevie up onto his shoulders and then Samoan Drops him! He makes a cover!

The referee drops down, seeing Lacklan looking to get a quick pinfall in this match...

...1...2...

Lex Robinson: Stevie Swing kicks out at the count of two, much to the delight of the fans!

Steve Hebert: And much to the chagrin of Jean-Paul Lacklan, which is much worse.

Standing to his feet, Lacklan hovers over Stevie, ala a voracious predator. Bending down, Lacklan grips Stevie by the neck, throttling him with a chokehold, and then hastily yanks him up to his feet, where the choke remains applied. Lacklan soon delivers a knee to Stevie's gut and then bounces off the rope, where he hopes to return with a lariat...

Lex Robinson: With his left-arm extended, Lacklan bounces back, hoping to lob off Stevie Swing's skull... but Stevie ducks! Bowing beneath Lacklan's arm, a slightly groggy Stevie steps forward, only to turn to his side and strike Lacklan with a half-hearted superkick/Last Dance kick!

Steve Hebert: He didn't get enough of it, though! That was utter desperation! Jean-Paul stumbles back, sprawling through the ropes, where he lands on his feet on the floor. Out here, he goes down to one knee, where he holds his chin, which was grazed by Stevie's foot.

Lex Robinson: In the ring, Stevie dispells any sense of damage, as he rises to his feet, noticing Lacklan on the floor. With thoughts of destruction in his mind, Stevie steps to the ropes, watching Lacklan stand to his feet. Grabbing onto the top rope, Stevie measures things up...

Steve Hebert: And there he goes...

Lex Robinson: Like a rocket blasting off, Stevie slingshots himself over the top rope, going for a plancha onto Jean-Paul Lacklan! Lacklan looks up... and he catches Stevie!

Steve Hebert: Ahh... hah! Stevie is literally plucked out of the air by big, bad Lacklan, who displays his power, as he circles around with Stevie in his clutches!

Lex Robinson: Stevie's plancha-attack is futile, which is proven even further by Lacklan slinging him forward, only to forcefully drop him stomach-first across the steel ring-railing!

Steve Hebert: Holy Jesus! That could be a few broken ribs right there! Or an injured stomach... or a broken uterus or something. We all know Stevie is a woman.

Lex Robinson: Ugh, quiet. Stevie Swing remains hanging over the ring railing, gasping for oxygen, while Lacklan stumbles around him, listening to the banter from the fans. Delivering an overly-stiff kick to Stevie's chest, Lacklan grabs Stevie's hair and proceeds to batter him with some repeated-elbows to the neck!

Steve Hebert: And some kneelifts, too!

Lex Robinson: Oh yes, the dreaded kneelifts, you can't forget those.

Taking a few steps back, Lacklan again listens to the fans trying to aggravate him, but remains silent, watching Stevie try to pull himself off the railing. At the last possible second, Lacklan steamrolls forward, coupling his charge with a running-knee to the side of Stevie Swing's head, officially knocking him off the railing, allowing him to fall into a clump on the floor!

Lex Robinson: Jesus, Jean-Paul Lacklan just catches Stevie Swing with a murderous knee-to-the-face!

Steve Hebert: I think Stevie's nose has officially been encaved inside of his head.

Lex Robinson: Oh, his nose is bleeding.

Steve Hebert: On top of that, Lacklan forces Stevie onto his feet... and then bashes his face off the ring apron! Even better!

Lex Robinson: As he rolls Stevie back inside, you can see a droplet of blood remnants on the apron, too. Following Stevie in, Lacklan ignores Stevie's bloody nose, allowing him to rise up to a kneeling position. Bouncing off the ropes, Lacklan returns, hoping to hit a Shining Wizard, but stops just short of Stevie, as he bares witness to Stevie placing both hands up to his face, hopefully blocking out the knee.

Steve Hebert: Lacklan is aware of this, though. He changes direction and goes to Stevie's side... and he hits him with a successful knee-to-the-head!

Lex Robinson: Rolling Stevie onto his back, Lacklan positions his forearm against Stevie's jaw, hoping to keep him peeled to the canvas. The referee goes to make the count...

...1...

Lex Robinson: ...One...

...2...

Lex Robinson: ...Two...

Steve Hebert: Come on...!

...

Steve Hebert: What the hell?!

Lex Robinson: Lacklan stops the count! Under his own accord, Jean-Paul Lacklan has stopped the three-count. He probably could have had Stevie Swing, too.

Steve Hebert: I don't... get it. But I have faith!

Lex Robinson: Viciously standing Stevie to his feet, Lacklan claws Stevie's back and then waistlocks him. Apparently going for a German-suplex, Jean-Paul Lacklan's attempts are thwarted by Stevie Swing, who relentlessly swings -- no pun intended -- his arms, wildly.

Steve Hebert: Lacklan temporarily releases the hold, using this time to clobber Stevie in the back. Again, he waistlocks him...

Lex Robinson: Once more, though, Stevie violently swings his arms, trying to find an escape. He even tries using some elbow-shots to Lacklan's face!

Steve Hebert: Agh... the hold is released, again. Lacklan with a knee to the back... and another waistlock! This time, he lifts Stevie up, stalls the release and goes to throw him once again.

Lex Robinson: Reaching out, Stevie tries to latch onto the top rope, but Lacklan pulls him back, using all of his might. Speaking of his strength, Stevie is lifted up again and is sent flying with a release German-suplex!

Steve Hebert: In the words of dirty, sweaty, muscular Zanta, "Yes, yes, yes!"

Lex Robinson: Wait... Stevie Swing is able to completely circle around in mid-air! He lands on his feet, negating the German suplex!

Steve Hebert: No, no, no!

Lex Robinson: Saying that didn't help Amy Winehouse; and it certainly isn't going to help you or Lacklan. Absolutely astonished, Jean-Paul gets to his feet, only to receive a leaping high-knee to the face from Stevie Swing, who has temporarily become rejuvenated!

Stunned from Stevie Swing's uprising, a bedazzled Jean-Paul Lacklan stumbles backward, bouncing himself off the ropes. Stepping out, Lacklan fires back with a punch to Stevie Swing's head, prompting Stevie to spiral back and bounce himself off the ropes, only to return with a forearm of his own.

Steve Hebert: They're exchanging blows... and I don't mean that in a sexual way. Lacklan replies with a forearm to Stevie... Stevie with a punch to Lacklan's head... it doesn't stop!

Lex Robinson: With each shot from Stevie, the fans chant "SWING!"

Steve Hebert: Don't forget about Lacklan! With some of his shots, he's getting a "JEAN" chant!

Lex Robinson: Yup, I know. In fact, he hammers Stevie Swing with a stiff-punch...

"JEAN"!

Lex Robinson: ...and now, a forearm from Stevie Swing!

"SWING"!

Jean-Paul Lacklan fires back with a haymaker of a punch...

"JEAN"!

Steve Hebert: "SWING... JEAN..." it's all I hear!

Lex Robinson: It'll remain that way until one man gains the upperhand.

Steve Hebert: With any luck, it'll be Lacklan; and not that quitter and overachiever, Stevie Swing.

Lex Robinson: "Overachiever"? Yeah, right. I think you might be a little confused, Steve.

Steve Hebert: Pffft.

Dazed from a Stevie Swing punch, Jean-Paul Lacklan stumbles back, pushing himself off the ropes, allowing him to burst forward with another forearm shot. Smashing his elbow/arm into Stevie's head, Jean-Paul uses momentum to knock Stevie backward, sending him into the ropes, ala himself just a few seconds ago.

LeX Robinson: Springboarding off the ropes, Stevie returns with a leaping single-leg dropkick to Jean-Paul Lacklan's face, finally ending the series of strikes!

Steve Hebert: Goddamnit, he even knocks Lacklan down.

Lex Robinson: Trembling to his feet, Stevie rushes towards the ropes and propels himself off the middle-rope. Leaping back, he hits a springboard moonsault onto Lacklan! Throwing his body over Lacklan, Stevie Swing makes the cover!

The referee counts...

...1...2...

Steve Hebert: The lord and saviour has kicked out! Was there any doubt, though?

Lex Robinson: That was way close, Stevie nearly had that matched shored up.

Steve Hebert: Well, he never, so shut the fuck up.

Stevie Swing is the first to rise, holding his ribs, as he stands. He traverses around Lacklan, who is slowly getting to a kneeling position, trying to keep his eyes on a sneaky Stevie Swing.

Lex Robinson: Now that Lacklan is down, Stevie Swing goes to the top rope, slowly climbing up, soon having his opponent in his crosshairs. Once Lacklan stands, Stevie Swing dives off...

Extending his legs, hoping to wrap them around Jean-Paul's head/neck, Stevie Swing attempts a hurricanrana...

Steve Hebert: Lacklan catches him, though! Jean-Paul Lacklan delivers a falling-powerbomb, driving Stevie Swing harshly into the canvas! Jean-Paul Lacklan with a jackknife-rolling pin...

The referee notices Lacklan rolling atop Stevie Swing, attempting a pinfall, and instantly starts the count...

...1...

Steve Hebert: He has it!

...2...

...

Lex Robinson: No! At the last second, Stevie Swing pops his shoulder off the canvas! Holy crap on a cock!

Surprised at the lack of a pinfall, a very stoic Jean-Paul Lacklan gets to a standing base, giving the referee a lengthy stare. Hunching over, he grabs onto Stevie Swing's big, Jewish nose and literally plucks him off the canvas via the nostrils.

Steve Hebert: Hell yeah, get that dirty Jewmo onto his feet. Scoop out some of those Jew-boogers.

Lex Robinson: Please send all hatemail to Steve Hebert. Thanks, everyone.

Steve Hebert: Huh? What did I do, now? All I did was make fun of his gigantic Jew nose. I swear to God, look at it. Actually, what am I saying? Jews don't have a God. They eve killed Jesus! Put him into the Jew incinerator!

Lex Robinson: ...Steve Hebert lives in Montreal, Quebec. His phone number is--...

Steve Hebert: Oh, come on!

In a scene reminiscient of earlier in the match, Stevie Swing is again hung out to dry, as Lacklan hoists Stevie up into a vertical-suplex position. Without warning, a peturbed Lacklan drops Stevie forward, slinging him onto him stomach-first onto the top rope!

Lex Robinson: Much like earlier, Stevie Swing is left to hang! Except this time, it isn't on a steel-railing.

Steve Hebert: Yeah, but he's still dangling from that rope, cutting into his Hebrew groin... or whatever his kind have down there.

Lex Robinson: Delivering some overhead punches, Jean-Paul stands back, measuring Stevie Swing up, once more. Jetting forward, he hopes to repeat the same knee-to-face strategy that he unloaded on the floor...

Just as Lacklan storms towards his head, hoping to strike with his knee, Stevie is able to regain his senses. This timing allows him to pop back and safely stand on his feet, on the outer-portion of the apron, letting Jean-Paul walk in front of him, missing Stevie's noggin'.

Lex Robinson: However, Stevie clears out of the way! Grabbing Jean-Paul by the shoulder, Stevie whips him around; and from the outer part of the apron, he strikes with a European Uppercut! Furthermore, Stevie Swing grabs onto Lacklan's head and falls to the floor, guillotining Lacklan's head across the top rope!

Steve Hebert: Jesus, we could have had a decapitation right there. ...It's too bad.

Lex Robinson: Jumping back onto the ring apron, Stevie springboards himself onto the top rope; but not before twisting his body around, having his body face Lacklan. Snapping off the top rope, Stevie Swing soars through the air, contorts around; and as gravity has its way, Stevie is able to clutch onto Lacklan's head, hitting a 720 degree DDT!

Steve Hebert: Oh Jesus, Lacklan's head has been driven directly into the canvas.

Lex Robinson: Peeling himself away from his fallen nemesis, Stevie Swing rolls to the outer-portion of the apron and uses the top rope to lift himself onto his feet. On his feet, he again uses the top rope as a springboard; this time hitting a springboard frog splash!

Steve Hebert: It just gets worse.

Lex Robinson: Despite breathing heavily, Stevie Swing lays across Lacklan, while hooking a leg...

As usual, the referee begins the count...

...1...2...

Steve Hebert: Lacklan kicks out at two!

Lex Robinson: Yet another close-call!

Steve Hebert: Don't remind me.

Lex Robinson: Frustration pervades across Stevie Swing's face, as victory is not yet within his grasp. With ease, he stands up, stalking over Lacklan, who receives an influx of stomps and kicks to the chest. After delivering a fist-drop, thinking he has his long-time opponent knocked unconscious, Stevie rises and turns towards the corner. In here, he steps out onto the apron and begins to elevate himself to the top turnbuckle pad...

Steve Hebert: Lacklan is beginning to stir, though...

Lex Robinson: I saw. If Stevie wants to succeed, he had better get moving, or do something...

Just as that's said, Lacklan sits up, eyeing Stevie Swing on the top turnbuckle pad. Before Stevie can stand, an incensed Jean-Paul Lacklan gets to his feet and charges into the corner, headed towards Stevie Swing.

Steve Hebert: He's up... and he's headed directly toward Stevie Swing!

Lex Robinson: Running in, Jean-Paul Lacklan connects with a leaping Enziguiri to the side of Stevie Swing's head! Due to exhaustion, Stevie wasn't able to stand in time. As a result, he receives a brutal back-brain kick, knocking him off the top rope, crashing him onto the canvas!

Steve Hebert: Shut the fuck up, Lacklan is laying his right arm across Stevie's chest...

The count is made...

...1...2...

Lex Robinson: One... two...

Steve Hebert: Lacklan's going to do it! He's going to win the second-ever match between Stevie and himself!

...

Lex Robinson: ...No! Stevie Swing, at the last possible second, drapes his left leg across the bottom rope!

Steve Hebert: Oh, fuck me.

Lex Robinson: What a way to start a Pay Per View! This match must go on!

At approximately the same time, Stevie and Lacklan rise, with each man using the adjacent set of ropes to help themselves up. Stumbling out, they go back-to-back, causing them to instantly whip around and punch each other at the same time, resulting in both being sent back with a shockwave of pain coursing through their skull.

Steve Hebert: Well Jesus, they strike each other at the same time.

Lex Robinson: They even charge at each other...!

Steve Hebert: Lacklan with a roaring-elbow directly to Stevie's face! That knocks Stevie back against the ropes, leaving him complete flustered... and probably even dead. That Jew nose will be picked no longer.

Lex Robinson: Grabbing Stevie's head, Lacklan delivers one more forearm and then whips him across the ring. Upon Stevie's rebound, Jean-Paul ducks down, looking for a backdrop... but Stevie has other plans! Upon his return, instead of going up-and-over Lacklan's back, Stevie opts to strike with a reeling kick, which knocks Lacklan off his game!

Steve Hebert: Oh God, Lacklan's head snapped back. Did you see that?

Lex Robinson: I did!

Steve Hebert: This is not good!

Lex Robinson: Stevie stands back... and then darts forward, extending his right leg, going for THe Last Dance!

Steve Hebert: But he's unable to fully hit it, just like the last time! As Stevie's foot torpedoes towards Lord Lacklan's face, Lacklan reaches up, grabs onto Stevie's foot and thwarts all possible danger! Using Stevie's leg as leverage, he proceeds to spin Stevie around and then knee him in the kidneys!

Lex Robinson: This is not looking good for Stevie Swing... Lacklan has him locked into a reverse-facelock. This is usually a prelude to lifting his opponent up and then dropping him/her on their head with a reverse-brainbuster...

Just as Lex says, Jean-Paul Lacklan lifts Stevie Swing upside-down, holding him vertically up into a reverse-brainbuster position. As the seconds pass, though, Stevie begins wiggling and kicking his feet, looking to remove himself from this disastrous situation...

Lex Robinson: Wait, look... using his own writhing momentum, Stevie Swing is able to wiggle his way over Lacklan's shoulder, as if he were some sort of snake. On his own two feet, Stevie pushes Lacklan into the ropes, forcing him to rebound out...

Steve Hebert: Slightly confused, Jean-Paul Lacklan comes storming back; and oh... oh no...

Lex Robinson: He walks right into The Last Dance superkick! Stevie Swing drops down, his back covering Lacklan's chest...!

The count is made...

...1...

Lex Robinson: ...One...

...2...

Lex Robinson: ...Two...

Steve Hebert: This can't happen!

...3...!

Lex Robinson: Three! He's done it! Stevie Swing has done it! Making his official return, Stevie Swing has defeated his longtime rival, Jean-Paul Lacklan.

Steve Hebert: I blame all of this on There Will Be Blood.

Lex Robinson: Victorious, Stevie Swing goes to stand, but he is far too spent. Both he and Lacklan remain on the canvas, barely moving. Nevertheless, the referee walks over to Stevie, grabs his hand and holds it in the air, signifying him as the victor. Now this is how you start off a show.

Steve Hebert: It's only done nothing but agitate and annoy me. Now how I want to start things.

Lex Robinson: Uh oh. That's never good.

The first to move is Jean-Paul Lacklan, who rolls out onto the floor, with his mask intact, holding the side of his head. He halts himself, thinking about gaining revenge on Stevie for the victory, but he realizes there will be another day. Not only that, but he realizes that he has a second match tonight, making him wisely walk to the back.

Steve Hebert: Don't worry. We'll see Jean-Paul later tonight. And I guarantee a win... or I'll eat my dirty, cum-encrusted sock.

The cameras show Lacklan walking to the back; and then directs their attention to Stevie Swing, who is just now rising to his feet.

Winner: Stevie Swing

The image goes to the back, where "The Creep" Chris Carson is shown entering the building, fresh off trying to run Morgana over. Across his head is a bandage, showing signs of the damage done to him by Jay and Andrew Keller at the last Eternity. With the usual sour expression on his face, "The Creep" rounds a corner and notices Jean-Paul Lacklan returning from the ringside area.

Calmly stepping up to the masked Lacklan, Chris Carson stares him down, with Lacklan looking back at him; neither man uttering a single word. After rubbing his head, Chris Carson pipes in.

Chris Carson: I know you still have one more match to go tonight; but I just want to let you know...

"The Creep" silences for a moment, taking a second to rub his chin.

Chris Carson: If you ever try to horn in on my property, you'll regret it. You know who I'm talking about. Tonight is the night that I destroy Morgana. Not you; but me.

Chris Carson goes to walk off, but before he gets anywhere, he stops. He talks once more.

Chris Carson: By the way, when you get into the ring with that slut, Jay, later in the evening... feel free to destroy her. Shit down her throat, if you have to.

Smugly walking off, Chris Carson leaves Jean-Paul Lacklan behind, watching "The Creep" walk off, sans emotion.

Debut Match

Iced Earth’s “Stand Alone” kicks in full force throughout the arena and the fans rise to their feet to jeer the imminent arrival of Hysteria. A burst of pyro at the top of the ramp accompanies the change in rhythm and sure enough Hysteria steps out from the back, paying absolutely no attention whatsoever to the negative reaction of the crowd.

Hysteria soon reaches the bottom of the ramp and hops up onto the apron before slipping in through the top two ropes. He paces around the ring, ready to go.

Lex Robinson: The scourge cometh... those are the words of the man known as Hysteria! He is a puzzle, he is an enigma! And he feels he is going to usher in a new era to SW!

Steve Hebert: Tommy Slayer says HIS new man, his new MONSTER, will bring in an new era to Sin Wrestling! Ha ha! Yes! I think that this new monster will be as welcome here as a dog in a bowling alley!

The arena lights dim as 'Lass uns Tanzen" by Scooters begins to slowly filter throughout the arena. The song plays for nearly a full minute, giving the audience a sight to behold. The lights flickering in a multitude of colors: azure, purple, yellow and rose, the cyclical light pattern keeping in step with the beat of the song. The air and aura of an almost rave type of setting., a complete and utter spectacle. Q finally steps out through the curtains, onto the main stage.

Looking out over the audience, he is flanked on either side by two rather gorgeous female companions. Both made up rather heavily, as is he...both his arms are interlocked around theirs as he begins to stride smoothly down the ramp way, towards the ring. His face showing a calm and almost apathetic expression, his half-lidded eyes flit back and forth amongst the crowd but never really acknowledging any of them.

The women release their grasp on his arms, as he extends them out to both sides and gestures quickly in a wide manner. The escorts take the silent command and retreat to the back rather sexily, with some audience members following them out, while most continue to focus on Q.

Walking up the ring steps and standing in the middle of the apron nearest the entrance, he wipes his feet on the mat a few times before stepping through the middle and top rope. Already beginning to strip his black tuxedo jacket from his body, he places it gently over the top rope, into the ring girl's arms... even blowing her a soft kiss. His index finger and thumb coming to his chin as he strides to the center of the ring, almost appearing to ponder, as he slowly turns his gaze to his opponents.

Steve Hebert: One Minute 'Til Minute! The Devil's hour! Isn't that what Tommy Slayer kept hinting at? Satan! Devil worship! What the hell, pardon the pun, is going down here in Sin Wrestling? Who are these men and what does their inclusion into this great stable of talent, this great roster of superstars, what does it mean? Some of those answers we WILL have for you tonight.

...1...2...

Steve Hebert: The dummy only gets a two!

The fans are audibly loud after that big move and Hysteria feeds off of it, as he picks Chaz up and connects with a Fireman's Carry Suplex.

...1... 2...!

Steve Hebert: The masked-man, Hysteria, kicks out! He wears a mask probably because he's ugly, but I digress.

Lex Robinson: The ref goes down to make the count, but Q breaks it up with a boot the the face of Hysteria...!

The pale faced mystery man kicks Chaz in the back and then grabs Hysteria by the hair only to get a thumb to the throat and a quick DDT.

The referee pushes Hysteria out of the way and hits the mat...

...1...2...3!

Lex Robinson: That's it! Q wins the triple threat match! He pins Chaz Leland as the referee was too busy with Hysteria!

Lex Robinson: That takes the cake! Hysteria walks out of the ring leaving Q behind in his wake! But Q wins the match! What does this mean for Q and Hysteria? Will Q just forgive and forget? He won his first match, on PPV no less, here in Sin Wrestling! But he gets laid out by Hysteria to ruin the celebration... sad indeed!

As Hysteria walks to the back, upset about the loss, he turns around and looks at Q, who is just now getting back to his feet. Q, looking angry about the surprise attack, keeps an eye on Hysteria, as he walks through the curtain. Chaz Leland, on the other hand, is not very well.

Winner: Q

The image returns to the backstage area, where the camera focuses on Generic Heel, who is doing cock-pushups on the floor.

Generic Heel: ...Number 498...

Another cock-pushup.

Generic Heel: ...Number 499...

One more...

Generic Heel: ...Number 500!

Before he can rise, someone's foot steps on Generic Heel's head, smushing his face into the floor; followed by a high-heel to the back, and then another large, gelatinous boot. The forms of current the World Champion, Chris Extreme, Booger and Mercedes are shown, stopping to mingle and chat about his upcoming title defense.

Chris Extreme: All right, you guys, I killed that faggot, Declan Turner, so now I have no opponent.

This makes Booger speak up.

Booger: Uh, you didn't kill him. He was injured... and by Morgana, not you. And I'm replacing him in the match because you requested it!

Chris Extreme: ...Oh yeah. Good call, fatty. Remember what I said, too. When I punch you in the big old tits, you fall to the ground. You got me?

Booger: But... but... but...

Chris stuffs a sandwich down Booger's mouth.

Chris Extreme: Listen, just do as I say. Now go get ready.

Booger: Mkmmfppff--

Unable to talk, due to the sandwich stuff in his maw, Booger is turned away by Chris Extreme, who pushes him off, leaving him alone with Mercedes.

Mercedes: What if he doesn't comply? What if he actually tries to beat you -- or even worse -- sit on you. I mean, if he sits on you, there's no way I'm kissing you for a week.

Chris Extreme: No worries, sweet-tits, I've got this all under control.

Mercedes: What do you mean? Are you hiding secrets from me?!

She goes to strike Chris with her pink purse, which has her cat, John Locke popping from it. However, before she can strike, Chris relents, with terror in his eyes.

Chris Extreme: No, no! I'd never do that!

Instead, he offers her something much more pleasing...

Chris Extreme: Now let's make out; and have you suck my cock.

Mercedes: But don't I have a match?!

Chris Extreme: Your match is in a minute. Trust me, we've got time.

Mercedes: Okay then!

Chris grabs Mercedes by the hand and they prance off. Generic Heel, on the other hand, is able to peel himself off the floor, footprinks on the back of his mask and suit. He stumbles awkwardly around, throwing punches at the air and threatening broomsticks, which mean no harm. At this rate, he'll be lucky to get to the ring without punching a fan in the face.

$25,000 First Fall Wins

Say say my playmate
Won't you lay hands on me?

TRANSFER MY TRAGEDY!

my mind's aflame

We could jet in a stolen car
But I bet we wouldn't get too far
BEFORE THE TRANSFORMATION TAKES!
AND BLOODLUST TANKS AND CRAVE GETS SLAKED!

Lex Robinson: There's Tony Millennia, who thinks wrestling is dead and is only wrestling for the money now. Another $25,000 he'd like to win tonight.

Steve Hebert: Screw him. I can't wait for Generic Heel to come out.

Generic Heel walks to the ring next, with no music.

Lex Robinson: What an entrance!

Steve Hebert: Agreed.

"Drift and Die" by Puddle of Mudd plays, bringing out the next competitor, Andrew Keller. He enters the ring and eyes down Tony Millennia and Generic Heel.

Lex Robinson: Only one more person left. A woman...

Steve Hebert: Titties!

"Into the Darkness" by Kittie plays and Mercedes comes out, holding pink pom-poms and wearing a pink tiara, with a swastika. She walks down the ramp with John Locke, the kitten, sitting on her shoulder, with John Locke jumping off before she enters the ring. She lurks around at ringside, while she throws her pink pom-poms into the crowd, in disgust, and sets her pink tiara aside.

Steve Hebert: Chris Extreme's girlfriend is so, so hot.

Lex Robinson: She's young enough to be your daughter, Steve.

Steve Hebert: God, I wish she was.

Lex Robinson: ...I don't want to know.

The match starts off with Mercedes tackling Generic Heel. She mounts him and begins to bitch slap him repeatedly across the face.

Lex Robinson: Confused, Generic Heel does not understand why he is being attacked so viciously, and retaliates by poking her in the eye, trying to turn her into skittles.

Steve Hebert: Skittles, eh?

Lex Robinson: Yes, skittles.

As these two battle, Keller and Millennia exchange a series of punches. Keller whips Millennia off the ropes and lifts him up, smashing his back with his trademark spine buster. Already, Keller hooks Millennia's leg, going for a pin. Spotting this, Mercedes gets off of Generic Heel and leaps onto the pin, breaking it up before even a one count, with Millennia kicking out, anyhow.

Lex Robinson: Much too early for a pinfall. That was a mistake on the part of Andrew Keller.

Steve Hebert: An idiotic mistake. Nobody ever said Andrew Keller was bright.

Keller swings at Mercedes with a punch, but she ducks out of the way. Bouncing off the ropes, she returns with a front handspring that turns into a hurricanrana on Keller. Pinning his shoulders down, Mercedes awaits the referee's count, but Generic Heel easily pulls her off of Keller.

Lex Robinson: Mercedes can't even get a one count on Keller, thanks to Generic Heel.

Steve Hebert: Holy shit, do those retards in the ring realize that there is four of each other?

Sitting up to her knees, Mercedes does a cheerleading pom pom motion with her hands, and punches General Heel directly in the balls! Falling on his butt, Generic Heel squirms around while holding his sore testicles.

Lex Robinson: Ouch! No! She cheated... a Pom Pom punch to the testicles!

Steve Hebert: Yes! Go Nazi Queen!

Lex Robinson: Hey... wait a minute... is that John Locke the kitten climbing the turnbuckle?!

A camera focuses in on Locke, who has sneakily climbed up to the top rope. In the meantime, Keller grabs Mercedes and scoops her up. He attempts to body slam her, but John Locke the kitten springs forward and latches onto Keller's face. He scratches up Keller's face, who shouts and drops Mercedes. Furious, Keller peels Locke off of his face and throws him at Generic Heel!

Lex Robinson: Now Locke the kitten is locked onto Generic Heel's face! Why is the referee allowing this?

Steve Hebert: Because the referee is laughing! God this place is fucked up; I love it!

Generic Heel tosses the psychotic cat out of the ring. Feeling like he put her kitty in danger, Mercedes executes a back handspring and elbows Generic Heel in the face. When Mercedes turns around, she is laid out with a clothesline from Keller. In the meantime, Tony Millennia boredly exits the ring. He looks under the ring apron for something...

Lex Robinson: This isn't a hardcore match. What is Millennia looking for?

Steve Hebert: Probably drugs.

Instead, Millennia drags out a chessboard. He begins to set up the pieces.

Lex Robinson: A chessboard?!

Steve Hebert: Tony Millennia can't play chess against himself. It isn't fucking Solitaire!

Millennia calls out Locke the kitten, who accepts his challenge. Locke walks over and sits his butt down on the other side of the chessboard. Locke sits in front of the white pieces and Millennia plays as the black pieces.

Lex Robinson: This is ridiculous! We have a wrestling match in the ring!

Steve Hebert: Rook takes pawn! Fuck yeah!

Inside of the ring, Generic Heel is getting stomped on repeatedly by Keller while Mercedes is bent over applying titty twisters to him. Generic Heel cries out in pain, but this is far from teamwork by Keller and Mercedes. Turning her wrath away from Generic Heel, Mercedes snatches Keller's nipples, and twists them around. Keller shouts out in pain, and then gets drop kicked into the corner. Running forward, Mercedes knees Keller in the crotch, dropping him on his butt against the bottom turnbuckle.

Lex Robinson: Mercedes has taken control. Now what is she going to do?

Steve Hebert: She has climbed the turnbuckle. She is perched up there like a bird...

Lex Robinson: Mercedes somersaults off of the top rope and lands a legdrop across Generic Heel's neck!

Mercedes covers Generic Heel. The referee drops down and counts...

...1...2...

Crawling away from the corner, Keller lunges forward and breaks up the count.

Lex Robinson: A close call! Keller barely stops Mercedes from winning $25,000!

Steve Hebert: That's like five years of rent money! Chris Extreme is going to be pissed!

Turning his eyes to the outside of the ring, Keller finds Millennia and Locke playing chess. Locke paws one of his white rooks forward and takes out one of Millennia's black pawns. Displeased by Millennia's apathy to the match, Keller leaves the ring and walks up to the chessboard. He kicks the chessboard across the floor and elbows Millennia in the head, before tossing him into the ring. Locke scurries away.

Lex Robinson: Keller stops the chess match. Thank God, too; now we can get back to wrestling.

Steve Hebert: Damn. We'll never know who the better chess player was -- Tony Millennia or John Locke.

Lex Robinson: Since when did cats understand the concept of chess, Steve?

Steve Hebert: The island taught John Locke.

Lex Robinson: What? What island?

Inside of the ring, Keller strikes Millennia with a hellacious punch to the face, known as the "Mouthpiece." This knocks out Millennia on his back. Generic Heel attempts an attack on Keller from behind, but Keller swings around and knocks him down with a Mouthpiece punch.

Lex Robinson: Two Mouthpieces! Andrew Keller is taking everyone out.

Steve Hebert: How horrendous!

Mercedes charges Keller, but Keller sidesteps her and throws her out of the ring. With everyone down, Keller pins Millennia... ...1...

Lex Robinson: ...One...

Steve Hebert: No!

...2...

Lex Robinson: ...Two...

Steve Hebert: Here comes Mercedes!

Mercedes quickly slides back into the ring, and jumps at the cover...

...3!

Lex Robinson: Three! Mercedes is too late! Andrew Keller has picked up the victory.

Steve Hebert: Awful. I would have rather watched chess.

Lex Robinson: Like it or not, Andrew Keller has just won $25,000. After the match, Andrew Keller stands to his feet, receiving a briefcase full of money from the referee. Angrily plucking it away, Andrew exits the ring and walks to the backs, glad to be that much richer. As for the other three, they remain in the ring, looking upset about their loss.

Winner: Andrew Keller

We go backstage, to the break room, where Booger can be seen in the background, devouring the food in preparation for his epic encounter with Chris Extreme later tonight. Sebastian York is shown walking through the room with a cup of coffee in his hands. He turns around to head for the door, only to be run into by a black-haired woman. The coffee winds up spilling all over York.

Sebastian York: Jesus, watch where you’re going!

Woman: I’m sorry. You wouldn’t happen to know where Morgana’s dressing room is, would you?

Sebastian York: Why? Are you her makeup person or something?

Woman: No…I’m Stevie Swing.

Sebastian laughs.

Stevie Swing: No really…I am. What’s so hard to believe about that?

Sebastian York: There’s no way. You? Stevie Swing? Stevie Swing was a man, man.

Stevie Swing: There’s a difference between dressing like a man and being a man, Sebby.

Sebastian York: But I shoved that dildo in your mouth because I thought it would be demeaning! Now it turns out that you probably liked it?

Stevie Swing: I dunno…there’s a lot about facing you that I can’t be bothered to remember.

Sebastian York: Really? But I beat you in that ladder match!

Stevie Swing: Yeah…I was probably hormonal or something. No hard feelings?

Sebastian York: Uhh…

Stevie Swing: I’ll let you touch my boobs? They’re real…swear to God.

Sebastian York: Well…

Sebastian looks around…then tries to sneak a feel without anybody noticing. Out of the corner of her eye, Stevie sees a flash of pink hair.

Stevie Swing: Oh shit, Morgy! Gotta go!

She bolts off, leaving York hanging.

Sebastian York: For the love of fuck!

#1 Contender to Impulse Title

Lex Robinson: It’s time to decide to the number one contender to the Impulse championship!

Steve Hebert: Whoop-ee.

Lex Robinson: You don’t seem to thrilled about it, Herbie.

Steve Hebert: Nah. I’m stoked. It’s just the tranquillizers.

Lex Robinson: ...What?

The arena erupts into a sea of boos, as "Bitch" by Sevendust begins to blare across the P.A. system. Aaron Joseph emerges onto the entrance way, wearing a black "Simply Fucking Amazing" t-shirt and his black tights with gold flakes on them. He stands atop the entranceway and glares out into the crowd. He then continues down the entrance ramp and makes his way to ringside, where he slides into the ring, hops to his feet and circles the ring, throwing his arms up intoo the air. Aaron smirks as rests in the corner and awaits the start of the match.

Lex Robinson: Aaron Joseph, everybody! He’s simply fucking amazing!

Steve Hebert: About as amazing as my balls in your mouth.

Jean-Paul Lacklan's entrance music is Beethoven's "Moonlight Sonata," as performed by the indy rock group The Inverse. As the song begins to play, the house-lights shut off, with purple lights showing the entrance ramp. Several of his Minions, his fans, then come out, each dressed in a long black robe and hood. They line the entranceway as Lacklan appears at the top of the ramp, a purple spotlight illuminating him.

Steve Hebert: Quite possibly the gayest entrance known to mankind.

As Lacklan makes his way down the aisle, the Minions bow to him and exit. Upon approach of the ring, Lacklan ascends the steps and climbs into the ring. As his name is announced, he flings back the cowl and rips off the hood in one fluid motion, revealing his classic mask and scarred head.

Lex Robinson: Well, Jean-Paul won’t be winning any beauty contests but he is a fierce competitor!

Steve Hebert: I bet he looks like an alligator.

The lights dim and "Swamped" by Lacuna Coil begins to play. Jay walks out wearing a black leather, single-sleeved halter-top with matching hip hugger pants, black winged tipped boots, and black fingerless arm-bands. She walks down the ramp, ignoring the crowd, and slides underneath the ropes. She then proceeds to her respective corner.

Steve Hebert: God! I’d love to rotate that bitch’s tires.

Lex Robinson: Now I know why they only let us do pay per views.

The bell sounds. All three competitors circle the ring and wait for the first move. Jean-Paul immediately dashes at Aaron Joseph and sends him down to the canvas with a brutal clothesline. Jay runs behind Lacklan and kicks him right in the heel of his foot. Jean-Paul stumbles into the ropes and is knocked right over the top rope with a dropkick to his back!

Steve Hebert: That’s one mean piece of ass, Lex.

Lacklan is sprawled out of the apron as Jay turns around to meet a freshly standing Joseph with a kick to the stomach. Jay follows up with a sharp slap across Aaron’s chest and grabs ahold of his arm shortly thereafter. Jay flings Joseph across the ring with a beautiful Japanese armdrag. Lacklan rolls under the bottom rope and back into the ring as well.

Lex Robinson: Jay has been impressive lately.

Steve Hebert: She'd be more impressive if she wrestled naked.

Lex Robinson: Like Chris Extreme?

Steve Hebert: Now you're talking.

Lex Robinson: Jay stands up to her feet and hurries to Lacklan. Lacklan is just about to his feet when Jay spins around and rocks him with a spinning back-fist. Jean-Paul slouches against the ropes as Jay loads up her right hand for a hard punch. She never gets the chance for Lacklan sends a vicious slap across her face. This slap absolutely floors Jay to the mat.

Steve Hebert: Haha! Bitch better have his money!

Lacklan sends a foot down into Jay for good measure before turning his attention to Aaron Joseph. Joseph tries a kick, but it’s caught and Lacklan merely pushes Aaron back into the turnbuckles. He quickly unloads with a series of punches and elbows into Joseph, completely assaulting him with this barrage, resulting in Aaron stumbling out of the corner, breathless. Jean-Paul backs away to give Joseph some breathing room.

Lex Robinson: Lacklan actually gives Joseph a break?

Steve Hebert: Stupid nig.

Lex Robinson: Say what?

Steve Hebert: Errr... dumb goth.

Lacklan dashes back into the corner and makes Joseph eat his boot with a stiff Yazuka kick. Snapping back, Joseph almost flies right out of the ring, before dropping onto his ass in the corner.

Lex Robinson: Jean-Paul Lacklan, who is wrestling his second match of the evening...

Steve Hebert: I still can't believe he lost to that... that... that thing!

Lex Robinson: Errr... yeah... anyhow, Jean-Paul listens to the crowd’s pop before sending a final kick down onto a helpless Joseph. However, Jay, from out of nowhere, dashes at Lacklan and swings her arm for a clothesline.

Lex Robinson: Jean-Paul ducks low and Jay continues to dash into the ropes!

Steve Hebert: Watch it...!

Lex Robinson: She hits them and comes bouncing off. Seeing this, Lacklan spins, attempting his Roaring Elbow... only to have Jay duck herself!

Steve Hebert: That was the same move he hit earlier on Stevie Swing...

Lex Robinson: Except he hit it, then.

By the time Lacklan turns to face Jay, she gives Jean-Paul a brutal kick right to the gonads.

Steve Hebert: Ugh...

Lex Robinson: Counter-after-counter, followed up by a nasty kick to the fellas.

Steve Hebert: You usually have to pay for that type of action, Lex.

Lex Robinson: ...

Jean-Paul is on his knees and groveling in agony before catching both of Jay’s feet in his face with a dropkick. She covers the downed Lacklan, almost immediately.

...1...2...

Lex Robinson: Nope! Lacklan easily muscles out of the cover.

Steve Hebert: Angered, Jay slaps the mat a few times, before making it back to her feet. In time, Lacklan hurries to his own feet as the two engage in a grapple. Here we go, beat her down.

Lex Robinson: Steve Hebert accepts violence against women.

Steve Hebert: Damn right I do!

Lex Robinson: Lacklan gets the upper hand and slings Jay to the mat with a hip toss. Joseph, finally trying to mount some sort of offense, charges at Lacklan from the side, only to be kicked right in the face with a big boot! Aaron hits the mat with a thud as Lacklan smirks.

Steve Hebert: That Joseph guy is getting thrown around like a Cambodian prostitute, Lex. My God.

Jay and Lacklan start to go at it again. Jay sends a couple punches into Jean-Paul’s stomach and finishes with a snap-mare, barely able to get the big man down. As soon as Lacklan hits his bottom on the canvas, Jay reaches down and grabs his hair. Lacklan struggles for a second before the sly lady bounces the back of his head off the canvas. She lifts his head up again and slams it into the mat for a second time, and a second sickening thud!

Lex Robinson: She’s really putting it to Jean-Paul now.

Steve Hebert: This is ridiculous! He wrestled earlier in the evening, anyhow! It's not his fault!

Jay is just about to drop another move on Lacklan, when Aaron Joseph finally does something offensive. He manages to grab Jay by her long hair and tug it. Jay winces in pain, as Joseph slings her over the top rope and to the outside.

Steve Hebert: Out goes the Bitch. Hell, Aaron Joseph squeals loudly and starts throwing his arms like Rocky. This is a big time moment for him. He even shouts something aloud!

Aaron Joseph: SIMPLY THE BEST, BABY! DIDN’T YOU HEAR ME EARLIER?

Steve Hebert: Hahaha! He’s simply the best, bitches!

Aaron Joseph’s party is cut-short when he’s grabbed from behind. Lacklan wraps his arm around the neck of Joseph and hoists him up into the air. He holds Joseph in the air with his impressive strength, letting all that blood rush to his head. Joseph wiggles and tries anything to get free but it’s not meant to be, Lacklan drills Aaron into the mat with his finisher; The Final Rite.

Lex Robinson: That was a nasty fall! He got dropped on his head hard there, Steve.

Steve Hebert: He’ll feel that shit tomorrow. For sure.

Jean-Paul lays his body on top of the lifeless body of Aaron Joseph for the cover. Jay is trying to make it to her feet on the outside, but having some difficulty. The official starts to count the pinfall...

Lex Robinson: The cover is made...

...1...

Steve Hebert: Jay is trying to get back in...

Lex Robinson: She is going to have to hurry!

Jay is to her feet, now, and grabbing ahold of the apron. She’s got a good grip on it and starts to lift her leg up to slide on in.

Steve Hebert: Come on, girl! Pretend Andrew Keller's cock is in the ring!

...2...

Jay manages to get in the ring. She tries to move forward, but finds standing is a little hard to do. She wobbles on her feet for a half-second before regaining her composure. She launches her body into the air towards the area where Lacklan is covering Joseph.

Lex Robinson: She's not gonna make it...!

...3...!

Steve Hebert: Well shit.

Lex Robinson: Oh no! She’s just a moment too late!

Jay crashes right into Lacklan and knocks him off Joseph, but it’s in vain. The referee has already counted the three for Jean Paul. Jean gets to his feet and throws his hands in the air in victory. Jay slaps the mat in disgust and looks down at Aaron Joseph, who’s still seeing stars. She slaps Joseph right in the face before crawling outside of the ring.

Lex Robinson: It was a good effort. I’m sure we’ll be hearing a lot more about Jay in the near future.

Steve Hebert: Fuckin' Aaron Joseph, man...

Jean-Paul is still in celebration mode and is now the number one contender to the Impulse championship. Lacklan celebrates for a little longer before we cut backstage.

Winner: Jean-Paul Lacklan

Morgana stands in the back, still a little frazzled from what happened earlier, with Chris Carson aiming his car at her. She is preparing for her big match tonight, only to be interrupted when she hears someone holler out to her.

Corey Page: Morgy! Morgy! Oh, Morgy, you're alive! I had the worst dream. I dreamt that I was talking to you on the cellphone, with my cock hanging out of my dirty boxers, and then you went off the road. And Luxe died. Poor little Luxe. Oh, and I think you might have died, too... but poor Luxe! I can't believe you're okay.

Looking oddly at Corey Page, who wraps his arm around Morgana, happily hugging her, Morgana pops an eyebrow up and wonders what to say.

Morgana: Uh, no, I'm still alive... well, no thanks to that dirtbag pedophile, Chris Carson. Did you see him try to run me over earlier?!

A blank stare is on Corey Page's face.

Corey Page: ...So Luxe is okay?

Morgana: Ugh.

Morgana goes to turn away, hoping to return to her own business, but she is stopped by Corey Page, who puts his hand on her shoulder, turning her around.

Corey Page: Wait!

Corey hands her a laptop computer.

Corey Page: Now, you know what you must do.

Corey pulls out his own laptop computer, while unzipping his pants.

Morgana: This is disgusting.

In response to that, Corey Page wipes his dirty, uncircumsized cock off Morgana's leg and pouts.

Corey Page: Fine, fuck you.

Morgana: My God, don't touch me with that oily, scaly thing.

He zips it back up and somberly walks away... but not before Morgana uses her laptop to write "Chris Carson is a fag" over and over into her online blog. Fade out.

Stevie Swing is seen continuing her manhunt for Morgana throughout the backstage area. She walks past a payphone, where Chris Carson is trying to make a call.

Chris Carson: Fucking Canadian phones…hey bitch!

Stevie stops and turns around.

Stevie Swing: What?

Chris Carson: You wouldn’t happen to have any Canadian money?

Stevie Swing: I might.

Chris Carson: Fan-fucking-tastic. Finally a bitch that’s useful. I’ve been trying to call Pinky for days.

Stevie Swing: Morgana?

Chris Carson: Yeah. You a fan or something? I’ll leave you dead on her doorstep.

Stevie Swing: You’d have to dye my hair pink to make it just the right shade of ironic though, right?

Chris Carson: Beautician school’s gotta pay off sometime.

Stevie Swing: Right. Do you happen to know where Morgana is?

Chris Carson: If I did, do you think I’d be spending all my money trying to call her?

Stevie Swing: Probably. It’s not like you were able to say it all those times she was making you suck your own cock or anything…

Chris Carson: Who in the fuck do you think you are?

Stevie Swing: Stevie Swing, ever-lovin’, blue eyed Dancing King…err…Queen. I need a better nickname.

Chris Carson: Stevie Swing? You mean to tell me that the Wifeys got you so pussy-whipped that you went and had your pecker cut off? I knew you were a quitter on me, Swinger, but on your gender?

Stevie Swing: No, I’m pretty sure I’ve always had a vagina.

Chris Carson: Really?

Stevie checks herself, pulling the waistband of her pants out a bit.

Stevie Swing: Yep…all natural.

Chris Carson: I-

Stevie Swing: I don’t have any money, either. Get fucked, Creep.

Swing walks away, leaving Carson to continue searching for Canadian coinage.

Impulse Title Match

All My Life I been searching for something...
Something never comes, never leads to nothing...
Nothing satisfies, but I'm gettin close...
Closer to the prize at the end of the rope

The words MADE FOR TV appear on the screen as the lights in the arena slowly began to dim and "All My Life" by the Foo Fighters progresses on. An array of baby blue lasers shoot into various directions, moving about, in time with the rhythm of the music.

As the song drops in, explosions go off, as Sebastian York makes his way to the top of the ramp, rocking out to the music. He hops up and down atop the ramp before bursting into a full sprint towards the ring.

Sliding into the ring, he pops up onto his feet and lifts both of his hands into the air, drawing a huge pop from the crowd as pyro shoots into the air from the each corner. As the pyro display dies down, Sebastian nods to the referee and waits for his match to begin.

Steve Hebert: Oh, look. Another York.

Lex Robinson: That's the ORIGINAL York, Steve. Sebastian York's here to clear his good name in an Impulse Title match against Jayson Keller!

Steve Hebert: What good name? A York is a York. Nathan York and Adrian York sucked at wrestling. Naturally that ought to mean that all Yorks suck at wrestling.

Lex Robinson: Say what you will about the name "York", but Sebastian does need to get back onto the winning track. He put up valiant efforts in losses against Chris Carson and Corey Ashton, but a loss is a loss.

Some gameshow music is heard and Jayson Keller prances out, wearing a sparkly, shiny jacket, which he removes once he's inside the ring. Preparing for his match, he eyes the Impulse Title, wanting to take it away from Sebastian York and show him that the Kellers are still superior than every York.

Steve Hebert: Now HERE is an original! Keller's due to get himself some gold.

Lex Robinson: We'll see about that. Keller had his own winning streak snapped against Declan Turner a few weeks ago.

Steve Hebert: Like anyone remembers that! Declan ought to get all of his victories wiped out for wussing out on the World Title. I tell you, Chris Extreme would have wrestled with THREE broken arms!

York quickly slides out of the ring, not waiting for Keller to enter the ring before starting to pummel him! The two exchange punches back and forth on the entrance ramp. Keller finally manages a finger in York's eye, then whips the Impulse Champ into the ring steps before the bell can even ring.

Lex Robinson: Keller wasting no time at pulling out the cheap shots.

Steve Hebert: Hey, that's an unwritten rule in wrestling. You ought to be able to do what you can before the bell rings.

Keller pulls York up and slides him into the ring, following him in to continue with stomps to York's back. Keller starts to focus on a particular spot, bouncing off the ropes and laying elbows repeatedly against York's back.

Lex Robinson: Keller's doing to York what he's done to many of his opponents. He's targeting the spot that he doesn't want York using.

Steve Hebert: Beat on it enough, and York will have to resort to other ways for finishing Keller off. As if he would be able to.

Lex Robinson: Let's not speak too soon, Steve. Sebastian's making his comeback!

York manages to roll away after Keller attempts a third elbow to the back! York finally gets back to his feet, holding his back. Keller quickly gets to his feet and attempts a punch, but York ducks and grabs hold of Keller, tossing him over his head with a huge T-bone suplex!

Steve Hebert: Stupid move! That's gonna seriously fuck up York's back.

York does grab at his back, hunched over as he recovers from that suplex. York gets to his feet and starts to unload kicks at the back of Keller's head, saving his movements for now. He drags Keller up to his feet and tosses him to the ropes, attempting a running Facebuster, only to get a heelkick from Keller to the chin!

Steve Hebert: Keller with the pin!

...1...2...

Lex Robinson: Oh, York kicks out right after the two count!

Steve Hebert: Damnit. Get that metrosexual out of here.

Keller is pushed to the side as York kicks out. York tries to recover, but Keller goes right into a headlock, trying to keep York planted to the mat and his body wedged against York's back. York shakes off any attempts at a submission, managing to get up to both knees. He starts to clobber Keller in the midsection with elbows, then manages to push Keller against the ropes...

Lex Robinson: Keller bounces right back into a sidewalk slam! York with the cover!

...1...!

Steve Hebert: Keller's not weak enough to get pinned from that!

Keller kicks out early and sits up quickly. York starts to pound at the back of Keller's neck with stiff punches, then pulls Keller up, flattening him with a neckbreaker. He goes back for the pin!

...1...2...

Lex Robinson: One... two... no! Keller's back up from that attempt!

Steve Hebert: Gonna take more than that to beat him.

Lex Robinson: But York's got the right idea now! He's targeting Keller's own back and shoulders! That ought to even the score!

Steve Hebert: This ain't boxing, Lex. You don't get scores from punches landed. York's gonna have to pin Keller.

Keller seems to have had enough of being in the ring for a moment. He slides out of the ring to catch his breath, but York chases after him. York looks to hit Keller with a clothesline, but Keller dodges the bullet with a drop-toe-hold, and York's forehead busts hard against a ringpost!

Lex Robinson: York's starting to bleed from his forehead!

Steve Hebert: He should have stayed in the ring where it was safe!

Keller gets his opportunity and pounds harder against York's back with stomps. he slides into the ring, then back out to get a few more shots. Soon, he has York back in the ring, smirking smugly to the crowd as he pins York.

Lex Robinson: A pretty limp cover by Keller...

...1...2...

Steve Hebert: Speaking of limp, York kicks out at two! Man, can someone tell York he's bleeding all over the ring? We need to keep it clean for the other carnage tonight! Like seeing Morgy get her vagina split open!

Lex Robinson: Eh, we'll see...

York is groggy as Keller lifts him to a vertical stance. Keller sizes up York for a superkick, but York ducks his head out of the way! He turns about and floors Keller with a spinning heel kick!

Steve Hebert: No, Jayse! Go for the jugular! DDT him!

Lex Robinson: York's now got control of the flow, despite blood dripping down his face!

Steve Hebert: Time out! Time out! C'mon, they call time outs in basketball when the guy's bleeding!

Lex Robinson: York drags Keller back to his feet and gets him into a standing head-scissors...Keller's up...and now down with a Spinning Powerbomb! York pins Keller!

...1...2...!

Steve Hebert: No! Keller's leg's on the bottom rope! Yes! Survival! It's what makes the world go 'round.

York drags Keller back to the center of the ring and tries to lift Keller up, getting him onto his back.

Lex Robinson: Yes! Time for York's "Made for TV" finisher! But...Keller's kicking his feet and reaching for the ropes!

Steve Heber: He's got 'em! This is going to be it. I can feel it... I can feel it in my loins!

York tries to pull Keller away from the top rope, only for Keller to slide out of York's grip. He jumps up to the middle rope and tries to attempt a cross-body against York, but...

Lex Robinson: Keller misses York!

Steve Hebert: God, that fucking idiot.

Lex Robinson: York's got Keller back to his feet and...back into a torture-rack position on his back!

Steve Hebert: Get to the ropes, Cable King! ...Or King Cable; or whatever your faggy name is!

Lex Robinson: Keller tries to reach for the ropes a second time, but...there it is! York flings Keller back and hits his "Made For TV" neckbreaker! The ref counts the pin...!

1...2...3!

Lex Robinson: Sebastian's done it! The York name is once again clean! Sebastian York retains his Impulse Title!

Steve Hebert: Hmph! There are still two Kellers around to dirty it again next time!

Lex Robinson: I thought there was only one other?

Steve Hebert: Look, listen, it's not like I pay attention to things. Eat me.

York raises his arms in victory and poses with the Impulse Title. He holds his back a little, but climbs the turnbuckle to hold the belt high over his head, half of his face bloodied from the cut on his forehead. He looks back at Keller's beaten body a moment from his spot high on the ropes, then climbs back down to spit blood on Keller's chest. York leaves the ring with a victorious grin on his face, while Keller can only pull himself back up against the ropes and cuss to himself.

Winner: Sebastian York

Stevie Swing is still looking for Morgana. Aren’t you glad you ordered this PPV? She walks past a certain World Heavyweight Champion, who appears to be looking through a bit of one way glass into some showers.

Chris Extreme: A little to the right…

Stevie notices that Extreme has a remote control in his hand.

Stevie Swing: Hey Chris…what are you doing?

Chris Extreme: Gassing these Jews.

He turns around…

Chris Extreme: Want to fuck me while I push the button?

Stevie Swing: Uhh…no. Isn’t that what Mercedes is around for?

Chris Extreme: I am a Nazi, meaning that I aggressively fuck everything that moves.

Stevie Swing: That’s cute. Have you seen Morgana?

Chris Extreme: No.

Stevie Swing: That sucks. Do you know where her dressing room is?

Chris Extreme: No, and if I did, why would I tell you, when I have all these Jews to gas?

Stevie Swing: Because I’d suck your cock while you pushed the button?

Chris Extreme: That is hot. I tell you what…if you have got a hotter name than Mercedes, I will let you fuck me while I push the button.

Stevie Swing: Is “Stevie Swing” sexy enough?

Chris Extreme: Jew! Jew! Jiggly-jiggly Jew!

Chris throws the remote at Stevie, who ducks it. The remote smashes into the wall, breaking into pieces. Extreme stares at Swing for a bit, his eyes following the jiggling.

Stevie Swing: Yeah…I guess they do jiggle. See ya.

Swing walks off. Extreme returns his attention to the one way mirror…the Jews inside the shower have escaped!

Chris Extreme: I have been foiled by Jew-cunt!

Submission Match

The arena goes black and a low hiss is heard. "I'm So Sick (T-Virus Remix)" by Flyleaf fades in harshly, cranked up to its highest setting possible. An image appears.

/ the
destiny
show

i will break into your thoughts
with what's written on my heart

Scarlet fireworks explode in chain up to the top of the entrance ramp, where the flames form a ring of fire from which Destiny emerges. She sways down to the ring, an albino snake resting atop her shoulders.

i'm so sick infected with where I live
let me live without this
empty bliss,selfishness
i will break! break!

Handing the snake to a stagehand, she slides into the ring, reveling in the reaction of the crowd. She tests the ropes, motions for her music to be cut, and feigns a devilish smile.

destiny
fulfilled /

Steve Hebert: Here's Destiny and her stupid snake, wobbling to the ring.

Lex Robinson: Probably wobbling because of the damage done to her knee. All caused by Corey Ashton, too, might I add.

Steve Hebert: Serves the crazy bitch right.

FOR ADORA.

Strung Out comes roaring over the sound system with “Ultimate Devotion.” This brings out Everybody’s Hero, Corey Ashton, through the curtains. A pair of black Muay Thai style shorts, black kneepads and matching black boots makes up his attire, basically looking like an Oreo cookie. Corey makes his way into the ring, underneath the bottom rope and stands up with a grin. His beloved public showers him with a mixed reaction, but mostly negative.

Lex Robinson: There's Corey Ashton... that scumbag... that bastard.... that no-goodnik.

Steve Hebert: Ilove him. He should beat up whores like Destiny Daniels more often.

Lex Robinson: Of course you'd say that.

Steve Hebert: Oh, come on, Destiny has been begging for a beatdown for weeks now. From screwing over Corey countless times, to even kicking him when he was down. It's insane.

The bell rings...

Lex Robinson: Here we go, Steve.

Destiny stumbles towards Corey...

Steve Hebert: Look at her. What a stupid idea for her to come down here with that wonky wheel. I hope Corey Ashton rips her knee off and shoves it up her smelly asshole.

Lex Robinson: Jesus... you can't deny she's a fighter, though.

Steve Hebert: Yeah, look at her fighting. Just as Corey kicks her in the leg, she crumples to the ground, on her last leg. Haha, Corey smiles at this, realizing he has tihs match in the bag. And look, he even kicks her in the face for good measure!

Lex Robinson: That's sickening.

Lifting Destiny up to her feet, Corey chops her across the chest, knocking her into the corner. In here, Corey delivers a few more rapid-fire chops, coupling that with wrapping Destiny's right leg around the middle rope and then kicking at it.

Steve Hebert: Destroy her! Kill the bitch!

Lex Robinson: Destiny is whipped across the ring... but she collapses halfway across!

Steve Hebert: Haha, excellent. Corey Ashton walks over to Destiny, stomps at the back of her knee, grabs her foot and then places his own foot on the back of her knee. He then stomps her leg into the canvas!

LeX Robinson: Ugh... still with her foot in his hand, he stands Destiny up... only to tuck in and Dragonscrew-legwhip her!

Steve Hebert: Yes! Yes! Destroy her!

Lex Robinson: He even... wait... what are the fans looking at?

Everyone's attention turns toward the entrance, where Chris Carson is shown walking out through the backstage curtain. Getting a loud jeer, he smiles, while heading slowly to the ring, holding a black and red "SOS" t-shirt in his hand.

Lex Robinson: What the hell is he doing here?!

Steve Hebert: I dunno... but I have no problems with him out here!

Lex Robinson: Of course not. In any event, Corey Ashton lifts Destiny up again, placing her onto his shoulders. With nowhere to go but down, Destiny is dropped onto the canvas, with Corey Ashton buckling his left leg around her right... and bam! Down goes his knees onto her hers!

Steve Hebert: Listen to her cries of pain. I love it. It turns me on.

After delivering one more knee to Destiny's knee, Corey Ashton stands up and hollers at the crowd. Wrapping his hands around her ankle and her hair, he forces her up to her feet, where she receives a forearm to the jaw. With her foot cupped in his hands, he goes to take her down, but Destiny strikes with an enziguiri out of nowhere!

LeX Robinson: Whoa!

Steve Hebert: No!

Lex Robison: Destiny has taken down Corey Ashton! Is this her comeback?

Steve Hebert: My God, I sure hope not.

Wobbling up to one leg, Destiny grabs Corey from behind, applying a Dragon Sleeper!

Lex Robinson: Dragon Sleeper! This could be it!

Steve Hebert: C'mon, Corey, you can get out of this!

Lex Robinson: The referee is checking on him, seeing if he submits...

Steve Hebert: He's saying "No!" I can see it!

LeX Robinson: That's easy for you to say.

Steve Hebert: No, really is saying it!

As Corey goes to power his way out, Destiny drops to his side, delivering a 3/4-swinging reverse-neckbreaker!

Lex Robinson: Destiny stops that!

Steve Hebert: Goddamnit... why?!

Lex Robinson: To give Corey a taste of his own medicine, Destiny crawls down to his feet and applies -- get this -- her own version of an anklelock!

Steve Hebert: No! No!

Lex Robinson: The referee is dropping down, checking on Corey...

However, just as the referee's attention is turned, Chris Carson jumps onto the apron, wielding a steel chair in his hands.

Lex Robinson: What the...?

From behind Destiny and the referee's attention, Chris Carson pulls the chair back and swings it forward, smashing it against the back of Destiny Daniels's skull!

LeX Robinson: No!

Steve Hebert: Yes! This is much better!

Lex Robinson: Destiny collapses to the mat... even Corey doesn't know what's going on.

Steve Hebert: It's not like he cares. Either way, he's dazed, forcing him to roll back and apply the rightful version of an anklelock -- The Ashton Lock!

Lex Robinson: The referee is checking on Destiny...

Steve Hebert: It doesn't matter she's out, anyhow.

Lex Robinson: The move is applied on that injured leg of hers, too!

With no other choice, the referee calls for the bell, seeing an unconscious Destiny Daniels, who is unable to tap out. Upon hearing the bell ring, Corey releases the hold and rises to his feet, where he proceeds to spit on a fallen Destiny Daniels.

Steve Hebert: Ah-ha! Take that, bitch!

Lex Robinson: I can't believe this. Corey Ashton has won this match... all thanks to "The Creep".

Steve Hebert: Speaking of which...

Chris Carson hops into the ring, going face-to-face with Corey Ashton. They exchange words... only to shake hands and then laugh.

Lex Robinson: Jesus, this is awful. They're a unit.

Steve Hebert: Thank fucking God.

Chris Carson tosses Corey an "SoS" shirt, which he quickly slips on over his wrestling gear.

Lex Robinson: Things just go from bad-to-worse.

The image fades out, last showing Corey and Chris celebrating in the ring.

Winner: Corey Ashton

Once again, we return to the backstage area. This time, the camera shows Chris Extreme walking through the halls, fiddling with his cock, which resides in his filthy, white boxers. When he eyes his room, he devilishly smirks and pushes open his door, looking over his shoulder, making sure there's no trouble lurking. Entering inside, he momentarily allows the camera to catch a glimpse of the image inside -- that being the form of a large, cloaked man, who had a hood over his face.

Chris Extreme: Hey--...

Before he continues, he notices the camera shining on him.

Chris Extreme: Get that fucking thing out of here, you goddamn Jews! You're not allowed to see what's going on in here! Go!

...which forces him to slam the door in the cameraman's face. Luckily, we're still able to overhear what's being talked about inside.

Chris Extreme: Are you ready? If things don't go right, I'll need you to step in.

...silence...

Chris Extreme: I'll take that silence as a yes. Good!

Chris claps his hands.

Chris Extreme: All right, the match is right now. Pay close attention.

The door to the locker-room opens again, showing Chris Extreme, along with the hooded person. Angered, Chris Extreme bursts out, pushing down the cameraman.

Chris Extreme: I said "Get out of here! Go!"

With the camera fallen to the floor, the last few images of Chris Extreme storming off is shown, strapping his title around his waist, in the process.

World Title Match

The childlike and disgusting sounds of farts and belches are heard, bringing the attention of everyone towards the backstage area. A large but pops out through the curtain, getting a large ovation from the crowd. The rest of the person's body is soon shown, revealing the form of Booger, who jiggles to the ring, having random fans reach out and squeeze his man-boobs for good luck.

Lex Robinson: Booger!

Steve Hebert: What a disgusting human being. I can't believe he's getting a World Title shot.

Lex Robinson: Hey, it was your boy, Chris Extreme, who gave him the shot.

Steve Hebert: Only because Declan Turner was killed by Morgana!

Lex Robinson: ...Uh... Declan's neck was injured after Morgana accidentally John-Woo kicked him.

Steve Hebert: Accident? Surrrrre. I know how she is. She was probably trying to worm her way into this match.

LeX Robinson: In any event, Declan Turner is not here tonight; thus Chris has decided to give Booger the shot. Probably because Chris is afraid to face anyone else.

Steve Hebert: Hell no. Chris Extreme is a mighty warrior. He's Chris Obama, for Christ's sake.

The silent crowd gazes in awe as a giant, heart beating globe of Earth slowly descends from above. In horror, the people watch as the Earth begins to bleed. When the Earth finishes its descent and reaches the surface of the stage, Chris Extreme's voice is heard shouting from within Earth's core.

The Earth explodes into smithereens and "Sonne" by Rammstein blasts over the speakers. Bloody, flaming pieces of the planet fly in the air and land on the closest people in the crowd. From within the wreckage of Earth stands "Lord Nazi" Chris Extreme in his white boxers and white socks. Around his waist is the Nazi World Title -- the coal black belt with a gold swastika spinning in the middle and an American flag on each side. Standing on his left and holding his hand is Mercedes his Nazi Queen and on his right is Roscoe his half German Shepherd, half Rottweiler dog.

To a roar of hateful boos, "Lord Nazi" swaggers arrogantly down to the ring along with his two companions. Seeing different people in the crowd, he taunts them with racial slurs and sacrilegious blasphemies, while Roscoe barks viciously at them. On numerous occasions, "Lord Nazi" points to his World Title, to his woman, to his dog, and to himself, gloating and power tripping. At ringside, he threatens more fans in the front row by spitting in their faces, swearing that he will kill each and every one of them.

Walking up the steel steps, he takes off his World Title and hoists it up with one arm. To his pleasure, more boos flood his ears. Giving his World Title to Mercedes, she slings it over her shoulder and walks around the ring with Roscoe to spectate and cheat. "Lord Nazi" enters the ring finally, and is ready to fight.

Steve Hebert: Oh Chris, my Christ! That Nazi Title looks glorious around his waist. I hope it shall never leave his beautiful waist.

Lex Robinson: Why don't you just kiss him.

Steve Hebert: Maybe I will, Lex. Maybe I will.

LeX Robinson: ...

Steve Hebert: But then again, Mercedes would be pissed.

Lex Robinson: She'd beat you up and lock Chris in the basement.

Steve Hebert: It's true.

Removing his Nazi World Title, Chris's cock wiggles in his boxers, as he hands the title off to the referee.

Steve Hebert: Lightbulbs go off as fans try to picture Chris Extreme's wiggling cock.

Lex Robinson: Disgusting.

Steve Hebert: But wait... Booger challenges Chris Extreme to a cock-wiggling contest!

Lex Robinson: What the fu--...

Instead of keeping it in his pants, Booger whips out his fat cock and wiggles it in Chris Extreme's direction. A smell purges from his oily cock, as smegma drips off the end of it, angering Chris Extreme.

Steve Hebert: This truly is gross!

LeX Robinson: Worst of it all is that Chris is offended by this.

Steve Hebert: Booger's uncircumsized cock versus Chris Extreme's circumsized cock... who wins?

LeX Robinson: No one.

Out of nowhere, Chris pulls a pair of scissors out of his boxers, removing them from his asshole. Upon seeing them, Booger runs away, with Chris Extreme giving chase.

Lex Robinson: Cocks are wiggling everywhere!

Steve Hebert: Get 'im, Chris! Cut that foreskin off! Cut that disgusting foreskin off! Just don't get any smegma on your hands.

LeX Robinson: Around and around they go... until Booger stops, out of breath. This gives Chris Extreme the chance to catch him and grab onto his... uh... nether-regions. Jesus.

SteVe Hebert: Chris grabs onto Booger's cock! Here comes the snip-snip!

Lex Robinson: The edge of the blade is held against Booger's foreskin, but before Chris can clench down, snipping it off, Booger punches him in the head!

Steve Hebert: Uh oh. Now Chris is pissed.

Lex Robinson: He throws the scissors at Booger, who ducks! The scissors goes flying into the front row, jabbing into someone's neck! Blood squirts everywhere! Someone call an ambulance! Way to go, Chris Extreme, you fucking idiot.

In the meantime, Steve Hebert pulls out a hot dog, walks over to the bleeding fan, and uses the spurting blood as ketchup. Taking a seat, Steve Hebert continues watching the match, while eating the hot dog.

Steve Hebert: ...What? Why are you looking at me like that?

LeX Robinson: Uh...

Steve Hebert: Oh, come on; I've done much worse.

Back in the ring, Chris Extreme demands Booger take a dive. Booger, wanting to become the greatest World Champion ever, crosses his arms and shakes his head -- no. This prompts Chris Extreme to turn his back, point to the backstage area, and wave to his apparent "back-up".

Lex Robinson: What's Chris Extreme doing now?

Steve Hebert: It's the artillery!

From the back, a large hooded-figure comes out, ready to standup for Chris Extreme. When he arrives at the ringside area, Chris instructs him to stand on the floor, giving Booger one last chance.

Steve Hebert: Chris Extreme is warning Booger. If Booger does not comply, Chris will have the large man kill Booger. Trust me, Chris Extreme has had many men killed. Like one time, this black guy ate his cookie... so, what did Chris do? He had him killed. That's the guy of gusto you have when you're the Nazi president of the United States.

LeX Robinson: Don't we already have a Nazi President?

Steve Hebert: Way to rage against the machine, shithead.

Lex Robinson: Eh...

Booger denies his "last chace", thus prompting Chris Extreme to punch him in the belly.

Steve Hebert: Booger denies him! How dare he!

Lex Robinson: Chris with the punch!

Steve Hebert: ...But his hand gets stuck in Booger's belly! What the bloody hell?!

Laughing, Booger jiggles his stomach, twisting Chris Extreme's arm/wrist. He then wraps his smelly arms around Chris, placing the World Champ's head in his armpits, looking for a submission.

Steve Hebert: Oh no! No! Escape, Chris, escape!

Lex Robinson: Belly-to-belly suplex by Booger!

Steve Hebert: Oh dear... Booger has flattened Chris Extreme into a pancake. This is the worst night ever. Booger is going to be our new World Champion. I can't believe it. This is all Declan Turner's fault.

Lex Robinson: Instead of covering a flatlined Chris Extreme, Booger exits the ring, going onto the apron. Moving ridiculously slow, Booger climbs to the top turnbuckle...

Steve Hebert: But the hooded-man reaches up, grabbing onto Booger's foot! He can't move! Booger's attention is diverted away from Chris Extreme, who is just now rising to his feet! Chris rushes into the corner, climbs the ropes... Cock-Factor off the top rope! Booger has left a dent in the ring!

Lex Robinson: Ugh, who the fuck is this hooded-man?

Steve Hebert: Who cares? Chris Extreme is laying his cock across Booger's tits, getting the cover.

The referee counts...

...1...2...3!

Steve Hebert: Chris Extreme retains!

Lex Robinson: God why?

After the match, Chris Extreme stands to his feet and is rewarded with his Nazi World Title. Just as he's given the title, Chris Extreme proceeds stomping and kicking at Booger, whom he feels has betrayed him.

Steve Hebert: Kill him, Chris! Kill that traitor!

Lex Robinson: The hooded-figure is coming in, too. Chris is telling him to strike Booger...

Steve Hebert: He has a chair! The hooded-man runs forward and... strikes Chris Extreme with the chair! What the fuck?!

Lex Robinson: What the...?! Chris goes down!

Pulling off the black hood, the person reveals him to be... Dan Black!

Steve Hebert: Dan motherfuckin' Black... what the hell are you doing?!

Lex Robinson: Dan Black has just blasted Chris Extreme out of the ring with a steel chair! He has returned! And he's friggin' pissed!

Steve Hebert: The fans are going nuts for Dan Black... of all people! What the Jesus?

Standing in the ring, above Booger's fallen body, Dan Black watch with calloused eyes, as Chris Extreme retreats to the back, angered that his secret weapon has turned against him. Nevertheless, the Nazi World Title remains his, even though he still has a meeting with an injured Declan Turner coming up...

Winner: Chris Extreme

Stevie Swing turns the corner…and there she is…Morgana!

Stevie Swing: Morgy!

The former World Champion turns around.

Morgana: Huh?

Stevie Swing: Morgy, it’s me!

Morgana: Who?

Stevie Swing: It’s me, Stevie Swing! I’ve got something to tell you…

Morgana: Right…you want an autograph or something?

Stevie Swing: No. I want you-

Stevie is cut off by a spray of mace to her eyes! She drops to the floor, writhing in pain…and a signed picture of Morgana magically drops at her feet. Morgana has disappeared!

A time not so long ago...

...maybe two days...

The scene opens up in a small chapel. A few Sin Wrestling cameras are strategically placed around an altar and towards the back. Small, undoubtedly fake, white roses and bells decorate the sides of mahogany benches, and a red train runs a short distance from the entrance to the altar. Several funky looking people sit on said benches, talking amongst themselves, with a little old lady sitting at a black piano in the corner, having a fat priest dressed like Elvis tries to flirt with her.

There's one familiar face in the crowd -- Declan Turner, who has a neck-brace on.

He sits in the front row, checking his watch every five minutes, apparently bored out of his wits. Andrew Keller, clad in a simple open-collar black suit, lined with red satin, steps out from behind a long blue curtain that connects the chapel to the dressing room. His hair is slicked stylishly back, and he has on new black loafers. The expression on his paled face is grim, as if here was scared to death, and he rushes over to Declan, like a man possessed.

Andrew Keller: I'm really doing this, right?

Declan Turner: Don't ask me that now. This wasn't my damn idea.

Andrew grumbles something underneath his breath and wipes his clean-shaven face. He fixes his suit, even though it looks perfectly fine, and stands tall in front of his best man, who refuses to stand at the altar, looking like an idiot.

Andrew Keller: How do I look?

Declan Turner: What the fuck? How should I know?

Elvis taps Andrew on the shoulder and does a small jig.

Elvis: The little lady is ready.

"She sure is!" comes a lady's voice.

All eyes turn toward the owner of the feminine voice, displaying Jay standing near the altar, in a white and baby-pink mermaid gown with a heartshaped bust-line; a white, floral waist corsage; and floating, handmade Chantilly flowers on a sheer white train that covers her face and most of her back. Her dark hair is in long, satiny curls, and a beautiful bouquet of white and baby pink flowers rests in her hands. She smiles at her soon-to-be husband and then turns to face the old woman at the piano, whispering something in her woman's ear.

Watching this unfold, Andrew turns to Declan and takes a deep breath.

Declan Turner: Say goodbye to freedom, my friend.

Jay hollers at Andrew again. He sighs aloud before walking to the altar. When Jay tries to walk past Andrew, he grabs her hand and gives her a gentle kiss on the cheek. The bride-to-be blushes and looks to the side with a shy smile on her face.

Jay James: I look hot, don't I?

Andrew Keller: Yeah, we're going to talk about how much all this costs, later.

Jay impatiently stomps her foot.

Jay James: I already told you, Andrew; it's my wedding. I don't care how much my beautiful Vera Wang dress costs. By the way, who are all these people I don't know?

Andrew Keller: Huh? I had Declan round up a few people from the club next door.

Jay James: They smell! I don't like them! EWWWW!

Andrew sighs and shakes his head slightly.

Andrew Keller: What do you want me to do?

Jay James: [sucks her teeth] Get rid of them, duh!

Andrew Keller: Ah fuck.

Elvis jives his way into the frame and clears his throat.

Elvis: You guys only paid for an hour.

Jay rolls her eyes and lifts her dress before walking to the back of the chapel. Elvis slides on the floor, having a difficult time trying to lift himself up at the altar, being soon joined by Andrew, who turns and faces the rest of the chapel.

The woman at the piano begins playing "Jailhouse Rock" and Jay walks her way down the aisle, while Elvis begins a strut and wiggles his legs in tune to the catchy song. Once Jay reaches the altar, the music immediately stops, but Elvis decides to continue his trademark dance. Jay impatiently clears her throat and the man shakes his head.

Elvis: Oh, sorry, I can't help myself sometimes, little lady. Anyway, let the show begin.

He pauses, becoming a little more serious.

Elvis: Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to join Jessica Samantha James and Andrew Keller in holy matrimony. These two have decided to recite their own vows, which we will begin immediately, since they only have ten minutes left in this ceremony. Repeat after me, little lady.

Jay James: Andrew... I take you to be my lawfully-wedded husband. I take you, with all of your faults, and although they be many, I still love ya, babe. Um... I want to spend the rest of my short-life with you. I love you, Andrew. We can make babies together, now. Isn't that great?

The audience "aww"' because it's so cute.

Andrew Keller: Jessica, I take you to be my wife. Okay, let's exchange rings.

The audience "boos" because it's too short! And isn't it ironic how much a wedding sounds like a wrestling match?

Andrew Keller: Give me a break.

Elvis: The rings, please...

Declan stands up and hands Jay a small jewelry box and then hands Andrew one, as well. They take turns putting their bands on one another, and Jay's face glows as she looks at her platinum diamond wedding ring for the first time.

Jay James: This better be real, Andrew.

Andrew Keller: Real enough.

Elvis: By the power vested upon me by the King -- and I don't mean Jesus -- I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may now kiss the bride.

Andrew lifts Jay's veil and kisses his new wife with affection. The small crowd claps, while Declan just shakes his head. Jay and Andrew turn hand-in-hand to face the back of the chapel.

Elvis: Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Mr. and Mrs. Andrew Keller!

Someone in the chapel viciously cusses at the announcement, and "Jailhouse Rock" begins once more. Mr. and Mrs. Keller walk down the aisle, hand-in-hand, and make their way towards a waiting black limo...

...

Fzzzzz...

The screen buzzes and the feed to the wedding reception cuts out. The scene shows Jay, now clad in her wrestling attire, standing in front of a television, watching her wedding.

Jay (another fucking) Keller: I'm married! Damn! I forgot about that again!

Jay examines the rock on her finger, as Andrew walks into her dressing room, as if he has the God-given right not to knock.

Andrew Keller: You almost ready or what?

Jay Keller: Quit bugging me! Damn! We've been married for two days and I'm sick of you already!

Andrew Keller: What? I don't understand you!

The scene cuts to unhappy matrimonial static.

Last Person Standing
Television Title

The lights dim into a bloody red glow, then throb to life with a guitar riff like an alarm. Pyro fires off in red flares. As the song evolves into a rhythmic drumbeat and bass line, a haunted version of Queens of the Stone Age’s "Sick, Sick, Sick", two symbols embossed on alternating red-black backgrounds--the universal red symbol for "no", and the circle-cross symbol for the female gender--flash with the downbeats across the Sintron screen. A red-and-black "CC" mix into the subliminal display, while the symbols fuse into a new logo as the flashes quicken.

Chris Carson comes out with a purpose, wearing a black shirt with the same logo painted across it in white and red. Carson jaws with the audience, then sprints to the ring when two-thirds of the way to the ring. He slides under the bottom rope, standing in the ring with his logo illuminating it. He climbs the nearest turnbuckle to taunt the audience with a sneer, pointing at his shirt.

Lex Robinson: With the Television Title strapped around his waist, "The Creep" Chris Carson is out for the final match of the evening!

Steve Hebert: Yay, main event time, yay!

Lex Robinson: What a show we've had so far, but there's still more to come. A lot more.

Steve Hebert: Such as an explanation on what happens when it becomes midnight! Do we go into a leap year or something?

Lex Robinson: Uh... well, we do. But I'm sure there's more to it than that!

Steve Hebert: Phew. Maybe it involves Chris Carson killing more sluts.

Lex Robinson: If his newfound-bond with Corey Ashton is true, then who knows? It just may very well be.

Steve Hebert: [with hesitation] Hey, now, I was just killing. Chris Carson is no serial killer or anything.

Lex Robinson: ...Oh. Well... all right! Perhaps Jayson Keller will blast off to his home planet, then.

Steve Hebert: If we're lucky, his jet will make a 90 degree turn and head straight for the sun.

Lex Robinson: Eh... the champ is in the ring and we're waiting for the challenger, Morgana. Remember, this is a Last Person Standing Match; and on top of all that, Sin Wrestling will not be held responsible for whatever happens between these two. All injuries, damage and violence will not be accountible for Sin Wrestling.

Steve Hebert: God, I hope Chris Carson beats her hard. I mean, sometimes I just want to tittyfuck that Morgana. Other times, I just want to anally rape her, while punching her in the back of the skull. If only there were a way to combine both.

The arena unexpectedly descends into total darkness, sparking the crowd into an expectant frenzy. After a long moment of anticipation, "Piece of Me (Remix)" by Britney Spears pulses through the sound system, accompanied by an image of Morgana in all of her pink-haired glory, which overtakes the screen.

The crowd cheers at nearly deafening decibels as hot pink and gold fireworks explode down the ramp, prompting Morgana to saunters out from backstage. Wearing a miniscule pink and black skort, black fishnets, knee-high boots and a tight black tank top, her long hair pulled into two loose braids, Morgy slowly makes her way toward the ring, blowing kisses to fans in the front row as she does so, her every step accompanied by another explosion of fireworks.

Basking in the cheers of the crowd, Morgy pauses on the apron before grasping the top rope and flipping gracefully into the ring. "Piece of Me (Remix)" dies abruptly over the speakers as Morgy parades confidently around the ring, waiting for the match to begin.

Steve Hebert: I'm fapping.

Lex Robinson: Stop that!

Steve Hebert: I came.

Lex Robinson: ...At least you're done.

Steve Hebert: I mean, Morgana is such a dirty piece of slut. Granted, Chris Carson is going to destroy her... rip her arms off and jam them up her cunt... split her asshole open... and all that, but... you know.

Lex Robinson: No, I don't know. Please shut the hell up.

Circling each other, "The Creep" and Morgana readily prepare for their match to begin, not removing a single eye from the other. Sooner than later, the bell will ring and they will begin ripping each other apart.

Steve Hebert: Man, talking about giving someone the eye... they're burning a hole right through each other right now.

Lex Robinson: Just wait until the bell rings, then we'll see...

Without further ado, the bell rings, starting the contest...

Steve Hebert: Here we go!

Lex Robinson: Like a bat out of hell, Morgana charges across the ring, attacking Chris Carson with reckless abandon!

Steve Hebert: This is terrible! This is not how things are supposed to go!

Lex Robinson: Oh, really? What was supposed to happen?

Steve Hebert: "The Creep" was supposed to jump her from behind and then shave off her pink hair, making her bald!

Lex Robinson: Morgy's furious attack corners Chris Carson, causing him to turtle, trying to save himself from the damage.

Steve Hebert: He's not turtling! He's just... he's just setting himself up to make an attack of his own!

Lex Robinson: Right...

Sick and tired of being wailed on by Morgana, "The Creep" pushes her back, only to have her rabidly re-attach herself to him, striking him with punches, slaps and chops.

Steve Hebert: Oh, goddamnit. That's not good.

Lex Robinson: Anything goes, too. Don't forget about that.

Steve Hebert: I won't forget... especially when "The Creep" is jamming a broomstick up her twat.

Lex Robinson: Again, Chris Carson pushes Morgana back. This time, instead of instantly jumping back at him, Chris Carson gives her some punches of his own. In due time, they are trading punches; going blow-for-blow, each of their shots striking at the exact same time!

Steve Hebert: Soon enough, Chris Carson gains the upperhand, though! After a smattering of wicked blows to her stupid pink head, Chris Carson knees her in the temple and then pulls her back up. Kicking the twat in the twat, Chris Carson runs towards the ropes, bounces off them, and... oh, great... just great. As he returns, Morgana baseball-slides between his legs.

Lex Robinson: Damn right! And she leaps right back up, too! She delivers a snap-dropkick, pushing herself off his chest and flipping back, sending him backward. Again, she snaps back up, seeing Chris Carson charge right back at her. This time, she ducks beneath a clothesline-attempt from him and uses the middle-rope as a springboard to fly back and deliver a tilt-a-whirl headscissors onto "The Creep"!

Steve Hebert: He roars back up, though, and charges right back at her, like an angry pride-filled lion.

Lex Robinson: Hurricanrana!

Steve Hebert: But the dumb bitch rolls him up into a pinfall! There's no pinfalls in this match. In order to win, you must completely knock your opponent out for 10 seconds.

Lex Robinson: I believe she's just now realizing this.

Steve Hebert: Of course she is! Christ, Chris Carson is pushing her off him and is standing to his feet, grabbing her pink hair. Smashing Morgana's face into the turnbuckles, "The Creep" traps her against the pads, even going as far as to step onto the middle-rope and place his right knee against the back of her knee, keeping her face planted against the top turnbuckle. Eat it, you bitch. Eat it, like how you eat the juicy cocks!

Lex Robinson: ...Are you okay, Steve?

Steve Hebert: I'll be fine... unlike Morgana.

Hopping down, Chris Carson repeatedly smashes her face off the top turnbuckle pad, halting that, only to turn her around and rip into her chest with some chops. Irish-whipped her across the ring, Chris Carson goes to follow in, racing swiftly behind her. Still with her wits and eyes open, Morgana opts not to crash into the turnbuckle pads, but to instead push herself into the air, using the top rope.

Lex Robinson: Into the air, Morgana pushes herself out, wrapping both legs around Chris Carson's head. From there, she swings herself out, hoping to take him down with a tilt-a-whirl headscissors...

Steve Hebert: Not quite! As she swings to the side, Chris Carson stops her. He throws her in the opposite direction; and she lands onto his knee, with "The Creep" delivering a backbreaker! Fucking excellent!

Lex Robinson: Wow, what a redirection. He's even applying more pressure, too, obviously wanting to damage her back.

Steve Hebert: If we're lucky, maybe he'll break it.

Laying across Chris Carson's right knee, things seem hopeless for Morgana, until an idea pops in her head. An idea that involves using her foot to kick "The Creep" in the head.

Lex Robinson: With nowhere to go, Morgana does the wisest thing she can possibly do... that being kick Chris Carson in the head, while laying across his knee.

Steve Hebert: And it works, too, unfortunately.

Hopping onto her feet, a very astute Morgana watches as Chris Carson holds his face, visibly upset at her escape. Turning towards her, he makes several swings/punches in her direction, with her ducking backward at each attempt. It isn't until he tries a reverse-clothesline that things pick up, with Morgana leaping onto Chris Carson's shoulders, swatting at his head with a flurry of punches.

Steve Hebert: Chris Carson is furious! She's bouncing around like a goddamn frog!

Lex Robinson: She even leaps onto his shoulders, striking him with some severe punches to the head.

Steve Hebert: He'll show her severe...

Lex Robinson: Chris Carson goes to throw her off, but she lands on her feet. She strikes him with an elbow-to-the-face and runs forward, allowing her to leap onto the middle rope. Unlike the last time, though, Chris Carson travels forward, leaps into the air and connects with a jumping-forearm to the back of Morgana's skull, stopping her before she can leap back! This results in her spilling over the top rope and floating -- err... crashing to the outer part of the exposed apron!

Joining Morgy on the apron, Chris Carson pulls Morgana up to her feet, via her pink hair. After chopping her across the chest, an annoyed Morgana fires back with a swat of her own. Unfortunately, "The Creep" sends a knee into her gut, stifling any sort of comeback, which hunches her over, putting her in prime-position for him to transfer her into another maneuver.

Steve Hebert: "The Creep" is hooking Morgy up...

Lex Robinson: Agreed, he's placing her wrist between her legs... and he lifts her up, delivering "The C.C. Crash"!

Steve Hebert: That was a wrist-clutch fisherman's buster onto the outer part of the ring! Not only does Morgana's stupid head and neck smash off the ring, but she also smashes to the floor that is below! She had it coming, anyhow, trying to be like a ninja, wanting to laugh at gravity's face.

Lex Robinson: On the floor, "The Creep" hovers around Morgana like a vulture.

Steve Hebert: He is a vulture, Lex. He wants to devour her whole.

Lex Robinson: Is that a sexual euphemism?

Steve Hebert: God, I wish.

Chris Carson jams his foot into Morgana's head with a series of stomps. When he appears finished with that, he turns toward the jeering crowd and pulls two chairs out of the front row and then proceeds to yell at the fans he stole the chairs from. Tossing one of the chairs into the ring, "The Creep" retains the other chair, opting to throw it at Morgana, who had been attempting to rise to a kneeling position.

Steve Hebert: Hah! So much for trying to get back up, you dumb, old bag.

Lex Robinson: Having thrown the chair at Morgy, "The Creep" now turns towards the ring-steps, which he holds high in the air, holding it in front of his face.

Steve Hebert: Oh crap...

Lex Robinson: As he charges towards Morgy with the steps, Morgana grabs the chair that he flung at her and uses it to smash into the ring steps! This then causes the steps to bash into Chris Carson's head, coupling that with the stairs falling on him, as he collapses to the ground!

Steve Hebert: His head may have been crushed by that! My God, that's awful.

Lex Robinson: Grabbing the steps, Morgana sets them up, furiously kicks at "The Creep"'s head, and then drags him over the steel steps. Placing his head in a wedge, Morgana picks up the steel chair, while standing on the upper-step. Oh dear...

Steve Hebert: Holy fuck, she just blasted his head between the steel steps and the steel chair. This is the worst day, ever.

Lex Robinson: She holds that chair up again... and bam! She dents the chair by smashing it off the top of "The Creep"'s head!

Steve Hebert: Is she trying to kill him or something?

Lex Robinson: I would hope so.

Tossing the damaged chair into the ring, Morgana rolls back inside, while the referee begins counting down Chris Carson.

Steve Hebert: Oh dear God, get up, "Creep".

...1...2...3...4...

Steve Hebert: Come on!

...5...

Lex Robinson: At the count of five, "The Creep" stands, looking absolutely stunned. Nevertheless, he slides back inside, where Morgana instantly unloads with a feverish amount of kicks and stomps to his head.

Steve Hebert: Leave him alone, you venomous wench!

Lex Robinson: Plucking Chris Carson up to his feet, she jams the edge of the chair into his gut, following that up by bouncing off the ropes and returning with a seated-dropkick to the side of his head. Seeking even more damage, Morgy grabs the chair, opens it up and sets Chris Carson's head on the seat, partially exposing his head through the opening.

Steve Hebert: Oh Christ, what's she up to now?!

Lex Robinson: All I know is that she's exiting to the outer part of the ring...

Springboarding off the top rope, Morgana somersaults through the air, doing a complete 360 degree flip. On her way down, she extends her legs, jamming both feet into the back of Chris Carson's head, guillotining his head onto the steel chair, almost beheading him!

Steve Hebert: Agh! No!

Lex Robinson: Morgana almost takes off Chris Carson's head! He lays lifelessly across the chair, his head still dangling outside of the opening...

Steve Hebert: The referee is counting him down, again...

...1...2...3...

Steve Hebert: Jesus merciful, get up, "Creep".

...4...

LeX Robinson: When the referee's count reaches 4, Chris Carson finally begins to stir, even using the chair to help him rise. Unfortunately for him, Morgana is soon to go back on the attack, much to the delight of the fans!

Steve Hebert: Can someone please kill this bitch?!

Lex Robinson: Assaulting Chris Carson with some kicks and punches, Morgana straddles her longtime rival, bashing him over-and-over again in the face with some punches. Standing to her feet, Morgana takes the previously used chair and flattens it across "The Creep"'s chest.

Steve Hebert: This is not good, either.

Lex Robinson: With "The Creep" laying in the middle of the ring, Morgana steps to the ropes, where she snaps herself up onto the top rope, using it as a springboard. Vaulting back, she twists her body into a corkscrew, landing with a corkscrew senton onto the chair; and onto Chris Carson!

Steve Hebert: She even rolls through with it...

Lex Robinson: Indeed. Rolling through with the senton, she shakes off the damage done onto herself and then springs towards the next set of ropes...

Hurdling towards the opposite set of ropes, she again leaps onto the middle rope, using it to further propel herself to the top rope. Once again, she uses the top rope as a springboard, using it to swing back, hitting a Phoenix Splash onto the chair and onto "The Creep"!

Lex Robinson: Phoenix splash! Holy cow!

Steve Hebert: The thing about that, though, is that as much as that hurt Chris, it also hurt Morgana and her ribcage!

Lex Robinson: You're very right, Steve. Both Chris Carson and Morgana are writhing around, in a dubious amount of pain. Nevertheless, Morgy is the first up, and she is slowly followed by Chris Carson, who tosses the steel chair aside. Dejected, he begins to rise, holding his ribs, while Morgana bursts towards him...

Steve Hebert: That cunt, Morgana, comes up behind "The Creep", though. She leaps onto his shoulders... ugh...

Lex Robinson: And she delivers a reverse hurricanrana!

Steve Hebert: It completely flips him over. From being driven onto his skull, he pops back up, landing squarely in the corner, where he leans against the turnbuckle pads.

Lex Robinson: Realizing this, Morgy goes into the opposite corner and jets forward. Cartwheeling and flipping in, she goes for a handspring-elbow... but before she can hit, "The Creep" reaches out to the other steel chair, picks it up and then viciously whacks it across Morgana's skull, as she pops off the mat!

Steve Hebert: Yes! Kill the bitch! I really do think she is dead, now!

Lex Robinson: Her momentum carried her straight towards that steel chair, which Chris Carson smashed against her skull! Holding his ribcage, "The Creep" stumbles against the ropes, watching as the referee begins to count Morgana down!

...1...2...3...4...

Steve Hebert: Goddamnit, she rises at four.

Lex Robinson: Despite having her bell clearly rung, Morgana continues to fight back. She's not going to go down that easily to "The Creep". Remember, Sin Wrestling won't be held responsible for what these two do to each other, so that just adds to the danger-factor.

As she rolls around in pain, Morgana cowers in the corner, while Chris Carson picks up both chairs. With vigor, he heaves the first chair in Morgana's direction, smashing it against her, as she lays against the bottom turnbuckle pad. He then takes the other chair and measures Morgy up, allowing him to run forward and then go chair-to-chair, smashing it into Morgana!

Steve Hebert: Yes! Crush her stupid, pretty face.

Lex Robinson: He lays the second chair against the first; now having both chairs laid against the former World Champion.

Steve Hebert: Chris Carson steps into the furthest corner, aiming at Morgy. Charging ahead, he lurches towards Morgana and the chairs, deciding to hit a baseball-slide dropkick to the chairs, smashing them against Morgy!

Lex Robinson: That baseball-slide dropkick was enough to force her into a dangling position, where she is hanging halfway out of the ring! This gives Chris Carson the chance to stumble to the outer-portion of the apron, where he begins kicking and stomping at Morgana, forcing her to tumble out of the ring.

Out here, Chris Carson hoists Morgy up, chops her in the throat and then holds her up into a vertical-suplex position. Furthermore, he drops down, delivering a brainbuster on the floor, driving Morgana's skull into the concrete!

Steve Hebert: Yes! Kill her!

Lex Robinson: The referee hops out of the ring, where he begins to countdown Morgana...

...1...2...3...

Steve Hebert: We're up to three. If this were an actual match, "The Creep" would be walking out of here as the winner.

Lex Robinson: But it's not, so the match continues and the referee counts on.

...4...5...6...

Lex Robinson: Oddly enough, Chris Carson shoves the ref aside, stopping the count. What the hell?

Steve Hebert: What the Jesus? "Creep", what are you doing?!

Lex Robinson: He's punishing Morgana, that's what. From beneath the ring, Chris Carson pulls out a broomstick!

Steve Hebert: Hmm... well then, that's not so bad.

Lex Robinson: "The Creep" blasts the edge of the broomstick into Morgana's spine, crippling her, disabling her from standing. Positioning her in a kneeling position, he stands above her, still with the broom in hand. Grabbing onto it with both hands, he brings the boomstick down across Morgana's skull, cracking it into two pieces!

Steve Hebert: Yes! Yes! My god yes, I'm erect. Oh god, I'm definitely erect.

Lex Robinson: A welt appears on Morgy's head, showing where the broomstick was broken-in-half. Those two pieces are thrown into the ring, while Chris Carson picks Morgy up and then bashes her skull off our announcing desk! To further this, he scoops Morgy up and slams her across our desk...

Steve Hebert: Oh Jesus, get outta the way.

Making a throat-slash symbol, Chris Carson hops onto the ring apron, where he looks at the crowd, who give him a roaring jeer. Upping the ante, Chris Carson proceeds to climb to the top turnbuckle pad, going to a place where he is not known to go.

Steve Hebert: Be careful, Chris. You're not used to being open here.

Lex Robinson: Seriously. This is an area that's more known to Morgana; and not Chris Carson.

When the time is right, Chris Carson leaps off the top turnbuckle, gliding through the air, thinking he is some sort of lightweight. He kicks out his legs, looking to legdrop Morgana through the announcer's desk; only to have things go terribly wrong.

Lex Robinson: Morgana rolls out of the way!

Steve Hebert: He crashes through our table, sending woodchips, splinters... and announcers everywhere!

Like Steve says, just as they see Chris Carson fly, they go sprawling elsewhere. Standing up, they bare witness to Morgana rolling safely off the table, making Chris Carson splinter through the table and land harshly on the floor!

Steve Hebert: This is awful. We don't even have a good place to sit!

Using her wits, Morgana crawls towards the ring, using the apron to help herself stand. On the outside, the referee begins counting Chris Carson down.

Lex Robinson: The count is being made...

...1...2...3...4...

Steve Hebert: Christ, we're up to four...

...5...6...7...

Steve Hebert: Get up, "Creep, you old bastard!

...8...

Lex Robinson: He's up!

Steve Hebert: Thank fucking Dickens.

Lex Robinson: Morgana, who is aware of Chris Carson starting to rise, immediately hops onto the ring apron, her back turned to him. Looking over her right shoulder, sordid thoughts sift through her mind... with recklessness leading the way.

Steve Hebert: Huh? What do you mean?

Lex Robinson: I mean we better get out of the goddamn way because Morgy is about to fly.

True to word, Morgana springboard moonsaults through the air, using the middle rope to gain flight. Soaring back, she flies onto Chris Carson, who tries to catch her, but ends up toppling over the ring railing.

Lex Robinson: Wow! Both Morgy and "The Creep" go into the audience!

Steve Hebert: If only they had to kill some of these stupid, stupid fans.

Lex Robinson: Remember, fans, always stand back and let the Sin Wrestlers do their "thing". Never try to join in.

Steve Hebert: Don't be giving them such ridiculous advice. Step in, punch Morgana in the head. Do it for me. Do it for Steve.

Climbing back over the railing, Morgana heads towards the ring and climbs back inside. Stepping inside of the ropes, he stands up and watches as Chris Carson slowly rises. When the time is right, she bounces off the furthest set of ropes and in one big leap, she is able to jump onto the top rope.

Lex Robinson: Morgana springs off the top rope, flies through the air like a rocket, somersaults and takes out Chris Carson, who is on the other side of the rail!

Steve Hebert: Not only that, but they take out the first five rows of people! Chairs, idiots and popcorn flies everywhere.

Lex Robinson: This is f'n nuts!

As the referee hops over the ringside, joining the two competitors that are laid out, he observes the damage, which is scattered about.

Steve Hebert: It looks like a goddamn tornado has passed through here.

Lex Robinson: Either that, or a nuclear bomb has gone off. I swear.

Steve Hebert: Heck, our own goddamn table is broken, for crying out loud! They're literally trying to kill each other!

Lex Robinson: And the referee is counting, too. I'm not even sure who he's counting down, but he's doing it!

...1...2...3...

Steve Hebert: Is he counting down both Morgana and Chris Carson? It seems like it!

Lex Robinson: I think so! What will happen, in that case?

...4...5...6...

Steve Hebert: Hell if I know. I guess they both lose.

...7...

Lex Robinson: Wait, Morgana is up! How about Chris Carson? Can he break the count?!

...8...9...

Steve Hebert: Yes! He's up! Just in time, too! He even used a random fan in a wheelchair to help him stand!

Lex Robinson: Disgusting. In any event, Morgy goes to deliver more damage onto him...

Steve Hebert: Chris sees this! In turn, he steps aside and then pushes the fan in a wheelchair at Morgana, literally knocking her off her feet! Hell, the wheelchaired fan goes flying, too!

Lex Robinson: Oh my God, that's despicable. Look at the smirk on "The Creep"'s face. Someone should just slap it off. In fact, I hope it's Morgana that does so.

Steve Hebert: Morgana will be lucky if she isn't in that wheelchair by the end of the night, Lex. So, quit your yappin'.

Lex Robinson: Picking up a chair, Chris Carson demolishes it across the back of his opponent, Morgana, who is laying prone on the floor. He's not even allowing the referee to move in and start a count.

Steve Hebert: Nope. Right away, he stands over Morgy, who is laying on her stomach, allowing him to drop a knee into her spine, reach forward, fish-hook her mouth and then pull back. Hell, he even grabs ahold of her hair, for good measure. It's all good, Lex, remember? Anything goes! Hell, we're not responsible for it, according to you!

Lex Robinson: Unfortunately, it's true.

Steve Hebert: As she's laying on her front, he even reaches forward and delivers some uppercuts to the chin! That's good... nice and smart. I like it. Wear the bitch down.

Lex Robinson: Eventually releasing his hold, he stands to his feet, kicks Morgy in the skull and then grabs her by the hair. With a trail of pink hair between his knuckles, he pulls Morgy to the back of the arena, nearing the wall of the building.

Steve Hebert: Back here, he lifts her up and then throws her into the wall. In the meantime, shades of her marriage with Timothy Ashton come floating back to Morgana. Oh, look, here comes a fist from "The Creep", too. It's all coming back, now!

Lex Robinson: Oh, shut up.

Plodding around at the back of the arena, leaving a stymied Morgana leaning against the wall, Chris Carson picks up a concrete brick. Looking at it with pure, unadulterated joy, "The Creep" eyes Morgana, who is holding her face and head, trying to regain consciousness.

Steve Hebert: Oh boy, this will be fun.

Lex Robinson: Lifting the concrete block up, he heaves it at Morgy! Thankfully, she ducks and the block smashes off the wall, breaking into pieces! Meanwhile, a very aggravated Chris Carson charges at Morgana... only to run into an elbow-smash! Grabbing onto his face with a 3/4 facelock, Morgy goes to use the wall to flip off, hitting the Fata Morgana... except Chris realizes this! Thinking quickly, he dumps her over his head, allowing her to land on her feet behind him!

Steve Hebert: Christ...!

Lex Robinson: This time, it's Morgana who runs at him.

Steve Hebert: He tries for a clothesline, but she ducks underneath his arm, continuing to charge at the wall. Running up the side of it, she kicks off and backflips overhead of Chris Carson! She's a goddamn monkey, that's what she is!

Lex Robinson: Confused beyond belief, he turns around... only to witness her running at him again. This time, he places two hands on her stomach and pushes her into the air, hoping to toss her into the wall.

Steve Hebert: But she kicks off the wall and jumps back, allowing her to latch onto the next deck! What the fuck?

Lex Robinson: She pulls herself up onto the second deck... and backflips off, with a moonsault! "The Creep" is aware of this, though; and thus, he is able to sidestep the free-falling Morgana, who is just as aware as him, though. Knowing that he has moved out of place, Morgana allows herself to land safely on her two feet...

Steve Hebert: ...Only to have Chris Carson grab a chair from the audience and then recklessly fling it towards her head! Bam! Down she goes!

With Morgana down, Chris Carson yells at the referee, demanding that he count Morgana down...

Lex Robinson: With a steel chair wrapped around her skull, Morgana is left to listen to the referee count her out.

Steve Hebert: Good! This is a long time coming.

...1...2...3...4...5...6...

Lex Robinson: Morgy begins to move...

...7...8...

Lex Robinson: She's up to her feet!

Steve Hebert: Damnit.

Lex Robinson: She was two seconds from being defeated, though. It was close. Really close.

Steve Hebert: Not close enough.

Angry at the fact that Morgana is now up to her feet, Chris Carson moves toward her and knees her in the gut. Grabbing her head, he throws her face-first into the wall and then drags her back out, where they head toward the stage/entrance area.

Steve Hebert: They're going towards the stage area, now!

Lex Robinson: This is where the wrestlers come out!

Steve Hebert: Obviously, dipshit. Considering we've seen everyone come out through there the entire night.

Lex Robinson: Rolling Morgana onto the ramp, Chris climbs up with her, taking his time ti lift her back up. Positioning her in a standing-headscissors, he hoists her up and then piledrivers her, dropping her head-first onto the steel ramp!

Right away, the referee moves in, about to count out Morgy...

Steve Hebert: Count her down and out!

...1...2...3...4...5...

Lex Robinson: Not letting the referee continue, Chris pushes the referee aside and then lifts Morgy back up. Not quite smart.

Steve Hebert: Meh. He just wants to kill her.

Lex Robinson: Grabbing a handful of hair, "The Creep" drags her forward and throws her off the opposite side of the ramp!

Steve Hebert: Haha, yes! She just plunged all the way to the cold, hard floor.

Jumping off the ramp, going alongside Morgana, who hit the floor with a sickening thud, "The Creep" grabs a wire that had been hanging from the set. Taking his time, he uses the wire to tie a knot around Morgana's feet.

Lex Robinson: Now what?!

Steve Hebert: He's roping the bitch up; that's what he's doing!

Lex Robinson: He stomps her skull before grabbing the other end of the wire, which dangles from the top of the stage. Yanking on the wire, Chris Carson elevates Morgana in the air, leaving her hanging upside-down. He then takes the other half of the wire and ties it onto the stage, leaving her dangling, unable to protect herself.

Steve Hebert: He's got her hung up like a dirty whore. Walking over to Morgy, he begins wailing on her with some punches, glad to know that she's unable to save herself. When he's finished smacking her in the mouth, he grabs her and aims her towards the stage area...

Lex Robinson: God, he swings her forward, smashing her against the set!

Steve Hebert: It's like a car crash... actually, no, it's more like Dennis Rodman crashing into a mountain, after that retarded stunt he did on Fox!

Lex Robison: This is worse. Much worse!

Steve Hebert: Steadying her, he takes a step back, grabs a chair and progresses forward.

Lex Robinson: Oh god; with her hanging like that, she's unable to defend herself.

Steve Hebert: We've already been over this. That's what makes this so great.

Darting forward, Chris Carson goes to swing the chair at Morgy, ala a baseball bat. However, at the last second, she is able to pull her body up, completely dodging the brutal attack.

Lex Robinson: She pulls herself up!

Steve Hebert: How the...?

Lex Robinson: Surprised, Chris Carson turns around, wanting to batter her, but again, she squirms her way out of the way.

Steve Hebert: God, just grab the bitch and nail her. And I'm not talking sexually, either. Just blast her across the face.

Lex Robinson: As "The Creep" nears her, trying to strike again; Morgana strikes with a forearm to his face, following that up with a flurry of other slaps, claws and swats. Eventually, she has him reeling back, giving her the chance to pull herself up and begin untying herself from the wire.

Steve Hebert: Oh Jesus. I at least hope she falls and breaks her neck.

Lex Robinson: Not gonna happen, as she is able to easily slink her way down, still with the wire in hand. Wrapping it around her right arm, she hops onto the entrance ramp, watching as Chris stumbles about, holding his throat, gasping for oxygen.

Steve Hebert: Only because she caught him with a wicked chop to the throat! What a cunt.

Lex Robinson: Morgana watches "The Creep" turn around. When the time is right, she... she... she jumps off the ramp!

Steve Hebert: Oh God, she's like motherfucking Tarzan! She swings through the air and connects with two-feet to Carson's chest, sending him flying through the air... landing on the sound-board!

A gigantic electrical spark shoots off, as Chris Carson crashes onto the board, reverberating a raucous sound all throughout the arena!

Lex Robinson: My God! Chris Carson rolls off the sound-board, dropping onto the floor! He's visibly shaken...

Steve Hebert: Shaken? Fuck that; he's cooked! That electrocuted him! He's goddamn fried!

Lex Robinson: Shivering and shaking on the floor, Chris Carson overhears the referee starting to count him down...

...1...2...3...4...

Steve Hebert: It can't end like this! Not because Morgana went into a psychosis and thought she was goddamn Tarzan!

...5...6...

Lex Robinson: It's getting closer...!

...7...

Steve Hebert: He just needs to stand.

Steve Hebert: Morgana, on her her knees, watches on. She wants this to be over, too.

...8...9...

Steve Hebert: He stands!

Lex Robinson: "The Creep" is up! He breaks the count!

Steve Hebert: Hah! Not even a bit of electrocution can stop him. He's a freakin' beast.

Lex Robinson: ...And he's mad.

Steve Hebert: Pissed is more like it. Convulsing, he angrily stands to his feet, targeting Morgy, who is unable to ready herself for his incoming attack. Right away, "The Creep" floors her with a stiff-forearm to the bridge of her nose, which no doubt sends a shockwave of pain through her entire body.

Lex Robinson: Exchanging blows, they even happen to fight down the aisle, eventually reaching the ringside area.

Steve Hebert: Whipping each other back-and-forth into the railing, they manage to fight all the way back towards the ring. They've pretty much gone full-circle all over this terrible place.

After throwing Morgy front-first into the ring post, Chris grabs her hair and then bashes her skull off the ring apron, proceeding to roll her back inside of the ring. Before he goes to slide back in, he lurks underneath the ring, enabling him to pull out a wooden table.

Steve Hebert: It's table time!

Slipping it inside of the ring, he climbs onto his knees on the ring apron, and then rolls back inside. Instead of setting up the table, he focuses on the broken half of the broomstick, which had been tossed into the ring earlier. Grinning like a maniac, he picks it up, wielding it in his hands and hovers over Morgy, who is just now getting to a kneeling position.

Lex Robinson: We have a table in the ring; and Chris Carson brandishing that wooden handle like a spike. What else is there to come?

Steve Hebert: Some fucking blood. Hell, I'd be okay with some period blood, at this point.

Lex Robinson: "The Creep" -- which is a fitting name, by the way -- looks like he is searching for just that. Grabbing Morgy's hair, he extends his arm up, about to jab the edge of that broken-stick into Morgy's head...

Steve Hebert: Mmmm... period blood.

Lex Robinson: Jesus, pay attention. This is quite serious!

Having fought all over the arena, Morgy is now on her knees, inside of the ring. With Chris Carson standing behind her, holding the edge of that broomstick closely to her skull, violent thoughts rage through her mind, knowing what she must do.

Lex Robinson: Wait...! As he goes to jab that piece of wood into her head, Morgana reaches forward and grabs onto the other piece of wood, which she had been hiding beneath her! Taking it, she whips around; and from a kneeling position, she jams the stick into Chris Carson's crotch!

Steve Hebert: Argh! What the fuck?! I don't want goddamn cock blood! I said vagina blood!

Lex Robinson: "The Creep" launches back, holding his groin... and, well... if you're a man, that was painful too watch.

Steve Hebert: She really is "The Penis Killer." I think I'm gonna be sick.

Noticing Chris Carson hunched over, holding his crotch, the referee, who has been following all the action, begins to count him down.

Lex Robinson: The count is on...!

...1...2...3...4...

Steve Hebert: Goddamnit, "Creep", fix your junk and get back into this.

...5...6...7...

After some readjusting and some spitting, "The Creep" rises when the referee gets to seven. Upon seeing this, Morgana goes back to work, connecting with some kicks and stomps to his midsection.

Steve Hebert: She's just kicking away, without a care in the world! Have some compassion! How do you expect "The Creep" to have some creepy kids?!

Lex Robinson: Anything goes. Last person standing wins.

Steve Hebert: Don't make me sigh. Still with her part of the broomstick in her hand, Morgana hovers around Chris, who also has his half. As Morgana waltzes up to him, she is immediately struck with the edge of the stick, stopping her kicks and stomps. Thank god.

Lex Robinson: In fact, "The Creep" rises and faces Morgy, who doesn't turn away. Like two wild animals they begin striking each other with the pieces of that broomstick, using the pieces as spikes! Going tit-for-tat, they jab the edge of the handle into the other's head, splitting both of them open! The fans are going insane!

Steve Hebert: Hah! He has that bitch, Morgana, busted open!

Lex Robinson: He's cut wide-open, too, though!

After they hammer each other over-and-over again, splattering blood everywhere, they soon come to a stop, resulting in them both collapsing to the mat, bleeding profusely and out-of-breath.

Lex Robinson: They both go down! Morgana is bleeding from the forehead, having blood drip down her face and into her mouth! Chris Carson is busted open, as well! His face is actually soaked in the crimson mask!

Steve Hebert: This is fucking violent.

Lex Robinson: They used the pieces of that broomhandle as goddamn spikes. It's no wonder they're bleeding!

Steve Hebert: More importantly, the referee is counting them down!

...1...2...3...4...5...

Lex Robinson: This is just like before, when Morgy dives through the air, taking out Chris Carson and the first five rows! Who will be the first to stand? Hell, can one of them even stand?!

...6...7...

Steve Hebert: Don't speak so soon! "The Creep" is on his feet!

...8...

Lex Robinson: He uses the ropes to help him up!

...9...

Lex Robinson: Morgana is up, too! She narrowly beats the count!

Steve Hebert: Too close! I want instant replay!

Lex Robinson: There is no instant replay. She got up at the count of 9; and that's final!

Steve Hebert: Son of a bitch...

Lex Robinson: I'm sure Chris Carson is as aggravated as you, too. Stumbling, complete with blood-red face, races over and grabs onto Morgy's pink hair, which is now awash in blood.

Steve Hebert: So much for ol' Pinky, eh?

Lex Robinson: Well, "Ol' Pinky" is being slung into the middle of the ring, where she receives a desperate knee from Chris Carson. To add to this, he standing-headscissors her, double-underhooks both arms and then delivers a butterfly-powerbomb into a backbreaker! Discouraged and aloof, Chris grabs onto the ref and throws him to Morgana, making him count her down. This could be it!

Steve Hebert: Yes! Go "Creep"! He has her!

Lex Robinson: Laying against the corner, he sits against the bottom turnbuckle and watches the referee count Morgy down...

...1..2...3...4...

Lex Robinson: Can she rise? Can she get back to her feet?

Steve Hebert: If she doesn't, "The Creep" wins the feud... and retains the Television Title!

...5...6...7...

Lex Robinson: ...And she's up!

Steve Hebert: Oh, fuck that.

Offended at Morgana's resilience, Chris Carson stamps his foot on the canvas, immediately going back to work on the former World Champ.

Lex Robinson: Morgy is lifted upon her feet, receiving a stiff-blast to her face.

Steve Hebert: That's a usual Saturday night for her.

Lex Robinson: Moments later, she is turned around and is then dropped throat-first across the top rope, allowing him to set-up the table that's been brought into the wrong.

Steve Hebert: Finally! I hope he drives that bitch through the table, sending wood chips everywhere.

Lex Robinson: ...Kind of like our announcing table.

Steve Hebert: May it rest in peace... or pieces. Whichever you prefer.

Once the table is stood up, "The Creep" returns his focus to Morgana, grabs her head and then smashes her bloody face across the table! Seconds later, he begins smashing at her head with some elbows, hoping to widen the cut on her forehead. When ready, he steps aside, grabs one of the chairs that remain in the ring and blasts it across Morgana's ribcage!

Lex Robinson: Ow!

Steve Hebert: Yes! I can finally it getting closer! She won't be able to stand. I know it!

Lex Robinson: And he delivers another chairshot!

Steve Hebert: She's all laid out. Rip out her ovaries... or at least abort the fetus inside of her.

Lex Robinson: Uhh...

Steve Hebert: Fine, just rip out her ovaries so that she never delivers a hellspawn to the world.

Lex Robinson: What about Julius?

Steve Hebert: Julius has been flushed down the shitter. May he rot in peace. He had a good run.

Lex Robinson: You're a terrible human being. How can you call yourself a man?

Steve Hebert: Because I like to look at underage nude pictures of Luxe Libertine? Hell if I know.

When he's finished smashing the chair off Morgana's stomach/ribcage, Chris tosses the chair to the outside, allowing it to clang against the floor. Ripping Morgana off the table, he back-elbows her in the chin and then buckles her over, putting her into a standing-headscissors.

Lex Robinson: Uh oh. Oh no.

Steve Hebert: Oh yes! Using the last of his energy, Chris Carson lifts Morgana up onto his shoulders, arranging her into a powerbomb position!

Lex Robinson: Conscious of this fact, Morgana begins using a last-ditch effort to start pummeling her fists into Chris Carson's head, her tiny fists jamming into his wound like a pair of scissors! Having him dazed, Morgana is able to hurricanrana "The Creep", escaping the predicament before being slammed through that table!

Steve Hebert: Ugh... that's awful.

Lex Robinson: Even with the blood spilling into her eyes, she was aware of what was about to happen.

Steve Hebert: But is she aware of this...?

Chris Carson rolls to his feet, not liking what Morgana has just done. He goes to accelerate at her, but Morgy rises just as he does. Sensing severe repercussion, Morgy makes a quick decision.

Steve Hebert: Chris Carson charges...

Lex Robinson: Morgana counter-attacks with a running John-Woo Kick!

Steve Hebert: That's the same goddamn move that she hit Declan Turner with at the last Eternity! The same move that caused him to become injured and be unable to compete tonight!

Lex Robinson: Right now, it's the move that knocks "The Creep" onto the table!

Steve Hebert: Fuck!

Lex Robinson: In an act of vengeance, she lifts up the steel chair that had been used on her previously. Showing no compassion whatsoever, a bloody Morgana bashes Chris Carson across the head and then lays the chair across Chris's chest. She points to the top turnbuckle pad! This could be Morgasm-time!

Steve Hebert: I just wish it were orgasm time. With the way things are headed for the "The Creep" it may not be "orgasm-time" for him for a long, long time.

The crowd is in an uproar as Morgana steps out onto the apron, climbing to the top turnbuckle, wishing to put Chris Carson down, once and for all. Alternatively, "The Creep" is also aware of his terrible situation. Popping his eyes open, he notices Morgana almost on the top rope, prompting him to grab the chair that's laying across his chest; and then heave it directly at her skull!

Steve Hebert: Yes! Actually, maybe it is orgasm-time, after all!

Lex Robinson: In a last ditch effort, Chris Carson throws the chair at Morgana's head, smashing it against her ruptured skull! As a result, she hangs upside-down in the corner, almost in a Tree-of-Woe position!

Steve Hebert: "The Creep" is smart, too. He's capitalizing on this.

Lex Robinson: Uh... where the heck is he going?

Not only does Chris Carson roll off the table inside of the ring, but also rolls out of the ring. Just like before, he searches under the ring and pulls out a secondary table.

Steve Hebert: Here we go!

Lex Robinson: We now have 2 tables in play!

Steve Hebert: It's serious business time!

Lex Robinson: The table is slid into the ring and is then laid upon the original table. We now have a double-stacked table -- with Morgana hanging from the corner nearest to them.

Steve Hebert: "The Creep" has a plan. He's going to put her away for good. There's no way she'll be getting up before 10 -- no chance at all!

Lex Robinson: He slides back inside, stomps on the back of Morgana's head and then sits her on the top rope. Climbing up alongside her, he makes sure she's dazed enough and he... he's turning his back on her. A splash-mountain powerbomb, perhaps?

Steve Hebert: I don't know what the fuck that is; but it sure as hell isn't what he's doing. Instead, he's pulling out a bottle of lighter fluid and is pouring it across the top table.

Lex Robinson: What the holy Jesus?

Steve Hebert: He throws the bottle into the fans, where hopefully someone will drink the remaining contents. Next, he pulls out a match... and there's fire! My god, the top table is on fire!

Lex Robinson: Holy Jesus! He's a fucking lunatic!

Steve Hebert: Don't fucking swear at me, you prick!

Lex Robinson: This is not good. Morgana needs to wake back up.

Steve Hebert: He's going to superplex her through the flaming stack of tables! I just know it! That'll put the bitch down for good!

Flames flicker in the air, as Chris Carson puts Morgana into perfect position, standing her on the top turnbuckle. Wrapping her left arm around his neck, he goes to superplex her... only to have her wrap her own left leg around the top rope, blocking the attempt!

Steve Hebert: Goddamnit!

Lex Robinson: She's blocking it!

Chris Carson relinquishes his hold, delivering a forearm to her jaw.

Steve Hebert: Even if it kills him, Chris Carson is going to put Morgana through those goddamn flaming tables.

Morgana responds with a ringing-clap to his ears, obviously dazing him.

Lex Robinson: Not if she has anything to say about it!

Delivering a thrusting-chop to his throat, Morgana turns away from "The Creep", having her back face him. Seconds later, she is applying a 3/4 facelock...

Lex Robinson: Wait...! Oh my God!

Using the top turnbuckle, Morgana kick-flips through the air, sending Chris Carson off the top rope with a Fata Morgana -- also sending him through two tables; one of which is on fire!

Steve Hebert: No! To quote Hayden Christienson as Darth Vader, "Noooooooo!"

Lex Robinson: Holy shit! The fans are going nuts! The referee is counting...! They're both down!

Steve Hebert: With any luck, she's singed some of her hair!

...1...2...3...4...

Lex Robinson: One... two... three... four...

...5...6...7...

Steve Hebert: Jesus, we're at five... now six... and seven. Get up, "Creep"!

...8...9...

At the count of 9, Morgana reaches up to the top rope, helping her stand.

Lex Robinson: Morgana's up!

...10...!

Lex Robinson: Morgana wins! Morgana has beaten the count! Holy Christ! This match is over! What a gruesome, violent match!

Steve Hebert: No! No! No!

Lex Robinson: It's over! Morgana has defeated Chris Carson! The referee raises her hand and presents her with the Television Title!

Steve Hebert: Where's the shotgun? I'm going to kill her; and then myself!

Lex Robinson: Sit down, Chris Benoit.

Steve Hebert: But... "The Creep"!

Lex Robinson: He lost; get over it!

Receiving the Television Title upon her victory, a bleeding, bruised and dilipidate Morgana listens to the fans chanting for her. In the meantime, Chris Carson, who is equally bloodied and beaten, rises to his knees, trying hard to believe what has just happened.

Lex Robinson: The referee attends to "The Creep", whose shirt has been singed; and whose skin has been burnt. You can even smell it.

Steve Hebert: Despite the burns on his skin, a kneeling Chris Carson throws two broken-halves of the table to the floor, obviously disgusted with the loss.

Lex Robinson: That's only instinct, too. I don't even believe he is truly conscious.

The fans continue to pour in their praise, lifting Morgana's spirits high. Their attention is sliced apart, however; as the screen turns black, except for a tiny clock ticking on the screen.

Lex Robinson: Uhh... Morgana has won, but now what?

Steve Hebert: If we're lucky, it's the countdown to doomsday.

Lex Robinson: There's a clock ticking down...

Lex Robinson: ...Okay...?

The lights in the arena suddenly cut out.

Steve Hebert: Great; just great. Someone forgot to pay the power bill. I can‘t see shit. Who the hell is touching my leg?! Is that you, Lex?

Lex Robinson: Uhm, no.

...An announcers voice cuts through the silence...

Steve Hebert: I still don't understand...

Lex Robinson: That’s The Collective’s theme music! But where is Declan? Or Marquardt? Or Madison-Pa-... whoa, wait...

Steve Hebert: It’s Andrew Keller! He's running down from the back! What the heck is he doing here?!

Andrew Keller slides into the ring, catching a defeated Chris Carson by surprise.

Lex Robinson: Andrew Keller is kicking and stomping at Chris Carson! In fact... oh my! Andrew Keller with a wicked punch to Chris Carson's face!

Steve Hebert: He calls that "The Mouthpiece". However, I still don't understand why he'd be out here.

Lex Robinson: Well, he did come up short against "The Creep" at the last Eternity. Hell, it was via DQ, as Jay interfered and attacked Chris Carson. In any event, Chris Carson's head disgustingly snaps back, sending blood splatters everywhere! The music is still going on... I don’t see how-...

Steve Hebert: Morgana had better look out! From behind, Jay James... uh... Jay James Keller, I guess, slides into the ring, delivering an agonizing chairshot to the back of the new Television Champion's head! Good! The bitch had it coming, as far as I'm concerned.

Lex Robinson: Oh my God, Morgana has been dropped to the canvas! What the hell is going on here?! Jay throws the chair down. She the lifts Morgy up by her hair, kicks her in the stomach and then applies a front-facelock...

Steve Hebert: A front-DDT by Jay! Yes! Morgana's bloodied face smashes hard into the canvas!

Lex Robinson: This is awful. We need to get someone out here...

The music continues and Declan Turner walks out of the back, with Stephen Marquardt and Madison Paige-Matthews at his side.

Steve Hebert: Well shit... Declan Turner is actually in the building!

Lex Robinson: So much for being too injured to wrestle...

He takes his time walking down the ramp, acknowledging the crowd and touching hands before climbing into the ring, microphone in hand. As he begins to speak, he receives a very mixed reaction from the fans.

Some fans chant "COL-LECT-IVE"...

While others give him a mighty jeer, not liking what they have just been witnessed to.

Lex Robinson: The fans are very split on what they've just watched. Some hate this; some love it.

Steve Hebert: Me, personally, I don't know what to think. I mean; sure, it's great Morgana gets beaten down some more... but poor "Creep"!

Declan finally speaks.

Declan Turner: Many of you now know just exactly what The Collective is all about. You have seen first-hand just exactly what we’re capable of. I am the current Tag Trophy holder and soon-to-be crowned World Champion. And the other four...

He points to Marquadt, Madison Paige, Andrew Keller and Jay James Keller.

Declan Turner: ...are your future title holders, as well.

This also receives a very mixed ovation.

Declan Turner: Sin, don’t get it twisted. I’m not the leader and this isn’t some bullshit club. This is a gathering of the most intelligent and vengeful minds you’ve ever witnessed, gathered together or one simple goal. Complete and utter domination of Sin’s entire roster. Go back to the chalkboard, everyone. The new standard has been set and the new era HAS arrived.

He drops the microphone, calling his fellow "The Collective" members out of the ring, away from a beaten Morgana and Chris Carson.

Lex Robinson: We have a new group within Sin Wrestling!

Steve Hebert: I don't even know what to think, still...

Lex Robinson: And that's a first! What a way to end our pay per view. Heck, what a way to end our 4th year birthday bash!

Steve Hebert: It was our birthday?

Lex Robinson: Yup. Four years open; and looking to go for many more. Sin Wrestling goes into its next year with more action, violence and insanity. Hell, we already have "The Collective" starting things up. One can only assume that the next year of Sin Wrestling will hail an arm's race like no other.

Steve Hebert: Hell yeah, Cuba can eat my colon.

Lex Robinson: Goodnight, everyone; and be prepared to tune into the next year of Sin Wrestling!

With Declan Turner and company completely exiting the ring, the final camera shots include images of Morgana and Chris Carson, laying beaten, bloodied, bruised and fresh off a war. Their feud may have ended, but the competition elsewhere is just getting started.

Winner: Morgana